I am 35 (soon to be 36) and have not had kids yet. I’m a little worried about getting pregnant at my age since the risk of complications is greater if a woman has her first child after 35. I had a miscarriage when I was younger and am worried that may be a sign that I’ll have a high-risk pregnancy.
What I want to know is if any of you had your first child after 35, and, if so, did you have a healthy pregnancy?
I was 18 days short of my 36th birthday when I had my first. It took me a year to conceive as I had mild PCOS and needed clomid. My next two were conceived naturally. This last one took me 18 months to conceive and I needed progesterone as my lining wasn’t good enough to maintain a pregnancy. I had 1 early miscarriage and 3 chemical pregnancies ttc this one, but we’re in the home stretch now. I’ll be about a month short of 43 when this one is born.
It can be harder for some to conceive, but not all. All my pregnancies were easy and I’ve had no problems or issues due to my age. All my labours were ‘easy’ and straightforward though I did have a bad tear with my first.
This might be an interesting read to you: How Long Can You Wait to Have a Baby? - The Atlantic
Thanks for your helpful reply. I never even thought about it being harder to conceive, but I guess I should have figured as much. At least now I know what I might have to face. Thanks again!
Thanks for the link, joana 
I had my first at 37 and second at 39, both healthy! There were placental problems with the first but these were related to platelet issues and could have happened at any age.
Thanks! That’s great to hear!
I just turned 36 a few weeks ago, and am currently 18 weeks pregnant. However, you will see from my signature that it has not been an easy ride (this was IVF attempt #3). We have unexplained infertility, although I’m convinced that my age is a factor as I previously conceived “by accident” when I was 21 (this pregnancy ended in a termination). On the bright side, all looks good so far.
@velvetcrush I’m glad things are looking good so far, and I wish you the best!
Well, I’m 34 (35 around the corner) and conceived my second pregnancy (first ended in mc, when I was 33.5) after only 2 months of trying. I really think we place too much emphasis on 35 here in the U.S. - lots of other first-world countries do not consider that “advanced maternal age” - at least, that’s what I’ve been told. Yes, some risks go a bit higher but more and more women are conceiving after 35 these days and most babies are born perfectly healthy.
Besides the age thing, I know how easy it is to assume you’re going to have conception issues after you lose your first pregnancy to a mc (my history is same as yours, accidental preg ended in termination when I was about 20, then first pregnancy while trying ended in mc). It’s never easy to deal with a mc but I think it’s slightly worse when it’s your first baby - if you already have at least one healthy baby, then at least you know you’re physically able to carry one. Does that make sense? I’m definitely not trying to upset anyone, every loss is hard. But anyway, I’m currently 16 weeks pregnant and it was really, really hard to not think of myself as “high risk” while trying the second time around - my doctor and my husband had to keep reminding me that one loss is considered normal, whether it’s your first baby or third or whatever. Up to 50% of pregnancies end in a mc (that’s including pregnancies that are so early along, the woman doesn’t even necessarily realize she’s preggo) and I think it’s 1 in 4 women will have one. So it’s very, very common. But again, when it’s your first, it can make the process of trying again that much more daunting.
Anyway, best of luck to you! I highly recommend tracking your ovulation with the at-home kits, those help so much (when you’re ready, that is). Besides that, take your folic acid and do whatever you can to relax and minimize your worry-level. It’s very important to start the pre-natal vitamins before you get pregnant, especially for those of us in our mid- to late-30’s. But, at least for now, odds are still good that you’ll be able to conceive within a year and have a healthy baby just like millions of other women out there. Think as positive as you can, it will make it a much less painful, slow experience. Much easier said than done, I know! Good luck and lots of healthy baby dust to you!
I conceived my first when I was 36. It didn’t take incredibly long to conceive (6 mos), but I was diligently tracking BBT and ovulation. I am beginning to to have my doubts about the fertility plunge that happens at 35, too. I want to see more current research. But, there definitely are greater chances of chromosomal abnormalities that occur past 35, so that should be kept in mind. Also, fertility is not infinite, and there is a decline, so even if it isn’t necessarily happening at 35 for all women, there is a clock to remember.
Basically, just because you are 35 doesn’t mean you’ll have any problems conceiving at all. It also doesn’t mean you’ll have a high-risk pregnancy. It is a good time to figure out your priorities, though, and if being a mom is one of them, it’s probably time to make the plan to make it happen.
Good luck! It’s a great time in life to do it, in my opinion!
Nothing happens at 35 exactly. I know OB/GYN’s who have told me that they have seen 30 yr olds who have the fertility/hormone levels of 40 yr olds and vice versa. Of course it’s based on statistics, but the actual cutoff age is just to provide a frame of reference for the statistics. I conceived my first at 34 and was shocked that, because I would deliver at 35, they categorized my pregnancy as “high risk”. I was told by my doctor that, although 35 is somewhat arbitrary because everyone’s different, for practical reasons there has to be a cutoff for age for them to start testing for certain things more diligently.
My pregnancy was healthy, and I hope/plan to have another in a year or two.
Thanks everyone for your replies!
A friend of mine is over 40 and has a son that is just over 1. I haven’t pried into her birth story, but she has confided in me that he will be her only child. He’s a healthy & happy little boy. Having kids late in life is totally a possibility, though dreams of a big brood might not pan out. I also know plenty of young mom health scares, so there really is no telling how things will go. You could always consider adoption or fostering if you feel you are too old by the time you are ready to be a mom.
Thanks Taz. Adoption is something that I’ve been considering lately. It’s definitely a good option.
Well I am 37 and have yet to have a baby. I have conceived 3 times, but ended in early miscarriages. 
My doctors have reassured me that I am not old and that I still have time.
My GP told me she had her boys in her early 40s.
I think 45 should be the new “cut off” age. A lot of people don’t marry til they are in their 30s and it’s not only people that were focused on their careers. It is tough to find Mr. (or Mrs.) Right.
That’s exactly why I haven’t had kids yet – I’ve been focused on my career AND I haven’t found Mr. Right yet. I’m just worried that if I wait too long, I won’t be able to conceive. But as I said earlier, there’s always adoption. There are plenty of children in need of a loving home, and I don’t mind opening up my home and heart to them.
Well, I’m just one example–but I’m 43 and pregnant with our first-and-only. I got pregnant unexpectedly after 18 months of trying and one failed round of IVF. Maybe you can’t count on having kids in your forties, but I suspect the sense of alarm around waiting is overblown, especially if you’re in good health.