C Section & Induction Questions

Parentberries
1

I am starting to be open to the idea of child birth, but I think a c-section would be the deal breaker unless there is away I can be knocked out instead of awake. I have read that in most cases they want you awake, but I don’t think I could handle being awake. When I got my wisdom teeth removed I didn’t even give the dentist a chance to ask, I firmly said I want to be asleep. I remember being in the room and I was nervous, sweating, and they almost thought they couldn’t do the process since my blood pressure had risen. The dentist assumed it was just nerves and had the assistant give me the anesthesia. The last thing I remember them saying was that my blood pressure was going down and I was good to go, then I woke up and it was over. And that was just getting teeth pulled! (I have an extreme fear of surgery by the way, just thinking about the body getting cut open makes me feel sick.)

I’m assuming I could demand to be asleep, but I want to know if there is some law or something where they won’t let you unless it’s an emergency because if there is, I think me giving birth is out of the question. Please don’t give me the “you can’t see it” spiel, I know I can’t see it, but just knowing is enough to make me sick and freak out. I’m also thinking that they’ll probably put me to sleep just because I’d be freaking out, but I really don’t want to embarrass myself either…

Also I hear how a lot of people get inductions if they’re past their due date. Is it necessary because I hear those have a higher risk of a c-section. I would like to lower my chances, but I’m wondering if I can refuse an induction or if it’s bad for the baby if I don’t get one. I was born a week late and my mom didn’t have an induction, so I’m assuming it would be alright to wait a week. (Please don’t tell me to just go natural, because I am getting an epidural no matter what, my body can’t handle pain and I’d rather be in a hospital in case anything does go wrong, like I start bleeding to death)

I think I might be borderline tokophobic…

Please answer the questions! Don’t tell me that I’m young and get over it, I just want answers! Thanks you.

2

Why are you afraid of childbirth? Not being snarky here, just wondering about why you are anxious. Hugs.

3

Sorry, nook cut me off. Wondering why you are anxious so maybe you can prepare the best you can for the big day.

4

If you for some reason have a scheduled c-sec then you’ll have the chance to your doctor. If it is emergency, just shut your mouth and hope the best for your baby. The c-section isn’t about your fears, it’s about getting the baby out safely. This major surgery is performed if there is a baby in danger or other serious issue. It can’t be compared to dental work (its normal to sleep through that). I think if you’re ever pregnant you’ll feel completely different. You’ll find strength you never had. [name]One[/name], because your hormones and adrenaline won’t give you much choice and two because a little life is dependent on you. If you throw a fit about being knocked out and delay it and as a result your child dies, was it really worth it?

Regardless, don’t worry about a c-sec because in most cases they are not necessary anyways, like I said only in an emergency. To reduce the chance of having an unnecessary c-sec and therefore not have to worry about this or the complications that result to you and your baby, go with a midwife or hire a doula :slight_smile: same goes with inductions. If you go w/ an OB or hospital than your chance of being induced or have a c-sec will increase greatly. I think you should read [name]Ina[/name] [name]May[/name] Gaskin’s book, it is very informative about how to avoid inductions and c-sections. Wether you go w/ an OB, midwife, home birth whatever, there is great information in there for all pregnant women to educate themselves with. Her book also covers the different forms of pain relief medication and anesthesia used during c-sec and why some are not popular or no longer used (including being put out).

I also feel as you get older and ready to have kids your opinions will change greatly. I used to think the same thing as you (not kidding), I am STILL terrified of needles and am looking forward to labor and delivery. We are going to a birth center because I don’t want to be strapped to a bed, fed with needles, not allowed to eat, drink or pee on my own and have a needle in my spine. ICK. I am not afraid of the pain because I know I am not being injured, nothing is wrong with me, it’s a completely natural process and most of all, it cannot last forever. My mantra is “this is temporary”.

5

It’s not just childbirth, it’s surgery in general. If I can be guaranteed a vaginal birth, then I’d be more okay with it since I can always get an epidural, but since I can’t… it makes me more iffy.

I have an extreme fear of like everything. I’m very pessimistic and timid. If my fiance’ comes home late, I’m panicking because he was hit by a car. He’s learned to text me if he’s going to be late. [name]Just[/name] seeing a scary/horror movie commercial causes me to have nightmares.

