Hello all!
My husband and I have FINALLY decided on names for our twins coming this fall. (Six names are not easy to come up with!) Their names will be:
[name_m]Miles[/name_m] [name_m]Henry[/name_m] [name_m]Graham[/name_m] and [name_m]Gabriel[/name_m] [name_m]Calvin[/name_m] [name_m]Pierce[/name_m]
What I’m wondering now is whether or not we should reveal these choices to our family. We haven’t told ANYONE yet, the two of us and everybody on Nameberry are the only ones that know. On one hand, I don’t want to get mixed or negative reactions that might make us change our minds. We both love these names and it has been a long process to get to them.
On the other hand, we have almost 4 months left until the twins are born and it’s hard to keep it a secret. Plus, [name_m]Henry[/name_m] and [name_m]Calvin[/name_m] are family names. It feels almost wrong to NOT tell the [name_m]Henry[/name_m] and [name_m]Calvin[/name_m] that are family what the twin’s names will be.
Does anyone have good or bad experiences with telling family before the birth? Thanks in advance!
We told understanding that not everyone would approve.
I absolutely [name_u]LOVE[/name_u] your final choices!! I got feedback from very close family and friends during the process but did not make a final decision until I met my son, so did not get feedback on my final decision. [name_m]Just[/name_m] knowing how long it took and how much thought you have put into coming up with the perfect names, I would not tell anyone! Everyone’s tastes are so different (and some have terrible taste) that it could be confusing to get feedback at this point and make you start rethinking things (which I don’t think you should!
You could always tell [name_m]Henry[/name_m] & [name_m]Calvin[/name_m] that their names will be used as middle names without telling anyone the full names. I love your choices - congrats!
I think wait till after they are born , your choices are gorgeous but its very possible that you’ll have the babies and change your mind on both or worse one of them which could cause heartbreak and or family issues.
I’m going to vote “no” on this one.
The biggest reason is this: once the boys are named, they’re named. Done. No one can try to talk you out of your choices.
If you reveal the names early, that opens the [name_f]Pandora[/name_f]'s box of people saying, “Why would you choose that? Why are you honoring this person and not that one? I hate that name. I knew somebody who had that name, and he was such a jerk. Why are you using three names–aren’t two enough? Blah…blah…blah…” I say keep it quiet until they’re born, and once the ink is dry on the birth certificate, shout their names from the rooftops. There are just too many tactless people in the world. Because it took you so long to come up with the names you now love, don’t risk having to go back to square one.
Also, enjoy the surprise factor there. My husband and I had a VERY difficult time getting pregnant–extreme and expensive intervention was required. For various reasons, we couldn’t keep it a secret that we were pregnant from [name_u]Day[/name_u] 1. We decided to find out our son’s gender because I am a total type-A planner,but we kept his name secret until he was born. There are so few surprises in today’s world, and it was the one thing we could wait to share. I live in the South and my poor mother was chomping at the bit to monogram everything she could get her hands on, but she just had to wait. We’re expecting our second son in [name_u]November[/name_u] and will probably not share his name either. Of course, to share it, we’d have to know it, and we’re totally stuck.
Please don’t tell! You’ll be devastated if someone says something negative about that beautiful names. I know it’s 4 months to wait and keep it a surprise, but, really, it’s ONLY 4 months. It’s really not that long. Please don’t tell anyone yet, for your own sake!
[name_m]Don[/name_m]'t tell.
It only takes one questionable look to crush you. It doesn’t even have to be spoken words.
When we were trying to come up with our short list I mentioned in a conversation with my Mom one of the names we were considering, at the time one of our favourites. I put in the mix of a bunch of other non contenders and she zoned in on it and told me a bunch of reasons why we really shouldn’t pick that particular name. That’s how I remember it. Her story is likely that she talked about a few of the names and gave her opinion on each. I only remember her trashing the name we really liked.
I think people want to be helpful and feel like they had a little input - but sometimes it’s just not helpful.
Keep the names to yourselves. If everyone knows you are expecting 2 little boys their names are going to be a nice surprise for everyone.
I agree with PPs.
My husband and I have discussed names with family members both times and whilst it is nice to have some feedback there is always negative feedback from someone on any name we suggest.
My dad, for instance is completely stuck in the 80s/90s, which is when he named his own children. My brother will find issue with any name (eg. our latest choice Emre sounds like sting-ray). And my in laws will only consider Turkish names or
come up with really over the top Muslim name suggestions with no regard for where we currently live.
In the end we’ve had to go for what we like but that’s not that easy especially when it’s your first.
I liked [name_m]Isaac[/name_m] and [name_m]Zak[/name_m] for my first. My dad and brother felt [name_m]Isaac[/name_m] was ‘too whimpy’ and my dad called [name_m]Zak[/name_m] ‘too American’. Fast forward 2 years and he now says that he loves the name [name_m]Zak[/name_m]. I think that once people see/hear a name on a child their opinions usually change for the better especially if it’s family and so naturally they grow to love the child.
In summary: your name choices are great, don’t let anyone make you second guess them
I agree with pp that you shouldn’t tell. You will DEFINITELY hear negative feedback, even if people don’t mean it seriously. My in-laws all made jokes about the name choices of another family member and while they truly were just joking, when the kid came out, its parents had chosen something else entirely. Also people are touchy. If 2 family members are being honored, someone else will want in on that and feel offended for not being included. We waited to reveal both gender & name of our little one and yes, it is hard to keep the secret, but having a nickname can help (ex: [name_m]Bean[/name_m] 1 and [name_m]Bean[/name_m] 2 for twins). If you always call them [name_m]Bean[/name_m], you will be less likely to let [name_m]Miles[/name_m] or [name_m]Gabriel[/name_m] slip.
Wonderful name choices! [name_m]Miles[/name_m] [name_m]Henry[/name_m] [name_m]Graham[/name_m] and [name_m]Gabriel[/name_m] [name_m]Calvin[/name_m] [name_m]Pierce[/name_m] are great combos and they go so well together, imo.
I would keep it a secret. Negative opinions are not fun, and I think it’s easier to avoid them if you tell your family the names as they are gazing down at the new little boys. Then they will see the names on the child and not just hear them. I hope I make sense:)
Also, I wouldn’t worry about not telling the honor names. It will be kind of a neat surprise when you do tell.
[name_m]Don[/name_m]'t tell. It will be fun for you to announce the names when they are born and a nice surprise for friends and family. I actually prefer to wait to hear from family and friends until after babies are born as otherwise, if names have been revealed earlier, all that anyone doesn’t know is the birth weight and that’s not very exciting news.
Thank you guys SO much for your advice! We will be keeping it a secret I guess!
Im gonna vote no. [name_f]Lovely[/name_f] classic names.