4 week old nameless son

As per the title, my son is now 4 weeks old and we still can’t agree on a name for him, it’s getting ridiculous now honestly. Anyone had this issue so long after the birth?!

Dad is stuck on Cyrus and I’m in love with Caspar. I dislike Cyrus and he dislikes Caspar (well, thinks he’d be bullied for it given the outdated ghost association). It would be best to rule them out entirely, but we both keep going back to them.

What do we do? We’ve searched through thousands and thousands of names, as in, there’s literally no name (to an extent) that we haven’t come across… There are very few names we both like: Perseus nn Percy, but the name is just too much. He suggested Finn recently, which I do kind of like, but seems quite bland, especially next to big sister Athena - though I don’t like any of the longer versions of Finn, neither does he. We both quite like Oscar, but it’s incredibly popular in the UK and I don’t want him to grow up being 1 of 5 Oscars in his class, and I just don’t love it. I love my daughter’s name, I did from the get go, and that’s what I want from my son’s name, Caspar is that, but it’s not going to happen.

Tossing a coin or putting them in a hat or something like that isn’t going to work, it’ll just lead to name regret, resentment etc.

Names I like: Leonardo, August, Evander, Orlando, Aurelius

Names OH likes: Vincent, Carter, Gavin, Lucius, Atreus

Middle name will most likely be Cornelius, unless it doesn’t end up flowing right with whatever his first name ends up being.

Help?! I’m at my wits’ end.


Let go of [name_m]Caspar[/name_m] if dad can’t come around to it.

I think [name_u]Finn[/name_u] is lovely! If it’s the one name you both like- I think you found a winner!!

[name_f]Athena[/name_f] and [name_u]Finn[/name_u] sound good together to me. Both literary and strong names. While a little bit different stylistically I don’t think so much so that it’s problematic.

Good luck. I hope you find the perfect fit for your little man!


First of all, congratulations!

Second, this does sound a bit tricky. I agree [name_u]Finn[/name_u] is beautiful and not bland next to [name_f]Athena[/name_f], and you could consider [name_m]Finbar[/name_m], [name_m]Fintan[/name_m], [name_m]Thorfinn[/name_m], or [name_u]Griffin[/name_u] as a long form if you’re not overly fond of other alternatives. And if [name_m]Caspar[/name_m] won’t work, perhaps [name_m]Kacper[/name_m] or [name_m]Kasper[/name_m]? Those don’t seem “ghost-y” at all to me.

A few more ideas:



Have you ever considered a name that’s similar to [name_m]Caspar[/name_m]? Like [name_m]Caspian[/name_m], [name_m]Cassian[/name_m], [name_m]Casimir[/name_m], [name_m]Cassander[/name_m], [name_m]Cassiel[/name_m], or [name_m]Cassius[/name_m]?

Also, I don’t think [name_m]Perseus[/name_m] is too much at all! [name_f]Athena[/name_f] and [name_m]Perseus[/name_m] sound lovely together, actually!

As for [name_u]Finn[/name_u], I don’t find it bland whatsoever, and he would be perfect next to sister Athena!!!

[name_m]Oscar[/name_m] is a sweet name, which also matches [name_f]Athena[/name_f] quite well.

[name_m]Perseus[/name_m] [name_m]Cornelius[/name_m] - a bit too much of the S ending
[name_u]Finn[/name_u] [name_m]Cornelius[/name_m] - lovely lovely lovely!!!
[name_m]Oscar[/name_m] [name_m]Cornelius[/name_m] - also beautiful!!!


I would ditch both [name_m]Cyrus[/name_m] and [name_m]Caspar[/name_m] if neither of you can agree on one of them. If you both love [name_u]Finn[/name_u], use [name_u]Finn[/name_u]! Seems like the best option. I think it sounds great with [name_f]Athena[/name_f]. [name_u]Finn[/name_u] [name_m]Cornelius[/name_m] is very handsome. How about [name_m]Finnian[/name_m] or [name_m]Phineas[/name_m] with the nickname [name_u]Finn[/name_u]? Not sure if you had considered those options. I really like [name_m]Perseus[/name_m] “Percy” to. I don’t think it’s too much, especially with [name_u]Percy[/name_u] as a nickname. From your other options, I like [name_u]August[/name_u], [name_m]Evander[/name_m] and [name_m]Gavin[/name_m] as well.

How about [name_m]Cassius[/name_m] or [name_m]Caspian[/name_m], similar enough too [name_m]Caspar[/name_m] that you both might like? or maybe [name_m]Silas[/name_m] or [name_u]Ellis[/name_u]?

Wishing you the best!


Yes, I’ve considered and suggested all of the alternatives to Caspar, but to no avail.

I like how Athena and Perseus sound, but feels too much on the mythology front.

Seeing Finn paired with Cornelius, I do like it bit more.

Thank you for your help!












Longer names that get to Finn

Has [name_u]Jasper[/name_u] been considered already? Sounds much like [name_m]Casper[/name_m] without the ghostly image.

