I have names on my list that DH and I love and would have no issue saying what feels like 500 times a day while our child is small and then saying it for the rest of their lives. None of the names are embarrassing either. However I can’t imagine our parents saying them. They both know our favorites and routinely pull faces or suggest “better” names. I can see all too well “Yes, you heard correctly. His middle name is [name_m]Rune[/name_m]/Tadgh.” or “I said [name_f]Elodie[/name_f], not [name_f]Melody[/name_f].”
Did anyone else struggle with this? [name_m]How[/name_m] did you deal with with it?
A lot of the names we like I can’t imagine our family or parents calling the child that, but ultimately I don’t think it’s a big deal. It will become normal once the kid is here, and it’s a possibility that grandparents will have nicknames or pet names for the little ones anyway I wouldn’t let it ever deter me from using a name I loved.
Yes I had this issue when trying to find names when I was expecting. My parents and brother could be ruthless. My mother called me and said she couldn’t sleep at night thinking of us naming our child [name_f]Josephine[/name_f]. and my mom is a sweet lady the vast majority of times. I know it can be so hurtful
I don’t have any ideas for how to deal with it. I can say that if you love the names you should stick with them. If you still love the names after hearing a lot of negative stuff then all the more reason to use them (of course in my opinion this applies to legit names which are spelled correctly and gender appropriate, where the issue is purely taste based).
The vast majority of people will let it go when the baby is born and named. My mom tells us now what a handsome name We chose and she regrets trying to deter us. It still irks me though cause I felt iffy on using the name knowing in the back of my mind my family didn’t like it. My brother still says he thinks [name_m]Edmund[/name_m] is a stupid name (18 months later).
You can’t control people’s thoughts and comments. You either don’t tell people the name until birth (which is just not possible for some of us that like feedback) or accept that some people are going to be negative and rude (unfortunately).
This is really hard. I casually dropped a couple of my favorite names the other day–[name_f]Evangeline[/name_f] and [name_f]Agnes[/name_f]–and my sister went into spasms over how horrible they are, and to pleeeeasssseee not subject her niece to either. I’m beginning to come to the serious conclusion of not discussing my babies names with anyone (except possibly my best friend) and having them find out with the rest of the world what the babies are called.
My in laws don’t like anything that isn’t a family name. I’m sick of hearing the same 10 names recycled over and over. Yet with their youngest they gave him one family name, one not. All the others have two family names. [name_f]MIL[/name_f] said [name_m]Isaac[/name_m] was atrocious and [name_m]Ethan[/name_m] wasn’t usable either. She repeatedly suggests [name_m]Harry[/name_m] or [name_m]Anthony[/name_m] and [name_f]Ophelia[/name_f]. I don’t see it as fair as she’s named eight of her own children.
My mother finds a way to make everything into a teaseable nickname. My mom suggests [name_m]Anthony[/name_m] as well but DH and I don’t like it. And she wants a granddaughter named after her.
I don’t want to share anything with either family when we do have kids for but DH is big about sharing EVERYTHING with his family. I feel like its a no-win situation.
For like the first month after my daughter was born, my dad didn’t call her by her name. He would say, “[name_m]Hi[/name_m] baby”. I don’t know if he did it on purpose or he didn’t realize what he was doing, but after I told him, " Her name is [name_f]Noemi[/name_f]" he started calling her by her name. Whenever people ask my mom what [name_f]Noemi[/name_f]'s middle name is, she just says its a Mexican name. My grandma once told someone the baby’s middle name is X. I think it just takes them awhile to get used to calling the baby by a certain name, especially if it is uncommon.
I’m with you on this. My mom has a weird accent/slight speech impediment or something. I’m not really sure what’s up with her, honestly. But she has a really hard time sometimes saying even very common names. It’s like she just can’t work her mouth around them. Perhaps it’s a genuine neurological problem, perhaps she’s just annoying. I’d vote for the latter. I’m completely intolerant of it. So I cringe to think how she’ll end up pronouncing whatever name we choose.
I learned pretty quickly not to share names with her before hand. She made faces about each and every one of them.
I learned the hard way that my sister, whom I love dearly, is far too opinionated when it comes to names. Names that were mentioned, even in passing, were quickly shot down by her with some “off-the-wall” justification or pure ridicule. I’ve made the decision not to share the name we’ve chosen until the baby is born. If it’s a name you and your DH both like, I say you use it! People are far less likely to voice negative opinions when there’s a face associated with a name. Good luck!
I think everyone goes through this to some extent. Not everyone is going to love your name choice and family tend to feel like they have the right to voice their opinions… Loudly. I chose my daughter’s name but my parents thought it was a bit too complex for a little girl, so we came up with an adorable nickname that she will probably even use in school. We do use her full name as well and some of my husband’s family prefer the more formal name. Anyway, a nickname may allow you use a name you love even if some family members don’t think it’s a feasible choice.
P.S. Edolie is adorable and much trendier than [name_f]Melody[/name_f]
[name_u]True[/name_u]. I just see our parents being particularly opinionated. We’re still at least three years from having kids and they regularly ask and “suggest” names. I’m rather sick of it. The more they toss out names the less I want to use them. [name_m]Even[/name_m] if it was a name I liked lest they named my child.
I wouldn’t let it ever deter me from using a name I loved.