I hate that about me, but I can’t help it. I am still afraid of storms because I’m afraid a tornado will just appear out of nowhere even though I know it won’t. It’s like after watching Jaws, I stayed up all night with the light on, and told myself over and over again, I’m in a bed, there is no water, there is no shark. I still couldn’t sleep! I stayed up all night trying to force myself to realize there is no way a shark can get me when I’m nowhere near the ocean… the shark is also fake! I refuse watch that movie again.

I also have a really low pain tolerance. I throw up just from period cramps. I have to overdose on painkillers, because 6 pills is not enough for the 24 hours of pain I am in. So the pain of childbirth makes me nervous, but the body doesn’t remember pain and as I mentioned, there is the epidural.

Where these fears came from, I have no idea.

6

You make it sound like I’ll be making a scene on purpose. I don’t want to, as I said, because it would be embarrassing, but knowing me and my fears, if they don’t knock me out, I will be panicking like I did in the dentist chair except probably worse because I know I’ll be being cut open and it if they want my child to be alright, then they might as well knock me out before doing the procedure before risking the fact that my blood pressure might rise, would you rather have me die instead?

A fear isn’t something you can just rid of like that. I hate how people say face your fears. I fear storms and still do! I have no choice but to face them, but I’m still scared of them! Also just because it’s temporary for you, doesn’t guarantee that it will be for me. And if I get pregnant and I still have these fears, then the only option is abortion, and that’s murder, so I’ll be stuck in a traumatic situation, which could risk my relationship with the child and father.

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I agree with tinabina in that you’d probably want to work with a midwife first and foremost. I’ve been seeing one since we moved out of [name]Texas[/name] and I think I’d use her if we have another child. I also will be in a hospital though :). I like the security I feel in a hospital and I’ve had two great experiences with the nurses and doctors. Also, epidurals and I were BFFs both deliveries.

I loved my OB, but C-sections were talked about during the pregnancy, for various reasons. It scared the $*%& out of me. Really. I had a similar reaction when I had my wisdom teeth pulled. No BP problems, but it caused me a good deal of anxiety. When I got to the end of my pregnancy, I kept telling myself that if a c-section had to happen then I would go with the flow for baby. It wasn’t easy to think that, but putting baby first in my mind helped ease some of my anxiety. I didn’t end up with a c-section, but that was because my doctor and the nurses worked with me to get [name]Arabella[/name] out. It wasn’t easy (she was face up and we needed her to roll over-not as easy as you’d think), but if you have a great team, it makes a big difference.

Inductions are scary territory. I wouldn’t recommend it to anyone unless you felt 100% comfortable that you would be successful. I had one, but I was already mostly effaced and 4cm dilated. I’m surprised my little boy didn’t just fall out, but ya know, that’s a whole other thing :). My sister on the other hand wasn’t ready for labor at all (no dilation and very little effaced) and ended up in an emergency c-section. This was about 7 weeks before I had mine and that’s why I really had to be confident to say ok to my own.

As for demanding to be knocked out, I really don’t know how that would work out. I think I brought it up during my first pregnancy and the doc told me that it would have to be a major emergency where I wouldn’t have time to get the local anesthesia (epidural, spinal, w/e).

I would tell you to not worry about it so much because the worst things that can happen to you rarely happen, but I know that it won’t help. It didn’t for me. This is something that you’re going to really have to research. Go see different doctors, midwives, and the like to see how the caregivers in your area handle these situations. Find out all of your options. You might even talk to someone about your fear of surgery. It really does change things once you’re finally pregnant, but if you can’t get past your fears of the endpoint enough to get pregnant in the first place, then I think you need to get the info and see how you feel afterwards.

All of that being said, I feel for you. A lot. It’s really scary to think about a c-section even when you aren’t pregnant. I know you’ll figure this out :). I hope you get a lot of great advice from this thread and can find the best course of action for yourself. I’d love to have another little [name]Luna[/name] or [name]Ezra[/name] running around this world (two names I thoroughly love)! Good luck!

