This is true I shouldn’t stereotype lol. Mine are absolutely fearless so no doubt they’ll have some great adventures. I think boys are harder to keep alive too lmao. Mine are fearless stunt boys.
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Awww, I hadn’t thought about that. Let me add it to my list of things to fear about the future. Because to be honest, my sisters and I are very attached to our mom. As adults we act as a group of friends, and I want that for me!
Let us be positive and imagine a future where their spouses become bonus-kids and not the other way around.
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Mine are only 5 and 3, it’s all good 
Same! 
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My relationship with my mom and sister is the main thing that makes me wish for a daughter.
I know I can/will hopefully always have a close relationship with my sons too. It’s just going to be different. 
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My lack of a relationship with my mom has made me want a daughter. So I guess there are all sorts of reasons. I bonded with my sons when they were born very much, but being female I want that female-female relationship that I don’t have (we’re estranged) and I want to be a better mother and give her what I didn’t have. I don’t know if that’s right or wrong, but right after she was born, I was sitting in the hospital alone with her (I did the birth solo since we had no one to look after the other children) and thinking that once upon a time my own mother had held me as a newborn. It was a very surreal experience considering how badly that played out and there was this moment of “I will do better.” I had that when the boys were born, but it hit harder with my daughter than with my sons.
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Both my sister and I left home at a young age and have settled in a different country. [name_f]My[/name_f] brother is the one who still lives at home. So there’s hope yet, ladies!!
So many good points above have given me things to think about. Such beautiful sentiments, and so much sense brought forth. I can’t imagine getting to the state of mind where disappointment would be any more than fleeting, but arguments on both sides of the coin are valid.
I still think I land in the 20-week camp, but I suppose only time ever tells.
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Really interesting points made by everybody.
I would say impatience is one of my negative traits and wanting to be organised and prepared is part of my character. This is why I found out the gender with my pregnancies. Plus my first was 2 at the time so I wanted him to be able to bond with his sibling, by knowing what the gender was and refering to the baby as little brother.
I won’t be TTC until late next summer but I have already gone through my baby clothes that I already had stored, separated them into boys and unisex. I already have a lot of the baby things stored, like the bouncer and [name_m]Moses[/name_m] basket etc so there wouldn’t really be any purpose for me finding out the gender other than sheer curiosity because I’ve got all my baby bits. ( Other than girlie newborn clothes as such)
I think I would either therefore
- Not find out the gender (although it would kill me lol) the anticipation. I would have the reassurance in the back of my mind that I have all that I need etc.
- Find out the gender with the expectation of thinking it’ll be a boy ( if they tell us the baby is a girl, it will be a genuine surprise) as I’ll just have it in my head that I’m having a boy.
I absolutely agree with you that any gender disappointment is fleeting. It’s exactly that. I think it’s only natural to want the experience of having a daughter but certainly when you get that baby in your arms after the intensity of labour you are often overwhelmed with joy and love anyway, I should think I’m probably putting unnecessary pressure on myself thinking that a girl would be the dream as she would have two older brothers to take care of her and I would have a daughter.
I think I’m rambling now but for me it’s a good few months off yet anyway 
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I have a similar sort of relationship with my mum. Some parts of my childhood were quite neglectful on her part.
It sounds like you will have a strong bond with your daughter and all your children as a result.
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When my mum married, my step dad already had two children who are both boys then he had a child with my mum and that was a girl. Me and my half sister are five years apart and it is the same with my step brother as we are the same age, my younger step brother is three years older then my half sister. So my mum already had a girl but my step dad only had boys.
[name_f]My[/name_f] wife has four older brothers and is the only girl out of her siblings. Their ages are 38, 35, 33, 30 and 29.
Also, a bit of the opposite but my step brother has two daughters and a son, ages 4, 2 and 7 months.
I feel you there, my oldest looks similar to me and that’s it. The other 3 are the perfect combo between us two.
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@anon25197097 - I am a mom of 2 boys and my third is a girl. I was in a very similar boat as you as I very much wanted a daughter but also knew I would fiercely love another boy as well. I was pretty convinced that I was destined to be a boy mom. We had a boy name picked and had a really hard time settling on a girls name. First thing, I was willing to try a couple things a little differently than I had with my boys to up our chances of a girl. I was a temperature tracker and tracked my cycles very closely while ttc because I have PCOS and very long cycles. With both of our boys we conceived on ovulation day. With our daughter we conceived 3 days prior to ovulation day. Boy sperm is faster and doesn’t live as long as girl sperm so if you BD on ovulation day you are more likely to conceive a boy. But BD a few days prior and then not again you have a higher chance of conceiving a girl. Second thing, I couldn’t wait until birth to find out the gender of our daughter. I found out at the anatomy scan with both of our boys and needed to with our third as well. I will admit I had a little bit of gender disappointment when I found out our second was a boy because at the time my husband wanted to be done with two kids. It was super short lived and I am so lucky to have my second boy. He is the funniest and sweetest little boy. I was convinced at the ultrasound that it was another boy. The tech and the doctor confirmed very quickly they knew the gender and it was the same way with our boys so I figured they had to have seen a penis. Regardless I wouldn’t have decided to wait until birth if baby had been another boy. I am a planner and need to know to plan for everything.
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