Baby girl Smith: what would you advise?

Girl Names
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[name]Ah[/name], yes, the woman who chose [name]Violet[/name] [name]Catherine[/name] and it just didn’t fit. A beautiful name, but sometimes that just isn’t enough.

I couldn’t agree with your post more. There are so many things that are considered when naming a child - names you’ve loved since childhood, names the father loves, input from family and friends, input from strangers, the surname, family names, names already taken by people in the family, and the list goes on and on! To find a name that both parents love - and the rest of the family at least agrees with - by the time you consider all of those things is a miracle to say the least!

So, let me get this straight. You - I’ll assume your name is [name]Ellen[/name] - have a daughter named [name]Catherine[/name], who has a daughter named [name]Emma[/name] (the baby’s mother), who has a sister with the middle name [name]Jane[/name]. So, [name]Emma[/name] is choosing to name her daughter after two important people in her life - her mother and her sister - to some extent. That truly is lovely, I must say. I was actually going to suggest that [name]Emma[/name] could reverse the name and name her little girl [name]Catherine[/name] [name]Jane[/name] [name]Smith[/name], as [name]Catherine[/name] [name]Smith[/name] is more appealing - at least to me - than [name]Jane[/name] [name]Smith[/name]. But, I sense that [name]Emma[/name] might feel odd about giving her daughter her mother’s first name. Yet, the baby could go by something else - [name]Cate[/name], [name]Catie[/name], [name]Rina[/name], or even [name]Jane[/name]. I happen to know a girl - one of my very close friends - whose name is [name]Catherine[/name]. Her mother, too, is [name]Catherine[/name], and my friend has expressed interest in naming her first daughter [name]Catherine[/name] as well. So, I guess it CAN be done!

[name]EDIT[/name]: YOU [name]SAID[/name] YOU WERE THE GREAT-GRANDMOTHER, SO YOUR DAUGHTER, [name]CATHERINE[/name], IS THE GRANDMOTHER, RIGHT? SO I GOT THIS ALL WRONG! SORRY.

Like you said, sometimes the name you keep coming back to ends up being the one, as if by fate. If that proves true in this situation, then so be it.

[name]Just[/name] one last question. Is [name]Smith[/name] the baby’s father’s name, or is it [name]Emma[/name]'s last name? Has [name]Emma[/name] considered a hyphenated last name for her child(ren)? This could change things around - for the better, in my opinion - considerably.

I’m sorry if these posts are bothersome or nosy. Sometimes I get caught up in a particular situation or thread - or mommy-to-be - for some reason and can’t resist responding, and then I end up monopolizing the thread. So, I apologize for that.

Good luck with this, and keep us all posted. :slight_smile:

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[name]Susan[/name], you’re right that [name]Jane[/name] [name]Smith[/name] could be perceived as very boring, but on the other hand, I think it could also be perceived as the ultimate classic name.

As for [name]Chloe[/name], I don’t think the mother is concerned about other girls named [name]Chloe[/name] [name]Smith[/name], but just that there might (likely?) be other girls in her daughter’s class named [name]Chloe[/name] and her [name]Chloe[/name] would be called “[name]Chloe[/name] S.”

I agree with you that objectively [name]Violet[/name] [name]Jane[/name] [name]Smith[/name] would be the best choice of the three, even with “[name]Letty[/name]” as the nn. [name]Violet[/name] isn’t super popular now like [name]Chloe[/name] (that being the mother’s concern), and most people probably would find [name]Violet[/name] more interesting than [name]Jane[/name] with [name]Smith[/name].

