Due in TWO days and still don't have a name

General Name Discussion
1

I posted before about being 38 weeks and not having a name. We don’t know the sex, but we finally picked out a boys name {[name_m]Ezra[/name_m]}. We want something unpopular {[name_m]Ezra[/name_m] is at #441, with only 86 births here in [name_f]England[/name_f]}. My due date is the 9th, which is in two days, and we still haven’t got a girls name. What if this baby is a girl? We don’t have an attachment to any girls names, and my boyfriend and I have very different styles {it took us nearly the whole pregnancy to get to [name_m]Ezra[/name_m]}. He says he likes “classic” names, but whenever I suggest any {he refuses to make any of his own suggestions}, he says they’re too “old fashioned”. So I tried out names like [name_f]Chloe[/name_f]/[name_f]Mia[/name_f]/[name_f]Ella[/name_f], which are all very popular and slightly trendy and modern here, and he liked them. I guess his style is more different from mine than I thought. We’ve looked through baby name books, but he just doesn’t seem to care and rejects literally every name that I like. I wanted to name a daughter after a scientist that I admire {[name_f]Rosalind[/name_f] [name_m]Franklin[/name_m]}, but he hates science and the name [name_f]Rosalind[/name_f] so that wouldn’t work, and he hates my previous top girls name {[name_f]Viola[/name_f]}.

What do we do? It’s making me panic that my baby might be born and not have a name for several days - I want to be able to announce it to my parents and his parents, who will be outside my hospital room whilst I give birth. I want to be able to invite them in and say “this is our daughter, we named her _____”. They’re already confused that my due date is so soon and we still don’t have a girls name, I can’t imagine how they’d react if we had a girl and she didn’t have a name.

I’m starting to be unsure of Ezra, too. The more I hear it, the more I dislike it. It’s the only name we agree on so I feel like I have to use it, but I keep hearing it and I’m just getting sick of it. And I’m not sure if I can see myself with an Ezra. I guarantee if I use Ezra, I’ll regret it almost straight away.

I just really don’t know what to do. I need to find a name that I LOVE, because otherwise I’ll just regret it.

I’m not looking for suggestions, more advice, because I find that it’s hard to make a connection with a suggested name. I need to hear it somewhere else but I only have two days until my EDD so that might not even happen. I just don’t know what to do.

2

Well if you like [name_m]Ezra[/name_m] why not go with [name_f]Esther[/name_f], she was an amazingly strong and beautiful woman.

rollo

3

I’ve never really liked the sound of [name_f]Esther[/name_f]. And if we have a girl, we’ll probably save [name_m]Ezra[/name_m] for a future son, so I wouldn’t want to use something so similar now.

4

[name_f]Eleanor[/name_f]
[name_f]Helen[/name_f]
[name_f]Phoebe[/name_f]
[name_f]Gemma[/name_f]
[name_f]Gia[/name_f]/[name_f]Gianna[/name_f]
[name_f]Juliet[/name_f]
[name_f]Violet[/name_f]
[name_f]Fiona[/name_f]
[name_f]Naomi[/name_f]
[name_f]Daphne[/name_f]

5

I love [name_f]Laurel[/name_f] and I think that she would make a perfect sister for [name_m]Ezra[/name_m].

rollo

6

What about [name_f]Emilia[/name_f], [name_f]Adelaide[/name_f] or [name_f]Amelia[/name_f]?

7

[name_m]How[/name_m] about [name_f]Lorelei[/name_f], [name_f]Isadora[/name_f], [name_f]Minnie[/name_f], [name_f]Clover[/name_f], [name_f]Flora[/name_f], [name_f]Penelope[/name_f], [name_u]Juniper[/name_u], [name_f]Miriam[/name_f], [name_f]Mariel[/name_f], Menorah or [name_f]Clementine[/name_f]?

8

I’m looking for advice more than suggestions. It’s hard for me to connect with random names in a list, but thank you.

9

Have you considered just taking a break from names? Meet your baby first and then decide. If you’re this torn and unsure about names it might help to wait. I think you’ll be able to visualize better what the name would look like on your baby when you’re actually holding the baby in your arms. I don’t think there’s any rush in picking a name right away if it’s upsetting you this much. I think it’s more important to have a name you love than to announce a name to your family after you deliver.

10

We don’t have time to take a break :confused: At my hospital, you have to have a name before you leave. And if I have a natural birth, I’ll be in the hospital for maybe just one day. And I’d feel horrible if my baby didn’t have a name for a while. I feel like a name is such a pivotal part of your identity and not having a name… I’d hate to just refer to my baby with pronouns for days while we decide. It just doesn’t feel right to me. Plus, it’s normal in my area to pick out a name in advance, and people already think it’s weird that I don’t have a name. I’ve had people who want to get a “congratulations” card, but we don’t have a name for them to write in it. I need to have a name prior to the birth.

11

[name_m]How[/name_m] about going back through your threads and making a list of names that you like, you don’t have to love them, but pick out the ones you like at first glance. Give the list to your boyfriend and have him rank the names and see what you come up with.

Are there any girl names you love, but can’t use for some reason? Try to figure out what it is about that name that you love. Style? Origin? Length? # Syllables? Ending?

12

I’m so sorry you have to go throuh this. I wouldn’t rush into a decision though. You can call The baby “sweety” “little one” or whatever for a few days. [name_m]Don[/name_m]'t let others pressure you into making a fast decision. It’s better to have a child that has no Name for a few days than to have a child with a Name for his whole life you don’t like.

