My husband and I love [name_m]Caspian[/name_m] for our baby boy (due in four weeks). He will join big brother [name_m]Leo[/name_m] ([name_m]Caspian[/name_m] [name_u]Michael[/name_u] and [name_m]Leo[/name_m] [name_m]Pawel[/name_m], middle names after my dad and husband, respectively).
But I am struggling with the fact that my parents and sister, who I am very close with, dislike the name. My dad said it was “a sissy name” and will “get him made fun of.” Parents and sister and brother-in-law have said that if we name him [name_m]Caspian[/name_m] they will call him [name_m]Ian[/name_m]. I guess this is fine, [name_m]Ian[/name_m] is not a name we particularly love, but ok. I suspect that the other side of the family will hate the name even more, since they are even more traditional and thought even [name_m]Leo[/name_m] was an unusual choice! But I don’t care as much about their opinion
Some of the other names we’ve been considering, which my family likes better, are [name_u]Owen[/name_u], [name_m]Rafael[/name_m], [name_m]Ronan[/name_m], [name_u]Roan[/name_u], [name_m]Jasper[/name_m], [name_m]Emil[/name_m], [name_m]Miles[/name_m], [name_u]Milan[/name_u]. I guess these just don’t excite me the way [name_m]Caspian[/name_m] does. What would you do? I love my family and want them to like his name, and I also worry that their reservations about the name might have some truth in them (they are making me insecure, basically). Oh and husband does not care one bit about what other people think, ha.
Haha love this - But I don’t care as much about their opinion (I feel the same way)
I think [name_m]Caspian[/name_m] and [name_m]Leo[/name_m] are a fantastic brother set. [name_m]Caspian[/name_m] is a wonderful name, we have it on our list too. My husband and I decided we won’t share our names until the baby is born and here she/he is, you know? This is his/her name and we love it and we’re excited about it. I hope that they just kind of keep their opinions to themselves and see the baby with the name. I’m really sorry you’re going through this. Give it time they’ll come around when they see that baby [name_m]Caspian[/name_m]. [name_m]Don[/name_m]'t give up on the one name that you feel is the one. Good luck!
I love [name_m]Caspian[/name_m]. And I think that if it’s what YOU love. Then name your son just that. And I would stand firm by the name, and remind the family you did not name him [name_m]Ian[/name_m]. That is NOT his name, or nickname. My mother named my brother [name_m]Dayne[/name_m], before there was a [name_u]Dane[/name_u] Cook, ect. And family hated it until they meet him and realized there was no other name they could ever see him with. They got the chance to name their children, now, this is YOURS ! GL! ((hugs))
[name_m]Caspian[/name_m] is such a beautiful name and if you feel that there is no other name you can go with - then use it! It obviously means a lot to you to use it and once baby is born they’ll probably forget all about the name! A friend named her children [name_f]Nieve[/name_f] and [name_f]Keelan[/name_f], which at first her family hated but once babies were born - they completely retracted and fell in love with with the babies rather than the name! Good luck - they are a wonderful sibset
Are you comfortable taking a stand in general, about other issues? If you can handle some confrontation, not only would I name the baby [name_m]Caspian[/name_m], i’d insist that people call him the name that i chose, not a nickname that i don’t specifically ok. It’s your kid, and they have no right to mess with this choice for you.
I want to say, stand up for yourself and the choices you make for your family. But i also understand that that can be difficult, it has a lot to do with personality and history - so i also wouldn’t blame you for wanting to avoid conflict. Think about how you can or should react if you stick with [name_m]Caspian[/name_m] and get attitude for it. What will they say and how can you respond? For starters, I’d stop discussing the matter with them at all until after the baby is born and has been officially named, regardless of how you decide to proceed. But after that point, it’s mostly a matter of repetition: “We chose [name_m]Caspian[/name_m] for reasons that matter to us. Call him [name_m]Caspian[/name_m], not [name_m]Ted[/name_m] or [name_m]Junior[/name_m] or whatever. He’s my kid, and DH and I decided this together. [name_m]How[/name_m] would you like it if i gave you this kind of attitude over a personal choice?” Eventually you will wear them down.
If your DH is ready to back you up on this, then you’ve got a head start on doing your own thing. If, at the end of the day, you decide that you just can’t deal, then go back to the drawing board - but don’t tell your family what you pick until it’s too late for them to mess with your confidence!
Wow, this is all such wonderful advice and encouragement, thank you!
We never told anyone the name of our first until he was born for the reasons some of you mentioned, and I regret discussing it this time, but it was so much harder to pick a name so that’s why we sought others’ advice.