BTW, I notice that in your response and another response [name]Letty[/name] is spelled [name]Lettie[/name]. [name]Do[/name] you have any familiarity with the name? I’ve seen it spelled both ways, but only as [name]Letty[/name] for the 3 young girls called “[name]Violet[/name] ([name]Letty[/name])” whom I’ve come across on the Internet (two of them in the UK). I’ve found references to [name]Lettie[/name] or [name]Letty[/name] as a nickname for [name]Violet[/name] as early as 1750 (VA). (I think that more often [name]Letty[/name]/[name]Lettie[/name] has been a nn for [name]Leticia[/name].) [name]Lettie[/name] as a given name is found in the SSA top 1000 from 1880 to 1945; [name]Letty[/name], only infrequently – 9 times – from 1880-1932. [name]Lettie[/name] ranked as high as 184 in 1881, which happens to be the 2008 rank of [name]Violet[/name], a top 100 name from 1901-1926.

I think [name]Violet[/name] is a fine name with a very positive history – definitely a vintage classic. I just wish my granddaughter loved the name [name]Violet[/name] at least close to her attachment to [name]Jane[/name].

Thanks for your response.[/quote]

Congratulations on your great-granddaughter!

[name]Jane[/name]
I think that in [name]California[/name], where I live, and in places where people tend to be quite flamboyant, [name]Jane[/name] [name]Smith[/name] would seem dull. But in a place like New [name]England[/name], [name]Jane[/name] [name]Smith[/name] would seem classic. I tend to think that I love classic names, but more often than I care to admit, my [name]California[/name] taste takes over! That’s why my name lists are often so quirky.

[name]Chloe[/name]
As for the [name]Chloe[/name] S. quandary, no matter what name you give your child, there could always be another child in their classroom with the same name. That’s how my daughter [name]Laura[/name] became [name]Laura[/name] C. for a while. It was maddening because the other extremely stuck-up [name]Laura[/name] was known as simply “[name]Laura[/name]”. My little [name]Laura[/name] C. was the new kid. They called her [name]Laura[/name] CEE-EEE! She cried a lot that year. The kids were mean in many ways. But [name]Laura[/name] rose to the occasion and was one of the most popular girls in the class by the 6th grade. By the way, the other [name]Laura[/name]'s last name initial was “W”, so [name]Laura[/name] C. called her “Dubs” after Dubya. Along with the majority of the children in the school, the girl came from a family of Democrats, so the name “Dubs” was an insult.

[name]Violet[/name]
I don’t know why I put [name]Lettie[/name] as opposed to [name]Letty[/name]. [name]Both[/name] names are listed and favored on Nameberry. I think I prefer [name]Lettie[/name] because to me, it looks less like the word “let” and more like a fun little nickname.

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That’s a good suggestion but the parents wouldn’t be comfortable with the baby not having her father’s last name. Hyphenating the mother’s surname with the father’s has been suggested too and contemplated, but again, the parents aren’t comfortable with that.

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I agree with Irisrose. Is it even a possibility that the baby could have the mother’s last name, or both? That way [name]Jane[/name] would be a little less plain. I also have my mother’s last name, and to be honest I don’t understand why a baby should automatically have the father’s last name (or why the woman should automatically take her husband’s name upon marriage, as so many have mentioned in this thread, vis a vis [name]Jane[/name] [name]Smith[/name] only being [name]Jane[/name] [name]Smith[/name] for a short period of time). Anyway maybe [name]Jane[/name] [name]Smith[/name]-… would be an option? I like [name]Jane[/name] because it is simple and elegant but it is rather plain. I know a [name]Jane[/name] with a one syllable last name, and I have to say, her name is really boring… However, if she loves it, she should use it, rather than regret it later. But using the mother’s last name or both mother and father’s last names has my vote.

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That’s a good suggestion but the parents wouldn’t be comfortable with the baby not having her father’s last name. Hyphenating the mother’s surname with the father’s has been suggested too and contemplated, but again, the parents aren’t comfortable with that.[/quote]

What a bummer! Hyphenation seemed like the perfect compromise. I was envisioning it in my head - something like [name]Jane[/name] [name]Catherine[/name] [name]Cooper[/name]-[name]Smith[/name] and perhaps a future little sister, for whom I thought [name]Violet[/name] [name]Emma[/name] would be a cute name. Ha! I know, I’m getting a little TOO into this!

