Difficult Surname combo and stubborn husband! Help?

I am not a mum yet but my husband (to be) and I are going to start trying as soon as he has finished his postgrad, and probably before we get married.

We have our hearts set on a girl’s name but for a boy we have reached an impasse!

He is taking my last name (rock the boat), but my last name ends in a Y, and all the names we BOTH like also end in a Y or an IE, so it doesn’t really sound right. His last name is awful to spell and pronounce so we’ve decided not to use his.

But the ones I am in love with, he hates! And he won’t budge - even though he usually ends up loving my ideas that he originally hates - which is why I am still determined to convince him.

My favourite name is [name_u]Dexter[/name_u], but obviously he thinks that’s nerdy, or associated with the TV serial killer. Personally I think by the time any son of ours is school age, that association will have dwindled - what are your opinions?!

Common names are off the menu - [name_m]Fed[/name_m] up of having to distinguish our friends by surnames!

We also both love [name_u]Francis[/name_u] but we don’t like [name_m]Frank[/name_m] and i’d prefer the I shorten it to [name_f]France[/name_f]… Any opinions on that, too?

I also like the names [name_m]Casper[/name_m], and [name_m]Jasper[/name_m], but we’re both pale and [name_m]Casper[/name_m] is a prerequisite for bullying, or is it?! Would [name_m]Casper[/name_m] the ghost have faded into distant memories by then? [name_m]Jasper[/name_m] is nice, but it has faint gothic connotations and shortening is awkward. What do people think?

Also, wild card here: Foxer. Is that even a name? I can see it shortened to [name_m]Fox[/name_m], but is it too American-ish? (We live in the UK)

Thanks for opinions! Would love to hear other suggestions!

I love [name_u]Dexter[/name_u] too. I’ve heard of several baby Dexters recently, so I think you are right that it is losing those associations. Since you’re not there yet, keep it on the list, maybe it’ll grow on him by then.

I also like [name_u]Francis[/name_u], but I’m not such a fan of [name_f]France[/name_f]. I know of one older woman called [name_f]France[/name_f], not sure if it’s short for [name_f]Frances[/name_f] or not. I’d keep [name_u]Francis[/name_u] as a middle name personally.

[name_m]Casper[/name_m] and [name_m]Jasper[/name_m] are both great. [name_m]Jasper[/name_m] is my favorite. Not a lot of nickname options but [name_m]Cas[/name_m]/Caz and [name_m]Jas[/name_m]/[name_u]Jaz[/name_u] work.

Not a fan of Foxer, sorry. I like [name_m]Fox[/name_m] in the right combo though.

I like [name_u]Dexter[/name_u], but my favorite is [name_m]Jasper[/name_m].