I’ve had my heart set on naming my sons after my grandparents for as long as I can remember. The plan is that one would be named after my mom’s parents and the other after my dad’s. I knew this would mean that my kids would share a first name with two of my cousins, but that doesn’t bother me at all. Recently however, I found out that my aunt and uncle had the same idea and one of my cousins has the same first/middle combo that I’ve been set on forever. They would have different last names, but is it still too much?
It seems like it would be really confusing. I have 3 Pauls in my family, and it’s really difficult to differentiate them in conversation. Maybe just use the names in the middle spot.
I think it depends if you were going to use nicknames or not. I know in my family there is three Morgans with the same last name which can get very confusing.
For me it would be too much
My kids will definitely have different last names than my cousins, but it might be the same first and middle. The name that would be the same F/M doesn’t lend well to nicknames, and the other name has quite a few options.
In that case I would probably keep the common name in the middle spot
That is too much.
It would be rather confusing at family gatherings, or even just looking back at the family tree.
You could still use your favorite honor choices as middle names without things being too confusing, but I would give your future kiddos first names in this case that aren’t already in the family.
My son didn’t get any family names because all of the people I would want to honor and have names I would use have already been used. In some ways I appreciated the freedom of being able to choose whatever I liked and bring new names into our family, though I did feel a little sad every time I had to strike a family name from my list when a cousin or aunt would use it.
Family reunions and cards would drive most people to use nicknames to tell them apart.
That’s not such a deal breaker if you think about it. It depends on how much do you want to hear your children’s names pronounced and recognized by family members. I know families where everybody is a [name_m]Jr[/name_m], or a I, II and III, and it’s perfectly acceptable for them. This would be trickier because as cousins they would belong to the same generation, so it would be something like [name_f]Annie[/name_f] (last name), [name_f]Annie[/name_f] (other last name), [name_u]Baby[/name_u] [name_f]Annie[/name_f] and [name_f]Annie[/name_f] (some physical characteristic).
If you are okay with that, and you feel like you can teach your child to feel the same, it’s 100% your call.
You could also look for alternative names to honor your grandparents, which would make their names and therefore their connection with them a little more unique and personal.
It does sound confusing but I think it depends on the actual names. Are there multiple nickname options? If there’s only one, would you be happy to use it? Could you switch the order? Or use a variant of the actual name?
Since they would have different last names I don’t think it would be too much of a problem. I’m assuming your cousins are around the same age as you so there would be a big age difference between them and your children.
If your family sees each other every week I guess I could see the confusion but for most extended families that only see each other on holidays it seems ok to me.
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They used to do that in the time in the old days. They’ll assumedly have different last-names and nicknames and run in different circles. So I say go for it.
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If I was younger than my cousin, who had the same name as me, I’d honestly be wondering why my parents couldn’t have been more creative 
But if I was older than my cousin with the same name, I’d be wondering why he/his parents stole it
I guess, with age, a child can understand the meaning of honor names 
I’m also a fan of gender bending honor names, especially because you just don’t know if you’ll have all girls or all boys.
I know a family who had 3 girls. The father’s name is J0hn so they named their first daughter J0hnnie, instead of waiting for a son (who never came) to name him J0hn.
I’m not sure from your post whether you’re expecting or not (it doesn’t sound like it, my apologies if I’m wrong), but I would suggest putting a pin in these worries until you know you’re expecting a boy. It could all be null and void worries if you end up with all girls
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For me, it would be two much. Sharing a first or middle name is one thing, but sharing both is a too much for me because I highly value individuality. However, I think it’s definitely a personal choice. I really dislike the idea, but you’re not me and if it doesn’t bother you / you love that name combination then it’s not wrong to use it. Families are good at finding ways to distinguish between similarly named members - for example, we have big [name_m]Mikey[/name_m] and little [name_u]Mickey[/name_u] in my family; two cousins both named [name_u]Michael[/name_u] denoted by their age gap (big = older, etc). There are also multiple [name_m]John[/name_m]’s and [name_f]Helen[/name_f]’s. It’s not that confusing.
Could you reverse the names? Instead of [name_m]Paul[/name_m] [name_m]John[/name_m] you could use [name_m]John[/name_m] [name_m]Paul[/name_m].
Another idea would be to use a different version of the names. [name_m]John[/name_m] [name_m]Jonathan[/name_m], shane, [name_m]Zane[/name_m],
[name_m]Peter[/name_m] could be [name_m]Pierre[/name_m], [name_m]Pierce[/name_m], [name_m]Pedro[/name_m], .
Once a BIL and Sil were talking names for a potential son and were talking [name_u]Michael[/name_u]. This was the name chosen for my then non existant son. I was asked what I thought of the idea. (Both boys would have the same surname but different mn.) [name_f]My[/name_f] answer was okay if you want too. But if I have a son he would still be [name_u]Michael[/name_u]. In the end they went a different name because SIL’s mum did not like the name [name_u]Michael[/name_u].
I’d depends if you see your cousins a lot.
I barely see my parents cousins so yeah.
One of my cousins is named after our grandma and grandpa, the other has the same name as my other grandpa. None of those grandparents are still alive, so each kid would only be sharing with one of my cousins, both of whom live out of state.
They wouldn’t be in the same generation. [name_f]My[/name_f] kids and my cousins would have similar names.
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One has a couple of nicknames, but I don’t like any of them and he’d be called by the full name. The other has tons of nicknames, but my cousin has the best one. I’d love to use that nn but I don’t think I would. The others are plenty cute too.
They’re actually a fair bit older. I’m the youngest by a nearly a decade on all sides of my extended family. Those cousins also live out of state, so we see each other maybe three times a year, though it’s possible that they would move back. I don’t think that they’d ever be confused (most of the family has the same couple of names because of our culture), but I feel like other people might be judge.
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My cousins aren’t in the same generation as my kids will be. They’d be 30 years apart at least! I think my post wasn’t as clear as I intended.