So, I know I’m getting to be a bother throwing out random names left and right, but a thought just struck me. What if [name]Emma[/name]'s daughter was called by two names? I was doing some “research” on Google, and I found [name]Eliza[/name] [name]Jane[/name] [name]Smith[/name] in some genealogy report from around 1875, and I thought to myself, “Wow, [name]Eliza[/name] [name]Jane[/name] as a double name is so cute!” Now, I know double names are not everyone’s cup of tea - and they really aren’t mine - but this idea, especially with a name that rolls off the tongue along the lines of [name]Eliza[/name] [name]Jane[/name], seems pretty good! And, if mommy and daddy - and baby - ever get tired of [name]Eliza[/name] [name]Jane[/name], there are always plain [name]Eliza[/name], plain [name]Jane[/name], or cute nicknames like [name]Elle[/name] or [name]Ellie[/name] to fall back on. Now, I’m generalizing with [name]Eliza[/name], but many names would work…

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[name]Catherine[/name] [name]Jane[/name] [name]Smith[/name] would be nice, but three big problems here:
[name]Emma[/name]'s sister is [name]Catrina[/name] [name]Jane[/name] called [name]Cate[/name], [name]Catie[/name] or [name]Catrina[/name]. (She has 2 other sisters as well, but has always been extremely close to this sister.) [name]Emma[/name] likes the name [name]Cate[/name]/[name]Kate[/name] very much but doesn’t want her daughter to be called the same name as her sister.

[name]Emma[/name] loves [name]Jane[/name]; if she uses the names [name]Jane[/name] and [name]Catherine[/name], [name]Jane[/name] has to be the first name.

If she were to name the baby any other first name with the middle name [name]Jane[/name] and then call her [name]Jane[/name], her daughter would still be known as [name]Jane[/name] [name]Smith[/name]. In that case, she might as well give her [name]Jane[/name] as her first name since that’s less confusing.

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[quote=“ellen_b”]

[name]Catherine[/name] [name]Jane[/name] [name]Smith[/name] would be nice, but three big problems here:
[name]Emma[/name]'s sister is [name]Catrina[/name] [name]Jane[/name] called [name]Cate[/name], [name]Catie[/name] or [name]Catrina[/name]. (She has 2 other sisters as well, but has always been extremely close to this sister.) [name]Emma[/name] likes the name [name]Cate[/name]/[name]Kate[/name] very much but doesn’t want her daughter to be called the same name as her sister.

[name]Emma[/name] loves [name]Jane[/name]; if she uses the names [name]Jane[/name] and [name]Catherine[/name], [name]Jane[/name] has to be the first name.

If she were to name the baby any other first name with the middle name [name]Jane[/name] and then call her [name]Jane[/name], her daughter would still be known as [name]Jane[/name] [name]Smith[/name]. In that case, she might as well give her [name]Jane[/name] as her first name since that’s less confusing.[/quote]

Right - I agree. I’m going to be honest - I hate it when people name their children something and then call them by a middle name. I babysat for an [name]Elijah[/name] [name]Jacob[/name] once, and he was called [name]Jacob[/name] to the point he didn’t even know [name]Elijah[/name] was his name!

So, in addition to my [name]Eliza[/name] [name]Jane[/name] thought - even though [name]Eliza[/name] isn’t ideal with [name]Smith[/name] (but that wasn’t the point of that thought) - I thought that maybe [name]Emma[/name] could call her daughter something like J.J. It’s like [name]Gigi[/name], or some other nickname, but, well, different. I thought that [name]Julia[/name] [name]Jane[/name] [name]Smith[/name] might work in that regard, as it is classic, elegant, not too popular, and sounds gorgeous with [name]Smith[/name]…

[name]Eleanor[/name] [name]Jane[/name] [name]Smith[/name] would also be cute, and it in a way honors Great Grandma [name]Ellen[/name]!