It is also fascinating how the name choosing process can become so much more than the name itself. In my life I’ve struggled with not standing up for what I believe, avoiding conflict and caring too much about what others think. In addition I’ve struggled with forming my own identity separate of my family of origin. But in recent years I feel I’ve grown so much stronger, and choosing this name feels like a reflection of that. It has the potential to be an empowering act for my husband and I, which makes me more inclined to do it. It is unusual for my family and I to disagree since we generally get along so well and have similar views, so this has thrown me for a loop. My husband on the other hand is very used to disagreeing with his family, so this is nothing to him, and I deeply admire his independent ways.
I feel your pain. I love [name_u]Cassidy[/name_u] for a boy, but it seems like no-one else I’ve asked does! But, it doesn’t stop me loving the name, and I may use it someday (if I’m brave enough, lol). Stick to your guns, and I’m sure your family will come around once they meet the little munchkin! [name_m]Caspian[/name_m] is a great name and works very well with [name_m]Leo[/name_m]! Good luck! x
I agree with what the others are saying. And [name_m]Caspian[/name_m] being a sissy name, really, I mean really. [name_m]Caspian[/name_m], in my personal opinion, is very far from being a sissy name. I think it is powerful, warrior like, and full of masculinity.
I have felt the same this time around about not sharing names. My daughters name everyone loved and never got junk for it. My sons name was horrible. He ended up with a name that my hubs and I loved but every name we suggested we got constant snobby remarks, ect. I just gave up telling them and even told them, if they can’t be kind with they’re input I just would stop sharing. So, this time around I just learned to not share. lol I hope that you do stay strong and use the name. I think that you won’t regret it!
[name_m]Caspian[/name_m] is such a strong, handsome name!
If i were you, I’d stick with [name_m]Caspian[/name_m], and not allow them to use a nickname you didn’t want. It’s your choice and they need to respect that.
My sister went through something similar with naming her first kid. Her in-laws said the name was weird and that they’d call her by her middle name instead, but my sister and her husband put their foot down and made them use her first name. They eventually realized they were being stupid and have since come to love her name
[name_f]Love[/name_f] [name_m]Caspian[/name_m]! I agree that [name_m]Leo[/name_m] and [name_m]Caspian[/name_m] are great together. I would go with [name_m]Caspian[/name_m] if that’s what you love best (although I really like [name_u]Owen[/name_u] and [name_m]Ronan[/name_m] on your list, as well!). And frankly, I find it a bit rude that they’d refuse to use the name you picked out. They don’t get to pick the name–they had their turn (or will have their turn, in the case of your sister, I would assume?). The first time they would try to use [name_m]Ian[/name_m], I would set them straight right on the spot. “His name is [name_m]Caspian[/name_m]. Either call him [name_m]Caspian[/name_m], or call him nothing at all.” Unless you like [name_m]Ian[/name_m] and had planned on using it already. I like [name_m]Ian[/name_m]. A lot, even. That’s not my problem here–it’s that they are willfully undermining you, when this is clearly your choice. I think [name_m]Caspian[/name_m] is great, though, and if you love it best, use it!
I like [name_m]Caspian[/name_m] and I think it has some great nicknames (if you choose to use them). I think it is funny that your family thinks [name_m]Caspian[/name_m] is too feminine and yet likes [name_m]Rafael[/name_m]. [name_m]Just[/name_m] goes to show you that perception of names is purely subjective. Once they meet your little [name_m]Caspian[/name_m] and have an actual person to associate with the name they will probably change their tune.
As for your insecurities over the name, I don’t feel like it’s a name that would attract a lot of teasing. It is adorable with [name_m]Leo[/name_m]! I say use it.
I also think [name_m]Ian[/name_m] is a cute nn if you are ok with it.
My twin sister is on a personal quest to get me to change my girl name choice. It’s not going to happen! Good luck to you.
Thanks so much! I thought the same about [name_m]Rafael[/name_m], I think it’s equally as “romantic,” or feminine as some would say…but my dad apparently thinks [name_m]Rafael[/name_m] is “very manly.” lol. They also like a lot of names I don’t care for at all, such as [name_m]Brandon[/name_m], [name_m]Jason[/name_m] and [name_m]Derek[/name_m] (hello 70s/80s! When they were picking names) so perhaps it is just a generational difference. It is still hard for me though to take the leap with [name_m]Caspian[/name_m]. But it’s hard to imagine not doing it too
[name_m]Caspian[/name_m] is a fantastic name. Once the baby arrives, they will love it anyway because it’s his, so don’t let them push you into anything you’ll regret. Good luck!
Ahhh, I absolutely adore the name [name_m]Caspian[/name_m]. It’s tied no. 1 on my list
Definitely, 100% go for it. This is not their child. I would insist that they call him by his proper name, too, not ‘[name_m]Ian[/name_m]’. Stick to your guns!
[name_m]Leo[/name_m] and [name_m]Caspian[/name_m] are swoon-worthy. Best of luck!
(I feel the same way)