13

Sorry, I sent it too early. Also i think [name_m]Ezra[/name_m] is a great Name for a boy and a man. To find a Name for a girl i’d go through nameberry, look at many lists that fit your style, maybe let your boyfriend do The same, go through The birth announcements, go through TV shows Characters and write down [name_f]Every[/name_f] single Name you Kind of like. Than go through it again. Maybe you’ll find The one.

14

It feels impersonal to not have a name though.

15

Anyone else have any advice?

16

Edited for privacy.

17

Have you tried meditation? Relax, get comfortable, clear your mind, imagine you’re at a park, sitting on a blanket under an old oak tree on clear spring day. Children are playing in the distance as you feel the warmth of sunshine on your face. A boy and girl run toward you yelling ‘Mom’–their names are…

18

I might start a new thread for that. The only thing would be that my boyfriend and I have very different interests and an important meaning to one wouldn’t be important to the other - he likes sports and music, I like science, literature, and movies. I guess I’ll try, hopefully meaning isn’t as important to him. I just really want a classic/vintage name, but he doesn’t like them.

19

Is your picky boyfriend actually contributing to suggesting names, or does he only veto names you like or say “something like __” or “not like ___”?

Could he produce his own list of, say, 20 names when he’s on his own, then you make a list of 20 names, and cross-reference them? He picks 10 from your list, you pick 10 from his. If he likes something like [name_f]Mia[/name_f], then perhaps there is a classic/vintage name like [name_f]Amelia[/name_f] (probably too popular, but just as an example) that would give the nn [name_f]Mia[/name_f]? Then perhaps this will get you down to a list of 3-4 to take to the hospital.

I would also offer the suggestion of leaving hobbies and interests out of it. When hobbies and interests can lead to a name, that’s fantastic, but that seems to be a roadblock for you two instead of a source of inspiration. At the end of the day, he will need to remember that you are naming an individual who may not like any of the things he (or you) like. Perhaps you can also compromise. If he doesn’t like the name [name_f]Rosalind[/name_f], maybe he likes something similar like [name_f]Rosa[/name_f], and maybe just as a middle name. Then you can still tell your daughter that her mn [name_f]Rosa[/name_f] comes from [name_f]Rosalind[/name_f] [name_m]Franklin[/name_m].

There is also the site Nymbler - Your Personal Baby Name Assistant that lets you type in names you like, and it gives you other names you might also like. You can put in both parents’ choices and see what it comes up with.

For what it’s worth, I think [name_m]Ezra[/name_m] is a fantastic name.

I hope this helps.

20

Oh, [name_m]Ezra[/name_m]'s a great name!

As far as girls, I love the idea of cross-referencing his likes with yours. [name_f]Mia[/name_f] and [name_f]Amelia[/name_f] is great, [name_f]Mia[/name_f] can be short for [name_f]Maria[/name_f] (I love it, and it’s [name_f]Marie[/name_f] Curie’s given name), [name_f]Ella[/name_f] and [name_f]Elinor[/name_f] (Dashwood, say), etc.
If he likes [name_f]Mia[/name_f], would he like [name_f]Thea[/name_f]?

You could search Wikipedia lists of female scientists, or authors, etc. The common names have some pretty fantastic namesakes–[name_f]Emily[/name_f] [name_m]Dickinson[/name_m], [name_f]Ella[/name_f] [name_m]Fitzgerald[/name_m],
And maybe search the musicians too, because he might be able to be talked into something that way. [name_f]Etta[/name_f] ([name_u]James[/name_u]), [name_f]Alice[/name_f] (in Chains), [name_f]Corinne[/name_f] ([name_u]Bailey[/name_u] [name_u]Rae[/name_u]), [name_f]Emiliana[/name_f] (Torrini), [name_f]Imogen[/name_f] (Heap), [name_f]Joy[/name_f] (Division), [name_f]Norah[/name_f] ([name_m]Jones[/name_m]), etc.

For boys [name_m]Cole[/name_m] ([name_u]Porter[/name_u]), [name_u]Dean[/name_u] ([name_m]Martin[/name_m]), [name_m]Hugo[/name_m] (Winterhalter), [name_u]Perry[/name_u] ([name_u]Como[/name_u]), etc.

If any name seems kind of okay, go searching for neat people with the same name. It can be a sort of fun game–“Hey look, baby, another [name_f]Lucy[/name_f] wrote this book!” (But don’t let yourself be dissuaded by people with the same name who did bad things.) “[name_f]Maria[/name_f] + scientist” is how I rediscovered [name_f]Marie[/name_f] Curie’s given first name.
[name_f]Eva[/name_f]
[name_f]Lily[/name_f] or [name_f]Lillian[/name_f]
[name_f]Sadie[/name_f] or [name_f]Sarah[/name_f]
[name_f]Lucy[/name_f] or [name_f]Lucia[/name_f]
[name_f]Ada[/name_f] (I say [name_m]Add[/name_m]-ah)
[name_f]Caroline[/name_f]
[name_f]Louisa[/name_f]
[name_f]Ivy[/name_f]
[name_u]Josie[/name_u] or [name_f]Josephine[/name_f]
[name_f]Mae[/name_f]
[name_u]Ruby[/name_u]
[name_u]Vivian[/name_u]
[name_f]Celia[/name_f] or [name_f]Cecily[/name_f]
[name_f]Adele[/name_f]
[name_f]Audrey[/name_f]
[name_f]Eliza[/name_f]
[name_f]Isadora[/name_f]
[name_f]Jane[/name_f]
[name_f]Juliet[/name_f] or [name_f]Julia[/name_f] or [name_f]Juliana[/name_f]
[name_f]Stella[/name_f] or [name_f]Estelle[/name_f]

And if baby lacks a name for a bit, don’t think of it as impersonal. Think of it as the gift of their name matters so much to you that you took your time to find just the right one.