So I have friend in person who is child bearing age and our kids play together. She just became a member on nameberry recently, as she is currently pregnant and I showed this site to her. We were talking the other day and I asked her why she never posts anything, and she said that she doesn’t want to share her name ideas because she doesn’t want to set off a chain reaction and cause her currently unpopular favorite name for a girl (not even in the top 1000) to be “found out.”
I tend not to tell people my children’s names on here but that is for a variety of reasons.
I don’t want people I may know who recognize my kids name to find out ahead of time what we are naming our children
Possible security issues
But I have never really thought “I don’t want to mention this name…it might become suddenly popular…”
I was just wondering how many of you feel that way though? Are there any of you out there who stalk around but withhold your opinions/posts/favorite names in fear of it getting lost in the trend shuffle?
Seems kind of arrogant to assume your name is so good if other people hear it, it’s suddenly going to explode! haha but that’s just me. I don’t mind telling my ideas since I don’t know the people on here. I loooove gathering ideas/inspiration from others on here so it seems only fair to share in return.
Exactly my feelings! I thought she was being silly. I mean, it’s different to not want people to know your children’s entire name for security reasons but…I love bouncing things off people on here, so I can get an idea of what to expect from my family when the baby is born.
Meh, a name isn’t going to suddenly become popular just because it’s posted on an internet forum, it takes more than that for a name to skyrocket in popularity. It is actually good to get some feedback on names one is considering because what if the name has a negative connotation or association you’re completely unaware of? It’s also a good way to gauge how the name will be perceived in general.
I’d agree that it’s not a good idea to post the full name for security reasons, but bouncing an idea of a name around is something different.
Um, that’s exactly the reason why I have never posted my top girl’s name on here. Call me “arrogant,” but I don’t want to share my best idea with innumerable expecting moms across the globe who are looking on here for name ideas; I have LOTS of other name ideas to share gladly, but I’m not sharing my favorite, unused one. Your friend’s name is obviously precious and unique to her, as mine as to me, so why pressure her to toss it out to the masses? Let her keep her special surprise. I’m sure she has plenty of other name ideas that she would be willing to share.
That’s sort of cute. No, I don’t keep my favorites a secret online, although I do in life. Honestly, I’d like for some of the more obscure names I love to be more popular so people would be more familiar with them, instead of saying they’re weird or sound made up when in fact they’re wonderful names that haven’t been used for a very long time.
I never, ever share my favorites with real family or friends anymore though. I shared two in the past that ended up being used, and two others that just got a very long “hmmm” and made me feel wary of using. I know, you don’t own the name. It’s still rude to use it imo, and rather obvious when it’s a pretty rare name that they got it from you. Oh well. There’s always another name to fall in love with. I’d have no problem with someone from a forum using a name I like though. I’d be flattered they got the idea from me, and it wouldn’t stop me from using the same name because the likelihood of us living in the same town are pretty slim.
I like hearing what strangers think about names I like though. Sometimes they make observations about names I’d never considered.
I can understand that. I was reluctant to discuss “my” names until I saw my top name popping up every once in a great while on its own. [name]Even[/name] if it showed up more often, there are so many names we talk about, and so many different styles and tastes, and we are all at so many different points on our lives. Threads come and go. Names spike and fall away on here. [name]Even[/name] the top 1000 contain some very, very rarely heard names. If a name like [name]Elowen[/name] hits top 100, I’ll blame nameberry, but until then…
Yeah, I can’t imagine this doing more than influencing a few parents, who would likely be very far flung. If [name]Elowen[/name] takes off as pp says, I still am not sure it’d be nb - it’s that [name]Ellie[/name] names are on the upswing and people can find [name]Elowen[/name] on any number of baby name sites.
A lot of names I like are top 1000 anyway (some are even top 20, gasp), so, I suppose this makes me a little less worried than I otherwise might be.
Oh I am guilty of that, guilty and slightly ashamed. Whenever I see a post about [name]Eloise[/name] it makes me cringe because I love it so much and I want it to stay this perfect balance of relativity and obscurity until the time I am older. So I refrain from posting. I don’t like to mention my other absolute favorites, [name]Eilidh[/name], [name]Cordelia[/name], [name]Gideon[/name] and [name]Caspar[/name] either. I know this makes me arrogant and exaggerated, but it’s the truth! I just would hate to see twelve thousand little [name]Eloise[/name]'s or [name]Cordelia[/name]'s in kindergarten with mine. I’m sorry!
Well, I guess this is understandable. You are not yet having children and don’t want them to become more popular before you have the chance to use them.
By the way, I just totally lol’ed at your favorite names not being in your “signature”. haha! so funny. I can understand your feelings though.
If anything, I’m more likely to share names with other Berries rather than with people I actually know. Granted, my favorite names (and combos I suppose) are all fairly common and popular (such as [name]Charlotte[/name],[name]Audrey[/name],[name]Norah[/name], and [name]Lucy[/name]) or likely to become popular because of similarity with more popular variations ([name]Clara[/name] vs.[name]Claire[/name] and [name]Emilia[/name] vs.[name]Amelia[/name]/any [name]Em[/name] name really) but still.
I am slightly wary of sharing my favorite names with my friends or family though, because I am worried that they will use my favorites. However, with my friends at least,we share a lot of the same favorite names, but there are certain names that kind of “belong” to one person.Mine is [name]Charlotte[/name], and other friends have claimed [name]Evelyn[/name], [name]Lucy[/name], and [name]Adelaide[/name]/[name]Amelie[/name].