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[name]Lauren[/name], you must be psychic! It’s the baby’s father whose last name is [name]Smith[/name], while [name]Emma[/name]'s last name is… you guessed it (now how did you come up with that?), but let’s not put it all together here.

You’re on target with [name]Eliza[/name] [name]Jane[/name] too. That name has been considered, but [name]Emma[/name] didn’t like the possible shortening to [name]Liza[/name], especially with that name’s association with [name]Liza[/name] Minnelli. [name]Eliza[/name] [name]Jane[/name] combines the middle names of [name]Emma[/name] and her sister, and I thought it could be the perfect name. But the baby’s dad doesn’t especially like [name]Eliza[/name].

Those are good suggestions, but they’ve already nixed the idea of using both last names with a hyphen or of using any double name.

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[quote=“ellen_b”]

[name]Lauren[/name], you must be psychic! It’s the baby’s father whose last name is [name]Smith[/name], while [name]Emma[/name]'s last name is… you guessed it (now how did you come up with that?), but let’s not put it all together here.

You’re on target with [name]Eliza[/name] [name]Jane[/name] too. That name has been considered, but [name]Emma[/name] didn’t like the possible shortening to [name]Liza[/name], especially with that name’s association with [name]Liza[/name] Minnelli. [name]Eliza[/name] [name]Jane[/name] combines the middle names of [name]Emma[/name] and her sister, and I thought it could be the perfect name. But the baby’s dad doesn’t especially like [name]Eliza[/name].

Those are good suggestions, but they’ve already nixed the idea of using both last names with a hyphen or of using any double name.[/quote]

Oh my goodness! You have got to be kidding me. Well, so I don’t write it again, I happened to know someone once in my life who had that last name, but without the hyphen. It was all one name…

Not to mention my good friend [name]Jane[/name], whose last name is Abbottsmith, combined from the last names of two relatives, [name]Abbott[/name] and [name]Smith[/name]. Her middle name is a three-syllable classic as well.

Wow! I would not ever think to shorten [name]Eliza[/name] to [name]Liza[/name]. That is just so, 80s? But, as I said, [name]Eliza[/name] [name]Smith[/name] is pretty S-sound heavy, so maybe it is a good thing daddy doesn’t like it.

In addition to my [name]Eleanor[/name] [name]Jane[/name] [name]Smith[/name] and [name]Julia[/name] [name]Jane[/name] “J.J.” [name]Smith[/name] suggestions, I also think [name]Sarah[/name] [name]Jane[/name] is cute. [name]Sarah[/name] is my twin sister’s name, so I’m partial to it. [name]Sarah[/name] [name]Jane[/name] is a pretty, simple double name, too, and [name]Sarah[/name] has the darling [name]Sadie[/name] nickname. Another I’d suggest is [name]Clara[/name] [name]Jane[/name] - its soft, sweet melody rolls off the tongue, making it an ideal double name candidate. Yet, [name]Clara[/name] is so sophisticated and uncommon in its own right - not to mention you get [name]Clara[/name] from The Nutcracker and [name]Clara[/name] [name]Barton[/name] as excellent associations!

Again, I’m sorry I randomly guessed [name]Emma[/name]'s last name. [name]How[/name] weird!

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[name]Jane[/name] [name]Smith[/name] - we live in the Midwest. I suppose many would see [name]Jane[/name] [name]Smith[/name] as not as exciting as some of the ‘new’, often mispelled, monikers some of the kids have, but I think the name would be respected too. [name]Jane[/name] with any last name would be questionable to some, while I think others would find [name]Jane[/name] quite classy, if a bit bland.

[name]Chloe[/name] - cute story about your daughter and Democrat [name]Laura[/name] Dubs! Good comeback on your daughter’s part! She sounds like a spunky girl with a lot of confidence. My grandson [name]Andrew[/name], age 6, was delighted that there was another [name]Andrew[/name] (a few years older) in his daycamp program last summer. He loved being “[name]Andrew[/name] C.”; it made him feel special while his twin brother remained just [name]James[/name]. I have told this story to [name]Emma[/name], but she continues to prefer that her daughter be the only one in her class each year with whatever name they decide on.