Fwiw, I highly doubt children will know the cartoon reference



I love both [name_m]Cyrus[/name_m] and [name_m]Casper[/name_m] and I knew a little [name_m]Casper[/name_m] and no one mentioned the ghost. Still, if you can’t agree, I’d look for something else

Based on the names you both like, I’ll throw in the suggestions of


I hope you find one :heart::heart::heart:


It’s such a shame he won’t come around to [name_m]Caspar[/name_m], it’s such a brilliant name! And I agree with you, the ghost association just isn’t a big deal. I’ve taught a few Caspars and it’s certainly never been an issue for them as far as I’m aware. I sometimes find that when someone sees a name used on someone it makes them view it in a more positive light. I recently watched a great show called Invasion with a boy in it named [name_m]Caspar[/name_m] - maybe you could sneakily put that on and point it out when the character comes on? :wink:

I understand your concern about some of the other names you’ve mentioned, especially [name_m]Oscar[/name_m] (which I love) in terms of its popularity. With [name_u]Finn[/name_u], have you thought about [name_m]Phineas[/name_m], [name_m]Finbar[/name_m] or [name_m]Finlo[/name_m]? I’m sure you have but I bring them up because they’re some of the less common [name_u]Finn[/name_u] names.

I’m sure you’ve come across these but here are a few names that I feel might bridge the gap between your tastes:


I imagine this is extremely frustrating for you. I really hope you’re able to find something you both love soon.


I think [name_u]Finn[/name_u] is great! Also what about just [name_u]Percy[/name_u]? It is a stand alone name in my books.

You’ve probably already looked at ALL the names but the first name that came to mind was [name_m]Calvin[/name_m]. [name_m]Calvin[/name_m] is in the middle of [name_m]Caspar[/name_m] and [name_m]Cyrus[/name_m]. [name_u]Cal[/name_u] is a great nn too!

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This is a tricky topic, but as a teen, I can tell you that name bullying, at least at the schools I’ve gone, isn’t really a thing. In fairness, my schools have all had very no tolerance bullying policies, but I have a pretty teasable last name and a slightly confusing first name, and I’ve barely ever had problems with it regarding bullying. So while I see your SO’s point, I think [name_m]Caspar[/name_m] is a great name for you if he can warm up to it.

Another question is if there’s a nickname for [name_m]Cyrus[/name_m] you like (like Cy) or a nickname for [name_m]Caspar[/name_m] your husband likes (like Cas), because there are plenty of families out there that one parent calls their kid by only their nickname.

[name_u]Finn[/name_u] goes great with [name_f]Athena[/name_f] if you warm up to it; [name_f]Athena[/name_f] is a little out there but I’ve met one or two, compared to only two or three or four Finns. [name_u]Finn[/name_u] totally works as a stand-alone, too.

Good luck!

PS would you ever consider using [name_m]Cornelius[/name_m] as a first? It’s super sweet with [name_f]Athena[/name_f]

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I took more than 4 weeks to name a child, and months to decide on a middle name of another.

Don’t feel pressured and don’t let go of Caspar yet. Definitely don’t agree to Cyrus out of desperation. If someone handed me a beautiful baby son of my own having gone through what you have, I’d personally be happy for them to name it whatever they wanted (including Ghost) - and make them a cup of tea every day for 20 years. As others have noted, a child would not be bullied for having the name Caspar. However, if he really just dislikes the name, and it’s important to you that he doesn’t dislike it, I agree with the suggestion of Jasper (the English language version of the name), and also think Cornelius is a great name and goes well with Athena. Could you use it for the first name, or use Cai/Kai (other language versions)? Meaning, origin and history of the name Cornelius - Behind the Name

Oscar and Finn are both great names (biased) but I’m not sure they’re your style - could you say you really like (let alone love) either? What about Lucas rather than Lucius, or Leo rather than Leonardo? Do you like Silas? Or Felix? Milo?


Lots of great suggestions. I thought of:


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Athena and…


You’ll find the name! It’ll be worth the wait, I am sure. :blush:


If you like [name_m]Caspar[/name_m] you might like

names like [name_m]Cyrus[/name_m]

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I like both [name_m]Cyrus[/name_m] & [name_m]Casper[/name_m] but if you can’t agree what about a name that feels mythological but isn’t necessarily like…


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[name_u]Jasper[/name_u] and [name_m]Caius[/name_m] seem like close name options to consider.

I would maybe consider tossing out [name_m]Cornelius[/name_m] and try to utilize from both your lists in creating a combo you can both love and agree upon. Like [name_m]Leonardo[/name_m] [name_m]Vincent[/name_m] or [name_m]Lucius[/name_m] [name_m]Orlando[/name_m]

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Another vote to consider [name_u]Jasper[/name_u].

Could [name_m]Silas[/name_m] be a similar enough but likable name for you?


Another vote for Jasper and Griffin!

I’d stay away from any -us, -as, -os and -es endings if you’re using Cornelius as the middle, though I do love Silas, Sirius, Cyprus, Cypress, Cassius, Remus, Darius and Albus.

Other Cy- names:
Cyril *

Other Cas- names:
Cassian *
Casimir *
Caspian *
Cassander *
Castor *
Caswyn *

Other -ar/-er names:
Dexter *
Ivar *
Kyler *
Luther *
Leander *
Skylar *

Similar names:
Caledon *
Lachlan *