So recently, a close friend of mine told me about the names that her and her fiance plan to use when they have children. To my surprise, their chosen girl’s name is [name_f]Flora[/name_f], one of my favourite names for girls, and now I’m afraid I won’t be able to use it! She doesn’t know how much I love the name [name_f]Flora[/name_f], and how much meaning the name carries for me. As strange as this sounds, it takes me back to memories of my childhood. I believe it will be about 5-6 years before I start having children, and I am worried she will use it before I get the chance.
Should I still consider using [name_f]Flora[/name_f]? Or will it be off limits?
I think let her know that you like the name too. I’m not sure how this should work but I say whoever has a kid first gets to choose lol. Otherwise, you could both have a [name_f]Flora[/name_f]?
[name_f]Do[/name_f] you think it would be bad to use the name after she has already used it? If I talked it over with her and asked her for permission?
When you have a baby, name her the name you and your partner love. You don’t need to ask permission. She doesn’t hold the rights over that name. It doesn’t matter if you and your friend have a child with the same first name. Its not like they will look the same, or have the same middle and last name. Tell your friend you love the name too and would like to use it. Its not a competition to see who gets to use it first. Imagine if you and one of your friends married men with the same first name. That would be okay. Or what if you make a new friend who has a child with the same name as your son or daughter?
What if you have a baby before her and used the name Flora. Then your friend had a baby a year later and also used the name Flora. How would that make you feel? Personally, I would take that as a compliment.
And if she has a baby before you and does use Flora, you may feel differently towards that name when you have a baby.
All the best. (Clara, Laura and Fern are just as beautiful.)
Oh Good [name_m]Lord[/name_m], this bizarre world. No one owns any name and [name_f]Flora[/name_f] belongs to you as much as her. Let there be many Floras! You certainly do not need her blessing, especially as you already loved the name. [name_m]Even[/name_m] if you hadn’t!
You can still use it. Two of my best friends, who are also friends with each other, both have a son named [name_m]Simon[/name_m]. That’s not a problem at all. If you want to name your future daughter [name_f]Flora[/name_f], that’s what you should name her.
I think you have to let her know that you love the name as well. If she’s a good friend, I imagine she’d understand. I was in a similar situation recently, while out with my husband and an old friend of mine and her fiance. I am currently pregnant with a baby girl, and we were talking vaguely about names (hubby and I aren’t sharing til later) and my friend mentioned that they want to name their daughter [name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f], with [name_f]Ellie[/name_f] as a nickname. While we have no interest in [name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f], we have always loved [name_f]Ellie[/name_f] and decided to name our daughter [name_f]Penelope[/name_f], and use [name_f]Ellie[/name_f] as a nickname. I took the opportunity to tell her that [name_f]Ellie[/name_f] is one of our favorites, and on the top of our list as well! Her response was we might have a couple of little [name_f]Ellie[/name_f]'s running around in a few years!! Everyone was happy, no one was offended. My friend isn’t even pregnant yet - I’m not going to NOT use a name I love because she MIGHT have a baby girl one day.
If you don’t want her to feel offended, just mention that [name_f]Flora[/name_f] is a name you have always considered using, that way it was brought up in conversation. Nobody owns a name so it’s okay that she chose it, too. You’re not doing it out of spite someday if you use it!
I agree with those who say you can choose whatever name you want. I would say “I also love that name and have seriously considered using it one day” just so she knows you wouldn’t be copying her idea, and getting it from her.
I would definitely talk it over with her just to let her know that you’ve loved this name for a long time and it holds a special meaning for you, and it was your plan to name your future daughter [name_f]Flora[/name_f], too.
I’m sure she will understand, and she might not even choose [name_f]Flora[/name_f] in the end. Who knows?