I agree with @scarlettrobin -I don’t think a name will necessarily skyrocket if it’s mentioned on an internet forum. I can only imagine a name skyrocketing if a celebrity uses it or if the name is in a popular book. That, and I think Berries’ favorite names (at least for the less popular names) are much different than most people’s favorite names.
I also agree with the fact that it’s good to get feedback about names. You learn things that you might not know on your own, like if one name means something completely different in another language (apparently [name]Viola[/name] means rape?), or if names(French word names like [name]Elle[/name] or [name]Soleil[/name]) are perceived completely different in another country.
I understand not wanting to mention a full name for security reasons, though.
There was a thread awhile back about name theft ON NB. Really? People actually think they’re the only person on [name]Earth[/name] who ever liked that name? Nobody ever heard of it until they posted? I noticed one of my faves, [name]Lotus[/name], popping up in some threads and signatures after I put it in my sig but I didn’t automatically assume it was name theft. I just started using this site this year so I don’t know what was going on before I got here. Plus I can’t read people’s minds. [name]Just[/name] because [name]Lotus[/name] isn’t in their signature that doesn’t mean they never thought of it.
Maybe she’s really afraid to learn that she’s not as unique and original as she thinks? That her favorite name is already old news to most berries? My #1 [name]Tallulah[/name] has never been in the Top 1000 either yet it’s not unknown to NB. Maybe she’s afraid to get replies like “I know a ___” or “I went to school with three girls named ___.”
I’ve seen this a lot, actually. And I think it just comes with the pervasive thought process that many Berries share, that they need the newest, uniquest, unused name that nobody else has ever had, and searching for a name like that can cause people to be manic, haha. Other Berries have admitted to it.
Honestly, though, I don’t see the point. I had a number 2 name the year I was born (was number 1 four years later when my sister came along!), and I never had any problem with it, I actually like having a popular name. Popularity in no way affects me so I can’t for the life of me understand why it affects Berries so much, lol. So I just don’t see the big deal with withholding the precious name like that, but I have been around Berries (and others on other name sites just like them!) who do. Honestly, though, I agree–if it’s that obscure, it’s really not going to catch on. If it is, we’re probably already talking about the name, and even after you share it, our styles are so diverse that the likelihood that it’ll ever rank (much less that your child will meet another!) is pretty slim.
And honestly, it’s not the end of the world to meet someone with the same name as you. I actually loved that some of my best friends in high school and college were Ashleys–I didn’t even go to school with another [name]Ashley[/name] until I got to the eleventh grade.
I used to, but you know what? ever name and probably almost every combinations have been used at least once. I have very unusual names on my list and combos and I have seen them before which did surprise me. I got over the non-sharing quickly after that.
I don’t want to say anything really mean about it because if she is a member of this site, she may feel insulted. I do have to say that when she does name her child the undiscovered name, others may follow and it won’t feel as special to her anymore. The only way to hide her undiscovered name is to never tell anyone the name of her daughter.
Her fear could be something she will have to slowly get over. Hopefully she will, because it just puts too much stress on her worrying about her favorite name hitting big time if she mentions it.
This is funny, but this reminds me of my thread in the [name]Baby[/name] name forum titled Why is popularity so bad? It helped me to understand more about this subject of being so scared of using a name others use.
I briefly felt like I shouldn’t share my names because they are enormously unique to the people around me, and even some berries have never heard of something I maybe want to use (my examples – Frode, Lykaion, Zarex…) but i got over it.
If it’s super unique, there’s a few people on here that might want to use it, a few who think it’s very nice, and a great majority probably either it won’t be their style or they’ve already heard of it.
I sort of get it. I feel like random names suddenly become ‘popular’ on the forum but I doubt that means a ton of girls called [name]Ren[/name] or [name]Maren[/name] really exist just because I see them a lot here. I think a lot of people really fear popularity with names. I want to avoid the top 50 or so I guess so I get it. I think sharing names is easy for me cause I probably won’t have another for awhile so who knows what I will like & what will be top 10.
I’ve gotten a bit worried that my mentioning of [name]Alessandra[/name] will spike it because I think it’s such a stunning name, and it’s not common but familiar enough. Mostly because I’ve really experienced this with other names, which I don’t think that it’s due to my mentions directly, I think I’m just prone to catching a name just before the boom occurs. It happens a lot with other things in my life as well.
Also, I’m not having kids for another 6-7 years, so I am worried that [name]Alessandra[/name] will jump quite high during that time, and it’ll become watered out to me.
However, I still have it posted in my signature! I have noticed that my favourite [name]Alessandra[/name] combo: [name]Alessandra[/name] [name]Kate[/name] (which is close to my own combo, [name]Alessandra[/name] [name]Averie[/name] [name]Kate[/name]) seems to be quite liked on here a lot.
I think it’s a bit silly to totally withhold a name because of “uniqueness”. Most people enjoy having someone else who shares the name anyways. I always get happy when I see that someone else loves [name]Alessandra[/name] enough to use it. My worries are about me getting “numb” to the name if I hear/see it too much, but not about the actually number of [name]Alessandra[/name]'s going up. Shoot, [name]Olivia[/name] is another name I love that’s number 5 on the SSA.