8

Thanks! I figured I’d have to talk to a doctor, but I’m just nervous about telling them my fear of surgery because I feel like they’d make it seem like no big deal since they’re used to it, so I’m worried they wouldn’t understand just how scared I really am. I also feel embarrassed about being afraid of this stuff since a lot of people aren’t. I honestly have no idea why. I never had surgery that I can remember. I was ran over when I was 1 year old, but I doubt that’s the reason I’m terrified of surgery since I have no memory of that whatsoever.

I know being asleep is normally not recommended because it’s bad for the child, but I also know it can be potentially dangerous for me since I now know my blood pressure will rise when I’m scared. I’m wondering if they’ll take that into account and decide it’s better for me to be out.

9

I think you’re being dramatic now lol. You clearly stated in this post that you will freak out so I was clearly stating is it worth delaying surgery and causing death? Point is: it’s worth getting a hold of yourself and to not be selfish in that situation and chances are your maternal instinct will kick in and you will be ok. There is always a risk to surgery and if you are sleeping the risk [name]WILL[/name] increase. [name]Don[/name]'t worry about dying. You need to learn to calm down down, maybe there are bigger anxiety issues here that can help you deal with these problems. I was trying to explain to you how I can relate because a lot of the things you say remind me of myself from a while back. Life happens wether you want it to or not and you have no choice but to deal with it or be a brat and make it worse for yourself and everyone else. If you feel like childbirth will be so traumatic & that it will ruin your relationship with your child and the father (lol) then don’t have kids but as I’ve said, as you get older and closer to that point in your life I am SURE it’ll have the opposite effect. If you are at risk of post pardum depression your doctors and family will be on the look out, you’re never alone. You are your own worst enemy Catloverd. Fear is completely controllable. It’s all in your mind and you are the only one who can control your mind. I told you about my extreme fear of needles as one example. I would hyperventilate, pretty much have an out of body experience and throw fits, shake, convulse, cry without control etc… it was scary for me and people around me. Then life happened and sometimes you have no choice but to deal with it. I’ve been in an emergency situation and required stitches without full anesthetic, I’ve broken my femur and had to leave it broken, without pain relief for a week and then had to go through 8 months of intense painful physical therapy. You know what? It’s all OVER, it ended, the pain was all temporary. I have had PTSD from some of these traumatic events but you can get over anything as long as you allow yourself to so that’s why I say you are your own worst enemy. If you give yourself the knowledge and empowerment to take control of yourself, you will do just fine and be so much happier.

And as I mentioned to you before… read the book by [name]Ina[/name] [name]May[/name] Gaskin! I swear it’ll help your fears should you ever decide to have children.

10

Catlover, you do know that to have a c-sec you have an epidural right? So either way it’s the pain relief you want and if you have BP issues I doubt they’ll have you sleep, they’ll keep you as alert as possible to lower the risk. [name]How[/name] are you imagining they do it? And don’t be embarrassed about sharing your fears w/ a doc or midwife. They are used to hearing it all the time. The best thing you can do is share everything you can so they can do their best to make you feel better. If they don’t you’re seeing the wrong person. Only choose a OB or mw etc who makes you feel at ease and understands your needs.

11

[name]Hi[/name] Catloverd.

I know you probably don’t want my opinion, but this sounds like an anxiety disorder to me. It could be an easy fix if you have a vitamin imbalance (such as vitamin D or B complex) or thyroid issue that is throwing off your body. You might need counseling to address irrational fears that are effecting your life. Normal pain (like menstrual pain) can be made worse by anxiety. [name]Ina[/name] [name]May[/name] Gaskin says that anxiety can slow down labor, which can force the induction issue, which can mean that they will have to do a C section after the baby’s heart rate drops after giving you all the drugs to move labor along. The best thing you can do if you want to avoid a C section is to become an expert at relaxation and calming fears.

When you go to the doctor for anxiety they will probably do a blood test to check your vitamin level and your thyroid. Then they’ll try to put you on anti depressants or something similar, which won’t help you calm the irrational fears naturally. Antidepressants are obviously controversial during pregnancy, so it’s best if you can calm your nerves naturally. If you want I can suggest books for you to read about fear and anxiety. Or you could just see a counselor.

