[name_m]Hi[/name_m] Everyone!
So, this has never happened to me before and I already feel a tremendous amount of guilt but I need help with my baby girl’s name. She is almost 4 weeks tomorrow.
I have always loved the name [name_f]Ava[/name_f] and have had it as a name in my head since my first pregnancy whom that boy is now 12.5. Now that I have had my 6th and last baby, we named her [name_f]Ava[/name_f] [name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f]. [name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f] is my first name and I’m very happy with it as her middle name. [name_f]My[/name_f] husband actually picked her middle name after me and he loves the name [name_f]Ava[/name_f] [name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f] but I’m having a hard time.
I had a very traumatic emergency C-section after I previously had 5 natural. The Surgeon made it clear that one or both of us could have died… She had to come out asap, so my husband couldnt be there and that still tears me apart…
I don’t know if this thinking is because of my postpartum journey and still coping with the birth and delivery and my anxiety and depression bothering me, or if I need to make a name change.
Please no judgement. Thankyou.
[name_f]My[/name_f] 5 other children are as followed
[name_u]Beau[/name_u]
[name_m]Patrick[/name_m] (Pat)
[name_f]Isla[/name_f]
[name_f]Phoebee[/name_f]
[name_m]Theodore[/name_m] (Theo)
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Sorry to hear you had a scary and distressing delivery. Whatever name you choose, I hope you can get some psych help with that (and a good women’s physiotherapist who specialises in post-c-section care at/after 6 weeks - massaging out the bumps in the scar tissue etc). Anyway, back to names:
I think Ava Elizabeth flows beautifully, is sophisticated and classically elegant, and goes with your other names. You haven’t really said what your lingering concerns are? Have you been unsure since naming her? That would make it easier to better gauge whether it’s postpartum hormones and anxiety (with the added pressure of being your final name) or whether you’re genuinely lukewarm about the name now it’s actually time to use it. Hmmm, it is interesting that you’ve liked it for ages but not used it for your other girls. Maybe it’s meant to be an “almost but not quite” name for you?
I’m not sure if other names will help or make things harder (?), but here are some names that I see as close to Ava, and also working with Isla and Phoebe:
Eve Elizabeth (nn Evie - but wouldn’t suggest Evie as first given your other “complete” names)
Evelyn Elizabeth (but I prefer Ava to Eve-lyn pronunciation)
Margot Elizabeth
Anna Elizabeth
Bria Elizabeth
Mia Elizabeth
Violet Elizabeth
Sylvie Elizabeth
Ada Elizabeth
Lara Elizabeth
Audrey Elizabeth
Constance Elizabeth (nn Coco or Tansy)
Camille Elizabeth
Stella Elizabeth
Bridget Elizabeth (nn Birdie)
Rose Elizabeth
Maeve Elizabeth
Clara (Klaa-ra) Elizabeth
Willa Elizabeth
Lucy Elizabeth
Charlotte Elizabeth
Adelaide Elizabeth (nn Daisy)
Zoe Elizabeth (same special meaning as Ava)
There are others like eg Flora and Ivy (but maybe both too close to Isla), Iris (same and also not a great run into Elizabeth), Chloe, Bronte and Daphne (but both probably too close to Phoebe). Hazel suits but not great before Elizabeth with repeat EL.
If you decide to keep Ava, it really is a gorgeous name that will age well too.
I hope this helps - and don’t feel guilty, it’s pretty normal to have doubts about names even without a difficult birth to recover from. My brother changed his son’s name when he was three months old, and it turned out fine! I think he’s been lightly teased about it once or twice in the 14 years since. Also, as my list shows, there is probably more than one very good option (ie none of us get to truly achieve the sole, perfect name)! That’s not to dissuade you, more to take the pressure of perfection off your shoulders. Good luck!
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Oh gosh bless your heart I’m so sorry you had such a traumatic experience with the birth of your latest addition. I wish you all the best with your recovery and healing process 
Having a baby is a lot even under the best of circumstances and I actually think it’s really normal to have name doubts/regret/uncertainty. After I had my girl I had major doubt about her name still at times experience a little uncertainty. However I know that [name_f]Lilia[/name_f] is her name and I’m happy with that choice. To get myself to the point of happiness with my name choice I gave myself some time. I think figuring out your emotions regarding something so huge such as your daughter’s name straight after a traumatic birth is too much. You really need to take some time out ultimately I would say you’ve got 6 months till you can change your child’s name. Babies start recognising their name after 6 months so you do have time to change it. So anyways yes take some time out relax and when you’re feeling more at peace go back to the thinking about her name.
