My husband is American, I am from Bosnia and a recent immigrant to the US. We gave our firstborn an English name and for our next and probably last child, I want to use a name from my culture.
My husband is struggling with that - he seems to understand my reasons why (honoring family and heritage, especially considering a difficult past with lots of loss of our own cultural identity). But he has trouble warming up to the names I’m suggesting. He says they are unfamiliar and strange sounding to him.
I am wondering how others have navigated, or would navigate this issue. I’m only suggesting names that are easy to spell and pronounce in English. Of a long list of names I proposed, he only liked one ([name_m]Milo[/name_m]), but he mispronounced it (MIE-low instead of MEE-loh), and so I worry whether we will be able to get on the same page namewise.
I am thinking that the middle name can be English to provide a palatable balance for his ears, but other than that I don’t have any ideas on how to get him warmed up to my suggestions.
I like [name_m]Milo[/name_m] pronounced both ways! Pronounced your way it is similar to the girls name [name_f]Mila[/name_f] here (mee-la) so it shouldn’t be too difficult
Thank you for your suggestions. [name_m]Luka[/name_m] and [name_m]Marko[/name_m] are in use in the Balkan, but none of these names are Slavic in origin - they are slavicized versions of Biblical names etc. Otherwise, I’d like [name_m]Luka[/name_m] as I have a soft spot for boy names ending in -a.
So the names on my list are a collection of pre-[name_m]Christian[/name_m] names, and in some cases, names derived from Slavic words - such as [name_m]Milo[/name_m]. I have to say that I’m lukewarm on this one, but I kept it on the list because it’s easy to spell and pronounce in English.
I don’t mind correcting people once on the pronunciation, but am not sure how I would feel about having a MIE-low if that’s the more intuitive pronunciation for native English speakers… I fear that may water down the home reference even more. I’d rather find a name that’s pronounced the same way in Bosnian/Croatian as in English.
In the same vein, I hesitate with [name_u]Elias[/name_u] or [name_m]Ilias[/name_m]… which is a Hebrew name, but on my list because it’s a family name. I’m not sure about it as a first name (lukewarm again)… but husband would also pronounce it Ee-LIE-as and that LIE in the middle of the name ruins it for me.
Maybe a foreign name with an English nickname could work?
For example, a quick search of “Bosnia popular names” gave me the name [name_m]Harun[/name_m], which could easily have the nickname [name_m]Harry[/name_m], [name_m]Matej[/name_m] “[name_m]Matt[/name_m]”, Josip “[name_m]Joe[/name_m]”, [name_m]Jakov[/name_m] “[name_m]Jake[/name_m]”, Andrej “[name_u]Andy[/name_u]”, [name_u]Nikola[/name_u] “[name_u]Nick[/name_u]”
Alternatively, you could use an English name with a nickname from your culture. [name_m]Anthony[/name_m] “Ante” for example.
I also like [name_m]Aldin[/name_m] and Alen since they sound like [name_m]Alvin[/name_m] and [name_m]Alan[/name_m], both familiar names.
Noo thank you!! I really appreciate any input! Bosnia is made up of different ethnicities which all have their own name groups… plus, many of today’s popular names are [name_m]Saint[/name_m] names, which makes it hard to tell sometimes what the originally “Slavic” names are. Thanks again
I have a few names with the first syllable Vid- or [name_m]Ved[/name_m]- on my short list. In fact, they are my personal front runners right now due to meaning (“to see” as well as “to know”). Husband has not warmed up them yet, unfortunately…
Svarog I find a bit clunky in an English context, although I keep going back and forth on it. Perun is on my list, but not sure about it. I still really like Veles, but it’s prob too controversial to use…
My son suggested to name the baby Veo. (I like it!!) It actually means “veil” in Bosnian… ok but I’m thinking it could be a nickname for many of the Ve- names on my list. Easy enough to pronounce in either language!!
I’m thinking many of the M- names would work easily in an English context (such as [name_m]Milo[/name_m], [name_u]Milan[/name_u], Miro, etc) but I’m sort of lukewarm on those…
One month later, intense research and sorting on my part, I just presented the updated, narrowed down, simplified list to my husband - and he STILL isn’t having ANY of the names!!!
We are now at an impasse. I mean, he’s not even really suggesting names, and unwilling to consider names he hasn’t heard before.