12

I don’t believe in fear being controllable as I have already said. I’ve tried it and I can’t get over it. Storms are the perfect example. I have spent almost 22 years trying to get over that fear and yet I still am afraid of them. As I mentioned with Jaws. I stayed up ALL night trying to get over it. There’s more to it than just being in my head. If that was the case, I could get over these fears, but I can’t. I have tried. And when you are afraid, you can’t get a hold of yourself. Panicking isn’t something you can easily just tell yourself to stop, your heart’s racing and adrenaline is pumping. And sure life happens, but I can at least I can decide if I want to give birth or if I want to adopt instead. Also, since I am so scared, I am EXTREMELY cautious. I have never broken a bone or had any serious injury, except for the one I mentioned that happened when I was 1 year old.

Like I said, pain isn’t something that would prevent me from having birth, it’s the surgery part that will.

13

That’s interesting, but I have had these fears for since I can remember. I would assume a doctor would have noticed the imbalance when I was a kid… I’ve also had a blood test done before and it was never mentioned then. I guess they could not have been looking for it… that might be something to look into.

14

Hugs, catlover, I have known many wonderful people irl with major anxiety disorders. Many have had many breakthroughs through therapy, medications, diet and lifestyle chances, and just not being afraid to talk about their anxiety. Hormonal changes as you reach puberty can make changes happen as well as past events that you may not even remember from early on in childhood. While I myself am no medical professional, I have done many years of reading and research on pregnancy, birth, and post partum changes in women (not to mention having several children myself and being surrounded for over 10 years of many different mamas) so while I am not a dr persay, I believe I can see that you need some help. Talking about it and admitting this is a problem to yourself is the first step in seeking help. It is not desirable (I will not say “normal” or not, as there is a wide range of “normal” in personality types etc, and I really do not like the “normal” label anyways!) to feel on edge all the time, nor is it to fear what may happen in any given day. Anybody who has not had these feelings of anxiety can easily say “Oh, get over it, things will be fine”, but in reality, things are not fine in the mind of the person experiencing it…much like depression and other mental health disorders that need attention. [name]Do[/name] not feel shameful or like you are “wrong” in feeling this way, mental heath is just as much needing of attention as physical health. If a person was having chest pains they would go to their dr, not just “get over it”, they would want to get it checked out and so this is why I feel that you are doing the right thing is realizing something needs to change and you need a way to feel better. I hope this makes sense. Mental health problems are very very very real and often times brushed off as " a person just being weird" or something. Try telling my grandfather who was just in the ER for blood pressure issues to “get over it, you are being weird and creating drama”, kwim?

Becoming a mother is going to be a big change, and I feel that it would be in the best interest of your baby and yourself if you seek medical help for this anxiety disorder now. Post partum hormones can make even the most relaxed person feel helpless, and I would hate to see any mama go through post partum depression/anxiety especially as a first time mama, especially seeing first hand through friends how horrible those first months/years of their child/rens lives were on them and that they are not anything that can be taken back or relived. Hugs.

Now the “birthy” person in me, education and surrounding yourself with people who believe in a womans power in birth is key. Things certainly do happen, emergancies certainly do happen, and because of these things though you do not need to fear that they will happen to you because while they may, they also may not. Hiring a doula really ups your chance of having a vaginal birth. With or without an epidural, its proven over and over again a doula is a wonderful way to help you and your partner during the labor process. Please do not listen to horror stories people tell you either, if you are already anxious and somebody tries to tell you “this really bad thing happened to me…” please tell them kindly that you do not need to hear it. Bad things happen and sadly, bad outcomes happen but that doesnt mean you need to surround yourself with those mindsets right now.

If you want to send me a private message, I would be happy to talk with you. As I feel taking care of the whole mother, body and mind is very important during pregnancy and during post partum. Your provider should be taking your anxiety issues into consideration as well, and if he/she is not maybe you might think about changing providers. Much love to you during this sensitive time.

15

All the more reason to seek professional help because they ARE controllable! Let go of the negative train of thought and empower yourself. Sometimes we need help to learn how strong we really are.

16

Catloverd, I feel for you. I’ve had those same feelings, extreme fear and anxiety (and my pain threshold is non existent too) and I eventually got a diagnosis and help a few years ago, and things got much better. I’m still freaking out a little about giving birth, but it really helps to, well, get help. If you want to talk, I’m here. hugs