When your ready to go back to thinking about her name I would do the following
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Complete a pros and cons list surrounding [name_f]Ava[/name_f] [name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f] figure out what you love and what your not so sure about regarding the name. Then the things you’re not so sure about figure out whether they are deal breakers or not.
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Take the name out for a test drive go to Starbucks order a coffee using the name [name_f]Ava[/name_f] see how you like how [name_f]Ava[/name_f] feels when you say the name. Call your daughter [name_f]Ava[/name_f] instead of using pet names like ‘honey’ or ‘the baby’ which as parents of a newborn we tend to do. Take joy in introducing [name_f]Ava[/name_f] to people. Continuously saying [name_f]Ava[/name_f] in relation to my daughter really helped me fall completely in love with her name.
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If [name_f]Ava[/name_f] just doesn’t fit test drive out other names for your daughter figure out what works and see if they sound right for her.
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Finally stop giving yourself a hard time you’ve got nothing to feel guilty about naming a child is a tough decision and you’ve been through a tough time. Cut yourself some slack you’ll figure it out 
Personally I think [name_f]Ava[/name_f] [name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f] is beautiful!! She has this old school Hollywood glamour feel. She’s elegant, classic and feels timeless. I think [name_f]Ava[/name_f] [name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f] is beautiful and sounds gorgeous with your other kiddos names.
You’ve had some lovely suggestions so count any repeats as me being in agreement with the berries
[name_u]Beau[/name_u], [name_m]Patrick[/name_m], [name_f]Isla[/name_f], [name_f]Phoebee[/name_f], [name_m]Theodore[/name_m] and…
[name_f]Mara[/name_f] [name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f]
[name_u]Ruby[/name_u] [name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f]
[name_f]Willa[/name_f] [name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f]
[name_f]Audrey[/name_f] [name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f]
[name_f]Eve[/name_f] [name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f]
[name_f]Abigail[/name_f] [name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f]
[name_f]Flora[/name_f] [name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f]
[name_f]Eloise[/name_f] [name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f]
[name_f]Rosalie[/name_f] [name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f]
[name_f]Lola[/name_f] [name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f]
[name_f]Hope[/name_f] this helps
Sorry to hear you had such a hard time 
I hope things feel easier soon.
Objectively, [name_f]Ava[/name_f] [name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f] is a lovely name - it’s bright, solid, versatile, pretty, meaningful and bubbly! It matches with her siblings without being matchy!
Some considerations:
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You’ve loved [name_f]Ava[/name_f] for a long time - it’s not a sudden decision, and in time, with some healing, it might feel like the right one - and you might regret not using it.
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Would you feel okay with giving it a little more time, at least another month, before settling on a name? In that time, you could get used to [name_f]Ava[/name_f], you could try out another name, or, while things settle, switch between [name_f]Ava[/name_f] and a generic nickname (baby girl, little one etc)
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Are there any other names that were on your list, feel right for her, or that you like and could imagine using? Could you trial them out, to see if [name_f]Ava[/name_f] actually feels like her, or if another one is better?
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Would you consider a double middle? So [First] [name_f]Ava[/name_f] [name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f] - just an option
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Would you consider something similar, so that you get the vibes/sounds of [name_f]Ava[/name_f], but something that feels like a new start too? I’m thinking [name_f]Ada[/name_f], [name_f]Eva[/name_f], [name_f]Eve[/name_f], [name_f]Ayla[/name_f], [name_f]Maeve[/name_f], [name_f]May[/name_f], [name_f]Jada[/name_f], [name_f]Maya[/name_f], [name_f]Leia[/name_f], [name_f]Liv[/name_f], [name_f]Mabel[/name_f] etc?
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Would something hopeful/comforting in a name help? Maybe, [name_u]Esme[/name_u] (beloved), [name_f]Liv[/name_f] (life), [name_f]Frida[/name_f] (peace), [name_f]Nadia[/name_f] (hope), [name_f]Hope[/name_f], [name_f]Carys[/name_f] (love), [name_f]Felicity[/name_f] (happiness/good fortune)
Best of luck with finding something that works for you
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I think [name_f]Ava[/name_f] [name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f] is a very pretty combination and matches your other children’s names perfectly. If you have a negative association with it now, what about changing it only slightly to [name_f]Eva[/name_f] since it sounds like you do like the name.
First: I am so sorry your final experience was so traumatic. That makes a lot of things, especially processing other things, hard for a while. Have some grace for yourself. She has a name right now that fits with her sibs perfectly.
Second: Give yourself some space and time before making any major decisions. Name guilt could be all the stuff going on inside you internally or it could be something else.