[name]Violet[/name] “[name]Letty[/name]” - [name]Lettie[/name] reminds me of [name]Lettice[/name], a form of [name]Leticia[/name] or vice versa, which of course would remind one of lettuce.

It seems to me that the more one finds out about a name and analyzes it, the more possible detractions to the name one finds! [name]Just[/name] like [name]Jane[/name] [name]Smith[/name]: recently I’ve wondered if we’ve over-analyzed that name. My husband looked puzzled when I asked him his opinion of [name]Jane[/name] [name]Smith[/name]: he likes [name]Jane[/name]; [name]Smith[/name] is the surname; it sounds fine to him.

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Well actually [name]Ellen[/name] is my middle name, and that name is already on hold: [name]Emma[/name]'s oldest sister [name]Sarah[/name] [name]Ellen[/name] announced a few years ago that her daughter will be [name]Elena[/name] [name]Catherine[/name] after both of us and her mother. ([name]Sarah[/name]'s husband prefers [name]Catherine[/name] [name]Elena[/name]. They’re recently married and not planning to have a baby for a couple of years.)

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[quote=“ellen_b”]

Well actually [name]Ellen[/name] is my middle name, and that name is already on hold: [name]Emma[/name]'s oldest sister [name]Sarah[/name] [name]Ellen[/name] announced a few years ago that her daughter will be [name]Elena[/name] [name]Catherine[/name] after both of us and her mother. ([name]Sarah[/name]'s husband prefers [name]Catherine[/name] [name]Elena[/name]. They’re recently married and not planning to have a baby for a couple of years.)[/quote]

Well, I guess that nixes [name]Sarah[/name], too! [name]Elena[/name] [name]Catherine[/name] is absolutely beautiful; I much prefer it to [name]Catherine[/name] [name]Elena[/name]! So lovely. Your family has great names! (It doesn’t bother [name]Emma[/name] that her sister wants her daughter to have the same middle name?)

So, who’s name hasn’t been used as a middle name yet? Has your first name been used? Has [name]Emma[/name]'s mother’s name been used?

Indeed, your family is lucky with names. If I were to name my daughter after my mother (like [name]Emma[/name]'s [name]Catherine[/name]) and my sister’s middle name (like [name]Emma[/name]'s [name]Jane[/name]), I’d end up with [name]Price[/name] [name]Jolene[/name]! Ha! (Wait, is [name]Catherine[/name] [name]Emma[/name]'s mother or grandmother, or both?)

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Combining [name]Smith[/name] with the mother’s surname: I think that may be more common in the UK than here in the US. When I looked for [name]London[/name] Telegraph online birth announcements for parents named [name]Smith[/name], I found that many (most?) of the Smiths had another name attached to that surname.

[name]Eliza[/name] - [name]Emma[/name] wouldn’t have shortened it to [name]Liza[/name], but she was concerned that others might, as in 'liza. I think [name]Eliza[/name] [name]Smith[/name] sounds fine, but not so much [name]Elizabeth[/name] [name]Smith[/name] with the double ‘th’ endings.

You’re really on the same page with [name]Emma[/name]'s list! She considered both [name]Nora[/name] and [name]Clara[/name], as well as [name]Sadie[/name]. All are out of consideration now, and [name]Eleanor[/name] is too close to the ‘reserved’ [name]Elena[/name].

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[quote=“ellen_b”]

Combining [name]Smith[/name] with the mother’s surname: I think that may be more common in the UK than here in the US. When I looked for [name]London[/name] Telegraph online birth announcements for parents named [name]Smith[/name], I found that many (most?) of the Smiths had another name attached to that surname.

