I thought I posted this already but I don’t see that it went through. A week or so ago a family member had an adorable baby boy, my baby is due in 6 months. It’s my second son and when I had my first son it came down to two names [name_m]Augustus[/name_m] and [name_m]Theodore[/name_m]. We went with [name_m]Augustus[/name_m] but have loved [name_m]Theodore[/name_m] ever since. When I found out it was a boy…I was really hesitant about [name_m]Theodore[/name_m] because I felt like it’s become so much more popular in the last three years. Clearly I was right. My family member just used it for her son. I had a few worries she might use the same name but we never talked about it and I thought “what are the odds?!”.
My husband and I had even started referring to the coming baby as “[name_u]Teddy[/name_u]” even though I was still searching for a name we might like even more. We live on opposite ends of the country and don’t see each other often but I consider her close family. I know I’d be put off if the roles were reversed and she used the same name I did just months later. I don’t like the idea of having our kids have the same name either. I’m sure if my husband and I dont find ourselves loving anything else I’ll talk to her about it, maybe she won’t care?
I was really disappointed when I couldn’t use my girl name for this baby which was [name_f]Eleanor[/name_f] after my late mother and now I feel like I really shouldn’t use my boy name. [name_m]Just[/name_m] very disappointed, hormonal and being dramatic I’m sure.
I have to agree with previous posters, just use it if you love it that much. If you think she might raise an eyebrow about you using the same exact name, then phone her up and have a conversation about it.
You also said that you’ve taken to calling your future little one “[name_u]Teddy[/name_u]”; unless both boys decide to go by [name_u]Teddy[/name_u], then it doesn’t matter that they share the same name.
If you really love it, use it anyway. And as others have said, if you think she might not be happy with it, talk to her about it first. [name_m]Theodore[/name_m] is a name with a lot of nickname potential, so if you chose a different nickname that won’t be much of a problem. You also said they won’t see each other very often, so that should be fine.
If you consider her close family I would probably find a different name if I was in your situation. At the very least talk to her before using the name.
I would continue the hunt for a new name. If you like teddy, that might be a great starting point . It could take you to [name_m]Edward[/name_m] (I know one who goes by teddy instead of eddy). Or [name_m]Arthur[/name_m] which means [name_m]Bear[/name_m].
I would use it anyway. I may let her know ahead of time, but that’s a courtesy call, not asking for permission.
I have two cousins named [name_m]Grant[/name_m] born just months apart and they live on different sides of the country. The only people who really ever have to explain are my grandparents who say, “we have two grandsons named [name_m]Grant[/name_m].” End of story.
I say keep looking, since it sounds like you weren’t 100% sold on [name_m]Theodore[/name_m] to begin with. Maybe keep it on the list though just in case you don’t find anything else you love. I think the [name_u]Teddy[/name_u] nickname with [name_m]Edward[/name_m] is a good suggestion. [name_m]Edmund[/name_m] could also work. Some other ideas I’ll throw out are [name_u]Everett[/name_u], [name_m]Abraham[/name_m], [name_m]Tobias[/name_m], [name_m]Arthur[/name_m], [name_m]Gideon[/name_m], [name_m]Barnaby[/name_m], and [name_m]Frederick[/name_m].
I wouldn’t use it. My husband’s brother is named [name_u]Chris[/name_u] and their cousin who is a few years younger is named [name_m]Christian[/name_m]. Though he went by [name_m]Christian[/name_m] growing up, he now wants to go by [name_u]Chris[/name_u]. They aren’t close at all, but it drives them all nuts anyway. It really frustrates [name_u]Chris[/name_u] too now that he is older that he has to share his name with a cousin. There are so many wonderful names that they don’t need to have the same name.
I was having a baby name discussion with my husband the other day and I was saying something like, "I REALLY love this name, but I can’t use it because…
It doesn’t go with the style of our other children’s name.
We know someone with the same name.
We had a pet with that exact name.
It is too matchy with another family member’s name.
Great grandma [name_f]Ethel[/name_f] won’t be able to pronounce it correctly.
So on and so forth…
My husband said, “Stop. Yes, you CAN use the name. You are just making excuses! You can use any name that you want to use! There are no rules here.” I thought about it and he is right, I think a lot of people put too many restrictions on themselves when it comes to baby naming.
I think you should go with your heart. If you love the name, then definitely use it. You only get one life!
[name_m]Ive[/name_m] been thinking, if I choose another name only because she used this one, I will forever feel uncomfortable. If I pick another name it will be because I like it better not because I feel I have to. Thank you all!
Personally I wouldn’t use it. It’s not an awful choice one way or another, however. Although I do think that having two grandsons with the same name might be sort of confusing.
Use it!
Honestly, I have 4 cousins who I rarely see who have the same first and middle name as me. 2 of them are younger than me. It doesn’t bother anybody, and my mom to this day says she ‘feels flattered’ that they loved my name so much lol
They aren’t first cousins, so they have different grandparents. Family tree wise we are actually not close, but we grew up close. I don’t have living first cousins but we might as well have been.
If you do talk to her about it, be prepared she might also be put off about it. However, I’d still give her a heads up, so she doesn’t find out through Facebook or from someone else and maybe has some time to cool off in case she does get angry. I wouldn’t phrase it like a “do you mind” question either because it would put you in an awkward spot if she said she does mind and doesn’t like the idea of the kids sharing the same names.
I wouldn’t use it just because I wouldn’t want my children sharing their names in the family. Everyone is different when it comes to this. However, if this is the name you love do you think you’ll regret not using it? If your heart says yes, I’d use it.