Three: I hope you have good community around you! If it’s not her name, that can be dealt with but for now it is her name and just take this journey one step at a time.
[name_f]Ava[/name_f] [name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f] is gorgeous, btw. Whatever you choose, you’re her mom and it’ll be a good decision!
Thankyou all so much! It really hdlos to get an outsiders opinion.
I think I have to give myself time as well. I just worry about taking too long and the kids have all been calling her [name_f]Ava[/name_f]. As has everybody else.
You all have given me alot to think about and some good ideas! Keep them coming!
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I had a similar experience with my youngest. We named her and I loved the name and it took 4 days after she was born to come up with the name. Then after it was all settled it just seemed like the name wasn’t hers. For the 1st 3 months of her life I struggled to call her the name we had lovingly choosen for her and that I honestly loved. I called her every other name that we considered sometimes by accident sometimes privately to see if there was a name that suited her better. I wondered if we should call her something else. But then after 3 months it all went away those thoughts and questions. I’ve not thought about it since. I wonder for me if it was just the post partum hormones messing me around a bit and perhaps because we choose a name that is quite ‘grown up’ for a tiny baby. I don’t know what the answer is for you but i thought maybe this might help. All the best!
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Is there another name that you think would fit her better? [name_f]My[/name_f] SIL adopted a little boy that went by M@rk since birth and changed his name when he turned 1 when she officially adopted him. Everyone got used to his new name and we all think it suits him. It’s okay to fall out of love with your long time favourite name!
No, every name I call her besides her actual name to see if it suits her better in private seems to not go right for her… But then i cant get used to Ava… I dont know what to do… I seriously cry over it… One day am i going to have a conversation with her when she’s an adult and maybe she’ll ask about her name and ill have to say I dont like it. That I did at some point but I stopped liking it for her and i didnt know what to do… That’s so unfair to her…
I also selfishly think its unfair to me too.
I am so sorry!!! Naming is so difficult as it is, but adding in all the birth trauma 
Maybe a full name with nickname [name_f]Ava[/name_f] if you really wanted to keep it in there somehow? Could you ask input from your family on other names? A name that came to mind is [name_f]Avonlea[/name_f] (avun-lee). 
Are you religious at all? When I’m stuck at a crossroads and don’t know what to do I pray for guidance and direction in my life.
Another one I came across recently was Avenell which is [name_u]French[/name_u] for oat pasture. Sounds super pretty and could have the nickname [name_f]Ava[/name_f] if you so desired.
[name_f]May[/name_f] I ask what you named her? I completely understand if you dont want to. Im just curious.
Yes we named her [name_f]Evangeline[/name_f]. She mainly goes by [name_f]Evie[/name_f] but i say her full name just because I love it so much and it’s so beautiful.
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I am so sorry for what you’re going through!
I’ll leave here a list of names in case you need some more inspiration to think on. For what it’s worth, [name_f]Ava[/name_f] is a cute name and fits right in with her siblings too! Maybe if it were a nickname, or if she had 2 nicknames to go by, it could make the transition feel more natural…
[name_f]Aveline[/name_f]
[name_f]Aviva[/name_f]
[name_f]Aviana[/name_f]
[name_u]Aria[/name_u]
[name_f]Amara[/name_f]
[name_f]Amina[/name_f]
[name_f]Amy[/name_f]
[name_u]Alma[/name_u]
[name_u]Alba[/name_u]
[name_f]Evaline[/name_f]
[name_f]Evelina[/name_f]
[name_f]Emmaline[/name_f]
[name_u]Esme[/name_u]
[name_f]Elodie[/name_f]
[name_f]Elsa[/name_f]
[name_f]Eliza[/name_f]
[name_f]Clara[/name_f]
[name_u]Cleo[/name_u]
[name_f]Cora[/name_f]
[name_f]Camila[/name_f]
[name_f]Nina[/name_f]
[name_f]Marina[/name_f]
[name_f]Rosie[/name_f]
[name_u]Ruby[/name_u]
[name_f]Vada[/name_f]
[name_f]Vienna[/name_f]
[name_f]Vivienne[/name_f]
[name_f]Jessamine[/name_f]
[name_f]Daphne[/name_f]
[name_f]Daisy[/name_f]
[name_f]Marnie[/name_f]
[name_f]Mindy[/name_f]
[name_f]Mila[/name_f]
[name_f]Stella[/name_f]
[name_f]Summer[/name_f]
[name_f]Lyla[/name_f]
[name_f]Lyra[/name_f]
[name_f]Lydia[/name_f]
[name_f]Libby[/name_f]
[name_f]Ginny[/name_f]
[name_f]Genevieve[/name_f]