[name]Eliza[/name] - [name]Emma[/name] wouldn’t have shortened it to [name]Liza[/name], but she was concerned that others might, as in 'liza. I think [name]Eliza[/name] [name]Smith[/name] sounds fine, but not so much [name]Elizabeth[/name] [name]Smith[/name] with the double ‘th’ endings.

You’re really on the same page with [name]Emma[/name]'s list! She considered both [name]Nora[/name] and [name]Clara[/name], as well as [name]Sadie[/name]. All are out of consideration now, and [name]Eleanor[/name] is too close to the ‘reserved’ [name]Elena[/name].[/quote]

I do live in the US, actually. It would make sense that [name]Eleanor[/name] was kicked off, due to the [name]Elena[/name] situation. [name]Julia[/name]? Wow - I’m really striking out here. These are some that I think are ideal, and I’ll bet you’ll tell me they’ve been considered and rejected or something, too:

[name]Amelia[/name] [name]Jane[/name] [name]Smith[/name] - I really love this one! My pick. :slight_smile:
[name]Celia[/name] [name]Jane[/name] [name]Smith[/name]
[name]Felicity[/name] [name]Jane[/name] [name]Smith[/name]
[name]Louisa[/name] [name]Jane[/name] [name]Smith[/name]
[name]Lucy[/name] [name]Jane[/name] [name]Smith[/name]
[name]Virginia[/name] [name]Jane[/name] [name]Smith[/name] - I know two young people named this…

Off for tonight, but I’ll check back in the morning!

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[name]Lauren[/name], [name]Lucy[/name] [name]Jane[/name] [name]Smith[/name] has been considered and eliminated. There are only 3 names still under consideration, those I listed in my first post, and I think it’s unlikely that any other name will be added to that list. They’ve discussed many names and it’s come down to those three. At this point, they really aren’t open to further suggestions (many of which they’ve already considered anyway). I think either [name]Violet[/name] [name]Jane[/name] [name]Smith[/name] or [name]Jane[/name] [name]Catherine[/name] [name]Smith[/name] will be the name; most likely [name]Chloe[/name] won’t be chosen because of the name’s popularity. Whichever it is, I’m hoping that my granddaughter is really happy with their choice. I appreciate everyone’s thoughts on their naming dilemma.

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I’ve been reading this post with interest, and debated with myself as to whether to comment, but I (obviously) decided to do so. My best friend’s name is [name]Jane[/name] [name]Catherine[/name] [name]Smith[/name]. Her sister’s name is [name]Margaret[/name] [name]Elizabeth[/name] [name]Smith[/name], they’re twins. I’ve known them since I was born (our mothers were in a breast-feeding group together.) and [name]Jane[/name] has hated her name from the time she was about eleven, and [name]Maggie[/name] now goes by [name]Libby[/name] to everyone except those of us who can’t break the habit of calling her [name]Maggie[/name]. I’m sure this has something to do with being twins, each girl wanted to stand out, and sparkle independently, but [name]Jane[/name] in particular takes issue with her name, because she feels like it is a name that’s meant to blend in, not stand out. For a while, she wanted to go by [name]Cat[/name], and then, of course, [name]Maggie[/name] became [name]Libby[/name] and the whole twin thing erupted again!

[name]Jane[/name] and I have talked about her (to me, disproportionate) dislike of her name. She says it makes her feel forgettable, and particularly found this to be so when she was applying for jobs after graduating from university. I asked her (many times) if she would prefer to be called something ridiculous, but memorable, like [name]Sapphira[/name]-[name]Arcadia[/name] (dont’ judge me) and she says no, but she would prefer to be [name]Cordelia[/name]! ([name]Anne[/name] of [name]Green[/name] Gables, never mind.)

Anyway, I don’t know if her story is relevant to yours, but I thought I’d tell it. She’s always the most vocal advocate of names that stand apart from the crowd (without being [name]Saphira[/name]-[name]Arcadia[/name]) for the right reasons whenever our friends have children.

