Okay, so ever since I was little I have always felt…disconnected from my name. Although I don’t hate it so much that I would want to legally change it (seems like such a hassle), it is a pain most of the time. Also I just never ‘feel’ like my name. The traits or kind of person I think of when I hear my name is not like me at all. Also since my mother didn’t spell it the ‘usual’ way it has caused me further grief (since it is already a name that people get mixed up with others). I have just come to the point where I feel like I don’t want to use my name anymore; I don’t want to drop it officially but I don’t really want to use it most of the time.
Now if my name ([name_f]Kirstin[/name_f]) had an obvious nickname (besides [name_f]Kirsty[/name_f]/[name_f]Kirstie[/name_f] which I really don’t like) then I would use it, but it doesn’t. I have considered using one of my middle names ([name_f]Elaine[/name_f] and [name_f]Della[/name_f]) but both are my grandmothers’ names. Now I really don’t like [name_f]Elaine[/name_f], just never have. I don’t mind [name_f]Elena[/name_f] but it wouldn’t make sense to use that since it is so different from [name_f]Elaine[/name_f]. [name_f]Della[/name_f] I love, but that grandmother passed away and I never knew her. I just recently began to get in touch with her part of my family and I don’t want to make them uncomfortable by using the name. (Insert big sigh here) See my problem yet?
I have thought about just going by a completely different name (not connected to any of my names in any way). I have tried out a few; [name_f]Branwen[/name_f], [name_f]Persephone[/name_f], even [name_f]Kirsty[/name_f] (which again I don’t like). I am currently using the name [name_f]Pandora[/name_f] a lot, which I love. But I have not tried using [name_f]Pandora[/name_f] on people in real life (strangers I mean), most of the time I use it as a username and that’s about it so far. I love that everyone knows how to say and pronounce it (unlike [name_f]Kirstin[/name_f] which gets spelled and pronounced [name_f]Kirsten[/name_f], [name_f]Kristen[/name_f], [name_f]Kristin[/name_f], [name_m]Christian[/name_m], even [name_f]Christine[/name_f]). I never have to explain that yes it is ‘Ker-stin’ and no it still isn’t ‘keer-stin’. I really do love [name_f]Pandora[/name_f] (so much) but a lot of people look at me (friends, teachers, family) like I am crazy when I tell them it because it is just so unusual and isn’t part of my name at all (so to them it seems random).
I feel like if I could find a proper nickname from any of my names ([name_f]Kirstin[/name_f], [name_f]Elaine[/name_f] or [name_f]Della[/name_f]) then it might solve my problem a bit. Or maybe it wouldn’t, I don’t know, I haven’t come across any nicknames that I have liked yet. I would love to go by [name_f]Pandora[/name_f], but I am starting to wonder if it really is silly to go by something that isn’t your first name, middle name or nickname.
So basically what I am looking for here are any suggestions of nicknames from my names maybe even some advice (on what I should do with [name_f]Pandora[/name_f]…use it or not and whether it matters if it is connected to my names or not) or even a ‘I know how you feel’.
I don’t know about in [name_f]Canada[/name_f] but here in [name_u]America[/name_u] I changed my name (legally) and it was worth every second of trouble. [name_f]Pandora[/name_f] is nms but if you really like it… then just do it! Make it your legal first name and new people you meet will assume you were born [name_f]Pandora[/name_f].
As a side note, I have known several [name_f]Kirsten[/name_f]'s (spelled this way) and everyone of them hates their name. Interesting.
If you wanted a nn for a current name… [name_f]Elle[/name_f], [name_f]Ellie[/name_f], [name_u]Lane[/name_u], [name_u]Laney[/name_u]/[name_u]Lanie[/name_u], [name_u]Kit[/name_u], [name_u]Kerry[/name_u] (kind of a long shot).
Nicknames for [name_f]Kirstin[/name_f] that aren’t [name_f]Kirsti[/name_f]:
[name_f]Keri[/name_f]/[name_u]Kerry[/name_u] (or whatever spelling of [name_f]Carrie[/name_f] - [name_f]Kirstin[/name_f] has the K - R sounds, so I wouldn’t think a [name_f]Kirstin[/name_f] going by [name_u]Kerry[/name_u] was odd)
[name_f]Kira[/name_f]
[name_f]Kiri[/name_f]
[name_f]Kisa[/name_f]
[name_u]Kasey[/name_u]
[name_u]Kit[/name_u] - suggested above but I’m repeating it because I like it!
Names for [name_f]Elaine[/name_f] and [name_f]Della[/name_f]
[name_f]Ella[/name_f] - combining the two
[name_f]Ellie[/name_f]
[name_u]Laine[/name_u]
[name_f]Lainie[/name_f]
[name_f]Elodie[/name_f] ([name_f]Ela[/name_f] + De)
[name_f]Adele[/name_f] / [name_f]Adela[/name_f] / [name_f]Adeline[/name_f] (these use letters from both)
[name_f]Elana[/name_f]
Perhaps you could find a way to use [name_f]Pandora[/name_f] as a nickname? Maybe you have personality traits in common with Pandoras in mythology or books? I have a friend named [name_f]Catherine[/name_f] and everyone calls her [name_f]Jane[/name_f]. Someone started calling her that because she’s a lot like [name_f]Jane[/name_f] [name_m]Bennet[/name_m] from Pride and Prejudice, and the name stuck.