The names he’s suggested before we’re [name_m]Phineas[/name_m], [name_u]Phoenix[/name_u], [name_u]Alex[/name_u], [name_m]Felix[/name_m], and he brought [name_m]Arrow[/name_m] back up, which I suggested years ago for a possible girl.
I am now opposed to using two word names as first names, I’m finding it takes away from the individual names and makes them sound “lower class” overall… sort of like all those Kardashian kids.
[name_u]Alex[/name_u] and [name_m]Felix[/name_m] are no-goes, but I’d be fine having [name_m]Felix[/name_m] as a middle but he’s not willing to consider that either.
I would push for a name from your culture more. It may sound unfamiliar, even weird, now, but your husband should think long term. Besides, kids these days have a much more diverse set of names than 30 years ago.
Everyone in my family was a bit surprised with my newborn cousin’s name - it was an excessively vintage choice - a month later it was the most normal name in the world for my family. [name_m]Just[/name_m] an example
Another suggestion is to use a cultural/ethnic name with a more American/English nickname. Good luck!
What about a name that’s familiar in both English and Slavic languages? Many of those would sound cool and exotic on an American kid, but are still not totally unheard of, and would be a nice nod to your heritage.
Examples that spring to mind are names like [name_m]Ivan[/name_m], [name_m]Lev[/name_m], [name_m]Alexei[/name_m], [name_m]Nikolai[/name_m]/[name_u]Niko[/name_u], [name_u]Milan[/name_u], [name_m]Roman[/name_m], [name_m]Anatole[/name_m], [name_m]Pavel[/name_m], [name_m]Feodor[/name_m], [name_m]Luka[/name_m], [name_m]Valentin[/name_m], [name_m]Viktor[/name_m], [name_m]Maxim[/name_m], [name_m]Kasper[/name_m]… but you’ll have a better idea than me which of those cross-over style names most appeal to you.
Popped in to add a couple, sorry it’s from a search around online ‘Slavic names’. But I noticed they hadn’t been mentioned. (Sorry if any of these aren’t correct, I would hate to trust just a quick search online to find the correct origin). I found a few that that could have a more traditionally English sounding nicknames.
I have to just say I love the name [name_m]Milo[/name_m] too!
[name_m]Lazlo[/name_m] or [name_m]Laszlo[/name_m]- I feel like it fits the popular trends of names like [name_m]Ezra[/name_m] and the Z and X’s in names.
[name_m]Brodny[/name_m]- Similar to [name_m]Brody[/name_m]
[name_u]Florian[/name_u]- nn [name_u]Ryan[/name_u]
[name_m]Kasimir[/name_m]- nn Kas
Rorik- nn [name_u]Rory[/name_u]
Zarek- nn [name_m]Zak[/name_m]
[name_f]Zora[/name_f]
I can sympathize with both of you. You because you have moved to the US and want to preserve your culture and he because he might worry about how a Bosnian name might work in the US.
However it works, both members of the couple need to really like the name used, I believe. It doesn’t seem OK to choose a name the other person dislikes. Maybe if he were given a long list of names from this culture he might have more of a sense of ownership of his names.
Although I wouldn’t like it if my husband insisted on only an Irish name. I would feel limited.
Thank you; your post made me go back to my longlist and reconsider a few options I had previously discarded.
I have now added [name_m]Luka[/name_m] back into the mix.
[name_m]Ivan[/name_m] is a family name, but it’s pronounced EE-vahn and I think many people would get that wrong.
I have now added the “top” names on post its onto our fridge and invited my husband to add his own or move them around. Now my names are mixed in with his names, which I think immediately makes them feel less foreign.
I really don’t think Miro or [name_m]Luka[/name_m] sound foreign at all! He did ask where [name_m]Milo[/name_m] was, but again, he pronounced it MIE-low, not MEE-lo, which is why I sorted that one out.
I’m hoping that with this visual fridge technique, we can keep working on the name without “having to talk about it”, which has been hard to achieve so far. Plus, the daily visual exposure to the names might also help make them more familiar to him over time.
Ok I’m going to try some Slavic names that I feel could work quite well in [name_u]North[/name_u] [name_u]America[/name_u]. I as well, know very little about Bosnia or Slavic names, so forgive me if these are off.
