There’s a lot of talk on NB about people using the SAME name as someone close to them, but how about names that are just close? What would you avoid?
Alliteration? Similar sounds? Would you be as strict for cousins as for siblings? This, I’m sure, depends how close you are, but for the sake of argument let’s say you and your sibling see each other at least every year or so, and your respective children will be familiar with one another if not spending a lot of time together.
[name]Just[/name] for the sake of argument, here are some easy familiar names:
What would or wouldn’t be too close?
Would you use [name]Jemima[/name] with a [name]Jennifer[/name] already in the family? Genevieve? Janelle? Where’s the line?
Can [name]Amanda[/name] have a cousin named [name]Amara[/name] without anyone thinking twice about it? Amy? Anaya? Miranda?
[name]Will[/name] grandma think you chose [name]Sosie[/name] just because [name]Sophie[/name] was already “taken?” What about Ophelia?
Emma: Emily, Emmeline, Gemma?
Violet: Viola, Violaine, Vivan, Victoria, or even other plant names like Rose, Clover, or names that mean Violet like Fiala, Ianthe, Iola, Yolanda?
Obviously I’m unsettled on this, but growing up my brother had essentially the same name as one of our cousins. Think [name]Brian[/name] and [name]Bryan[/name]. They were always [name]Bryan[/name] Lastname and [name]Brian[/name] Surname at family gatherings, or “little [name]Bryan[/name]” and “big [name]Brian[/name]” (they’re about 10 years apart in age). My aunt asked my mom’s permission to use the name, and mom had no issue with it, so [name]Bryan[/name] #2 he was.
Now, I only have one niece (one more on the way!) so I’m starting to look at my list differently. Most of my names are conflict-free, but many of them have similar sounds or, to the uninformed ear, may even sound like the “exoticizing” of my niece’s name (think [name]Natalie[/name] vs. [name]Nayeli[/name]). Some favorites have been knocked down the list due to similarities, but I’m guessing that I’m more hung up on this than most people.
I’m not sure if this really applies but I have always loved the name [name]Mikhail[/name] for a boy. DH has a neice whose name is Mickaela so he won’t even consider it. I however, feel that since we only see her once every 5 years it would be fine.
I think if you don’t see them often it’s okay if they have a similar/same name. My SO loves [name]Jason[/name] but spelled [name]Jasen[/name]. I have a much older cousin named [name]Jason[/name] that I see every 2-3 years so I don’t see an issue. But my younger sister loves [name]Matthew[/name] and our future kiddos will probably see a lot of each other so I can’t use [name]Matthew[/name] but I do like [name]Mateo[/name]/[name]Matteo[/name] and [name]Matthias[/name] but they would probably be regulated to a middle name since they are variations of [name]Matthew[/name].
This is why I’m iffy on using the name [name]Flora[/name], thankfully [name]Luna[/name] is my favorite and [name]Flora[/name] will only be used if we have twin girls, that way it doesn’t appear as if I copied my sister in law’s daughter’s name, [name]Nora[/name].
My nephew’s name is [name]Ezekiel[/name] and my son’s name is [name]Ezra[/name], they see each other every day and are constantly being asked if they were named after each other (they’re twelve days apart.)
Cousins don’t bother me. A lot of my cousins have the same names, most of them named after deceased relatives, so when someone died, the next batch of kids all were named the same thing (which is why there are eight girls named [name]Ines[/name] in my family.) It never interfered with our lives, even when we had the same last names. I wouldn’t deter from naming my child something just because my niece or nephew has it already.
I have a niece named [name]Kaitlyn[/name] and she has a 2nd cousin named [name]Caitlin[/name]! They don’t see each other very often but the connection is there.
I think even copying the first 3 letters is too much for siblings.
For cousins, it entirely depends on the relationship.
If you only see each other once a year I wouldn’t even consider it.
If you see each other several times a year–like 3-7–then it would definitely be a consideration, especially if you’re close to your siblings. Facebooking/emailing all the time, b/c then it would get confusing.
If you see each other regularly, like once a month or more, then I’d probably follow the same rule as for siblings–if 3 first letters match it’s a no. So no, [name]Amara[/name] and [name]Amanda[/name], but [name]Amanda[/name] and [name]Annmarie[/name] would be fine.
Again, all this depends on 1) how much you love the name and 2) how much it bothers you (and your sibling) if their names are similar.
I think it comes down to what everyone is going to be called. If you have [name]Amanda[/name] (nn [name]Mandy[/name]) and [name]Amara[/name] (nn [name]Ama[/name]) and I wouldn’t worry about [name]Mandy[/name] and [name]Ama[/name] being too close.
However, if you are in love with [name]Elizabeth[/name] and your sister already used it for her daughter (and it’s a family name) I’d talk to her about it and see if you can come up with a different nn for your daughter. (It would probably help if they didn’t have the same ln as well).