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Please tell [name]Jane[/name] that it is so easy to change her name, at least if she lives in the U.S. I don’t know about other countries. She could just change her name with her friends and acquaintances while keeping [name]Jane[/name] as her legal name. It is a great relief to enjoy my name. I changed it many years ago.

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phia, thanks for sharing how your friend who has the exact name in consideration – [name]Jane[/name] [name]Catherine[/name] [name]Smith[/name] – feels about her name. This is an important consideration of naming that sometimes is overlooked: how the child may feel about her name when she’s older. As best as anyone can, the parents of this baby have tried to factor that into their naming decision with each name under consideration.

I’m guessing that the parents of [name]Jane[/name] and [name]Margaret[/name] “[name]Maggie[/name]” gave them names which they believed were substantial and would serve them well throughout their lives. Yet both [name]Jane[/name] and her sister wanted to change their very classic names to something “different”. I think many girls dislike their name at some point during their growing up years, often as teens, and that this happens far more with girls than with boys. Were [name]Jane[/name] and her sister twin boys named [name]John[/name] [name]Charles[/name] [name]Smith[/name] and [name]Mark[/name] [name]Edward[/name] [name]Smith[/name], it most likely would never have occurred to either of them to want to change their names.

What do you think bothers your friend the most: her name [name]Jane[/name] or [name]Jane[/name] with [name]Smith[/name]? It sounds like she might not have liked being [name]Jane[/name] with any surname. On the other hand, I’m wondering if her most common surname [name]Smith[/name] is as unpleasing to her as is her given name [name]Jane[/name].

[name]Smith[/name] was a given for your friend. (Of course, it didn’t have to be but in this country usually children are given their father’s surname.) And her parents and their taste in names were also a given for her, as is the case for all of us. Parents like [name]Jane[/name]‘s who prefer the most classic of all girls’ names – [name]Jane[/name], [name]Catherine[/name], [name]Margaret[/name], [name]Elizabeth[/name] – just aren’t going to name their daughters frillier, more unusual, ‘standout’, names like [name]Arabella[/name], [name]Ophelia[/name] – or [name]Cordelia[/name].

I’ve heard/read of a few other young women with the name [name]Jane[/name] [name]Smith[/name]. When I asked for nameberry feedback just on the name [name]Jane[/name] [name]Smith[/name] several weeks ago, one poster shared: “I actually know someone named [name]Jane[/name] [name]Smith[/name] and she quite liked her name. To her, it almost seemed like an alias, but in reality there aren’t too many people with the name. My first name is also [name]Jane[/name] and can’t recommend it enough! I love my name! [name]Chloe[/name] is cute, but not nearly as classic as [name]Jane[/name].”

Your friend’s opposite feelings about being [name]Jane[/name] [name]Smith[/name] give me pause. Yet I come back to another very important aspect of naming, finding the name that feels ‘right’ for the parents, as “everwaiteing” so apply stated:

“Before the mother gives up on the name she loves, I think she should think very hard about how she will feel if she compromises. I think she should close her eyes and imagine that she is actually looking into her baby’s eyes and calling her “[name]Letty[/name]” with the knowledge that the baby’s name is [name]Violet[/name]. She could do this for [name]Chloe[/name] “[name]Jane[/name]” too. If she can do this and feel a sense of ownership and comfortableness with the name, then - and only then - should she compromise on the name she loves. Otherwise, I think she will be at high risk for regretting her choice and feel a sense of loss. If she would delight more in [name]Jane[/name] [name]Catherine[/name], she should go with that. [name]Jane[/name] [name]Smith[/name] is not bad. [name]Jane[/name] [name]Catherine[/name] is very pretty!”

Such a dilemma. I remind myself that [name]Jane[/name], no matter the last name, is not, say, [name]Nevaeh[/name], [name]Makayla[/name] or [name]Destiny[/name] (all top 50 names), and wonder why I’m worrying so much about it. The baby’s parents and our entire family think [name]Jane[/name] is a fine name, one of the best, and if that’s her name, I think she’ll be happy with it too.