[name_m]Hi[/name_m] ladyvanraven, I definitely sympathize with feeling disconnected from your name. If you like [name_f]Pandora[/name_f], use it! It’s a beautiful name, and people really will call you what you want to be called. I agree with rainydaygarden, [name_f]Elle[/name_f] and [name_f]Ella[/name_f] are both great nicknames.
I like [name_f]Elle[/name_f]/[name_f]Ellie[/name_f]/[name_f]Ella[/name_f] as a NN for [name_f]Elaine[/name_f], if you wanted to go that route.
But you’re free to change your name legally to whatever you want! It’s your prerogative. I know a woman who I know as [name_u]Laurie[/name_u] and she changed her name legally from something she considers so terrible that she won’t even tell me what it was. It may be a few weeks of paperwork but it’ll be worth it if you will be happier for it in the long run.
Whether you should use [name_f]Pandora[/name_f] or not is something you’re going to have to decide for yourself. Yes, it’s unusual but if you love it then by all means. If you aren’t in love with your own name (or middles) then you may as well go as far from them as you want.
What other names are you considering?
I will say that I used to relate to you. [name_f]My[/name_f] first name is [name_f]Olimpia[/name_f], and while now I love it I used to get teased all the time as a child, for reasons that are still not clear to me. It just seemed like a target. So my options were to start using [name_f]Mercedes[/name_f] or [name_f]Bianca[/name_f], my middles (also from grandmothers). At the time I didn’t like either of those either so I just dealt with it. So I understand, for a lot of my childhood I really resented my name. Now I love [name_f]Olimpia[/name_f] and [name_f]Mercedes[/name_f] and use those two as my names for most legal documents. (poor [name_f]Bianca[/name_f] has been sort of dropped by the way side! lol)
I would say if pandora is who you want to be then go with it.
[name_f]My[/name_f] name is [name_f]Roberta[/name_f] but feel no connection with it so have always gone by [name_f]Bobbi[/name_f], when I hear the name [name_f]Roberta[/name_f] it always feels like someone else’s name.
[name_f]My[/name_f] nan was named [name_u]Joan[/name_u] but hated it so decided to go by [name_f]Maureen[/name_f]. Everyone knew her by this name, even her mother, my great grandmother would call her [name_f]Maureen[/name_f] because its what made her happy. I think your family and friends should understand and accept whatever you want to be called and love you regardless. Good luck : )
I really liked: [name_f]Kira[/name_f], [name_f]Kiri[/name_f], [name_f]Kisa[/name_f], [name_f]Ella[/name_f], [name_f]Adele[/name_f] and [name_f]Adela[/name_f] (especially the last two).
Thanks for everybody’s support of [name_f]Pandora[/name_f]. I think I will just keep thinking about it for a while. I have a few years still (I’m 16) before I can legally change my name, and who knows maybe I will not wan’t to at that point or be over [name_f]Pandora[/name_f]. I think what I will do is try out some of the nicknames you guys have so graciously given me (as well as [name_f]Pandora[/name_f]) and just kind of see what feels best.
If you really want to be [name_f]Pandora[/name_f] then go for it. Start the transition now by introducing yourself as [name_f]Pandora[/name_f]. You may not be legally [name_f]Pandora[/name_f] for a couple of years but it’s a good way to establish yourself.
People won’t forget you, the name will stand out on a CV, people with unusual first names are more likely to get job interviews and in turn, more likely to get the job.
You’ll be mentioned to other people by the people you meet
“I met a woman named [name_f]Pandora[/name_f] today!”
It’ll always be a conversation starter with [name_m]New[/name_m] people.
Your life will change because of it, people will perceive you differently, certain names have certain personas attached to them.
I am in the process of legally changing my name. [name_f]My[/name_f] name is [name_f]Victoria[/name_f] [name_f]Alexandra[/name_f], I’m getting rid of [name_f]Victoria[/name_f] because I hate it! I’ll be [name_f]Alexandra[/name_f] [name_f]Teah[/name_f], my last name will be changed too. A whole new me with a whole new life to led.
It seems like you love [name_f]Pandora[/name_f], and if that’s the case, you should go for it.
You can also use a name that means the same thing as one of your middles.
Same as [name_f]Elaine[/name_f] “bright”:
[name_f]Alberta[/name_f]
[name_f]Bridget[/name_f]
[name_f]Callie[/name_f]
[name_f]Claire[/name_f] / [name_f]Clara[/name_f]
[name_f]Clarissa[/name_f]
[name_f]Nova[/name_f]
[name_f]Phaedra[/name_f] (you might like this one)
[name_f]Phoebe[/name_f]
Same as [name_f]Della[/name_f] “noble”:
[name_f]Ada[/name_f]
[name_f]Adara[/name_f]
[name_f]Adina[/name_f]
(pretty much all [name_m]Ad[/name_m]- names)
[name_f]Alice[/name_f] / [name_f]Alicia[/name_f]
[name_f]Alina[/name_f]
[name_f]Alison[/name_f]
[name_u]Alva[/name_u]
[name_f]Arwen[/name_f]
[name_f]Audra[/name_f] / [name_f]Audrey[/name_f]
[name_f]Briana[/name_f]
[name_f]Mona[/name_f]
[name_f]Patricia[/name_f]
[name_f]Talisa[/name_f]