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Yes, phia, please tell your friend [name]Jane[/name] to consider changing her name, perhaps to [name]Cordelia[/name] [name]Jane[/name] [name]Smith[/name], if she really likes that name. [name]How[/name] awful it must be to go through one’s entire life with a strong dislike for one’s name! I know that I told ellen_b that I sometimes feel a twinge of regret and remorse when I introduce myself (as my name, [name]Lauren[/name] [name]Miller[/name], a name I consider boring, commonplace, and forgettable), but your friend’s situation is obviously more dire! As a twin, I also know what it can be like to go through life trying to outshine a sister - in whatever realm possible. My sister’s name is [name]Sarah[/name] (MN: [name]Price[/name]), and, though common, it is feminine, sweet, simple, and classic, and I love it! My parents also considered [name]Maggie[/name] [name]Simone[/name] for my name, and I sometimes wish they would’ve gone with that - for one, it is a classic and matches my siblings. Two, [name]Maggie[/name] (and [name]Margaret[/name]) are not that common for people in my age group (~20) - I’ve met dozens of [name]Laurens[/name] but just two Maggies. I’ve often felt a sense of jealousy toward my sister’s name, so I sympathize with [name]Jane[/name]'s situation. Please tell her to consider changing it for her own future happiness!

ellen_b, sorry to commandeer your thread like this! If [name]Emma[/name] isn’t open to any other suggestions, then she should just name her daughter [name]Jane[/name]. She loves it, and that is really all it comes down to at the end of the day. I think you once wrote that if the child was named [name]Jane[/name], her name would absolutely be [name]Jane[/name] [name]Catherine[/name]. Perhaps instead of focusing on her first name being [name]Jane[/name], and her name being [name]Jane[/name] [name]Smith[/name], the middle name should be the point of focus. I understand that [name]Emma[/name] loves [name]Jane[/name] [name]Catherine[/name], but her daughter could be given a name with much more melody, in my opinion. This was my initial comment when I first came to the thread - not only is [name]Jane[/name] [name]Smith[/name] weird, [name]Jane[/name] [name]Catherine[/name] [name]Smith[/name] is abrupt and harsh and lacks a feminine, melodic sound. The fact that [name]Emma[/name] loves [name]Jane[/name] is obviously going to outweigh the fact that her last name is [name]Smith[/name], which is completely fine. But, perhaps she could consider other middle names and save [name]Catherine[/name] for a future daughter, should she have one.

Should [name]Emma[/name] be open to this idea - which of course, she doesn’t have to be - I would recommend a four-syllable middle name for [name]Jane[/name] [name]Smith[/name], such as:

[name]Jane[/name] [name]Amelia[/name] [name]Smith[/name]*
[name]Jane[/name] [name]Cecilia[/name] [name]Smith[/name]*
[name]Jane[/name] [name]Cordelia[/name] [name]Smith[/name]
[name]Jane[/name] [name]Dorothea[/name] [name]Smith[/name]
[name]Jane[/name] [name]Felicity[/name] [name]Smith[/name]
[name]Jane[/name] [name]Olivia[/name] [name]Smith[/name]*
[name]Jane[/name] [name]Veronica[/name] [name]Smith[/name]
[name]Jane[/name] [name]Virginia[/name] [name]Smith[/name]

  • marks my favorites ([name]Jane[/name] [name]Cecilia[/name] is my top choice)…

Should [name]Emma[/name] (and the baby’s father) not like any of these, or not like the idea of a four-syllable middle name with greater melody, then I would think that she has made her decision: [name]Jane[/name] [name]Catherine[/name] [name]Smith[/name].

Good luck to you and your family!

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I actually know a guy who was unhappy with having a common full name (and hence my opinion on the common full name issue). I don’t know if he ever did anything about it though (he’s someone I haven’t been in contact with for several years). FYI, this is coming from one of the few males on here.