Funniest/Worst names you've ever seen or heard?

General Name Discussion
1

What are some of the funniest and worst names you’ve ever come across, either IRL or on TV/the internet?

Funniest:

  • Speed Weed – Co-Producer for Law & Order SVU

  • Peter Bonerz – A director.

  • Chris P. Bacon

  • Jack Goph – One of my 3rd cousins went to school with this person.

  • Scott Butts – Realtor in my area.

  • Jurassic Park

  • Tyrannosaurus Rex Mullens – A criminal

  • Batman Bin Suparman

  • Bud Light

  • Dumas & McPhail – Lawyers.

  • Donald Duck – Another criminal.

  • Sue Yoo – Lawyer

  • Harry Pitts – A substitute teacher I had in HS.

  • Holly Wood – My dad or one of my uncles went to school with this girl.

  • Robocop

  • Buzz Michelangelo

  • Jed I. Knight

  • Fire Penguin Disco Panda

  • Dr. Whet Faartz

  • Craphonso Thorpe – Football player

  • Kash Register

  • Young Boozer – AL State Treasurer

Worst:

  • Adolf Hitler (and his siblings JoyceLynn Aryan Nation, Honszlynn Hinler Jeannie, Heinrich Hons, and Eva Braun) Campbell – Eva on its own is a nice name, and Jeannie is fine, but the combinations are horrible. Why would you name your kids after Nazis or anything associated with evil? Adolf itself wouldn’t have been bad if it wasn’t associated with a certain dictator.

  • Talula Does The Hula From Hawaii – Banned from New Zealand. Poor girl was so embarrassed by her name so I’m glad to see that no other parents can use it for their kids. Talula is bad enough as it is IMO. The rest is just cruel.

  • Hellzel – One parent wanted Hazel and the other wanted to name the kid after Hell’s Angels so they compromised.

  • Rage – Be pretty ironic if this kid grows up to be a pacifist. lol

  • Akuma – “Devil” in Japanese. Thankfully, the Japanese government banned it.

  • Nutella – A couple in France tried to name their daughter this, but the government said no and the name was changed to Ella, which I’m not a fan of, but it’s a lot better than being named after the popular chocolate hazelnut spread.

  • Anal – Another one banned in NZ.

  • Monkey – Banned by Denmark, along with Anus, Pluto, and several others.

  • Violence – Somehow okay’ed by the NZ government, along with Number 16 Bus Shelter and Midnight Chardonnay.

  • Unique

  • Isis or anything else with unfortunate associations.

  • Phelony

  • Abstinence

  • Tu Morrow (and many other celebrity baby names)

  • Danger

  • Nimrod – A legit Hebrew name, but has a totally different meaning here in the US.

  • Ashcan – A contestant on Junior Masterchef Australia had this name. It’s probably completely innocent where his family was from (I don’t know because the show never said it. I didn’t see how it was spelled either so I’m going by how it was pronounced). In English, not so much!

Not a fan: * Nevaeh – I don’t get the fascination with spelling things backwards and using them as names.

  • Any boys’ name/surname for a girl – Horrible trend! I just wanna scream when I hear that someone named their daughters James, Noah, Madison/Addison, Mackenzie, etc… There are plenty of girls’ names out there that are feminine and strong at the same time and non-frilly ones. I consider a huge majority of those so-called “unisex” names masculine. That said, there are a few I don’t mind for girls, even if I probably wouldn’t use most of them.

  • Any title or rank like King, Messiah, Lord, Queen, Princess, Major, Captain, etc…

  • Anything with “kreative” spellings (Aliviyah, Riellie [Riley. I worked with someone who spelled her oldest daughter’s name that way], Peightyn, Mykal, Jaymez, Ollyver, etc…)

  • Names of alcohol, drugs, weapons, cars, most places, anything that sounds more like a pet’s name than a human’s. – I used to work at a daycare center and one of the little girls was named Alizé after the drink and another little girl was named Remmington after the guns, only misspelled. There was also a boy named Royce, as in Rolls-Royce and another boy named Trentyn.

2

I don’t think it’s fair to put surnames/boys names on girls (or [name_f]Nevaeh[/name_f] for that matter), in a thread where you equate them to being as horrible as naming your child Anal, Violence, and [name_m]Adolf[/name_m] Hitler.

I’d like to think there’s levels of “worst names ever” - ones you dislike because they’re not your style and ones you dislike because they’re unusable due to offensive or inappropriate reasons.

ETA: Also, [name_m]Matthew[/name_m] Correspondent isn’t his real name, it’s [name_m]Matthew[/name_m] [name_m]Price[/name_m], he’s a news correspondent and this was an error on BBC’s part. #12 on this list.

3

Thanks for clearing up the [name_m]Matthew[/name_m] Correspondent one! I’ll remove it from the list. [name_m]Matthew[/name_m] [name_m]Price[/name_m] is a perfectly nice, normal name.

4

[name_f]Do[/name_f] we really need another thread ridiculing other people’s names? Also, surname names on girls is not a trend. Bestowing surnames – whether of family members, friends, or personal heroes – on one’s offspring has been an established naming practice for centuries.

5

So my brother went to a car race somewhere in [name_m]New[/name_m] [name_u]Jersey[/name_u] and the people who participated had their names on the back of a T-shirt. One of the names on my brother’s shirt was “Yadont [name_m]Say[/name_m]”. He thinks the man had been drinking when he registered…

6

I don’t think names should be gendered, I was raised pretty liberal and as a feminist so we were never taught to abide by gender roles.

I actually quite like unisex names and “boy names” on girls

7

I completely agree, in theory, but in practice so many people would refuse to give their sons ‘feminine’ names that I think it kind of defeats the point of defying the gender roles (and kind of glorifies masculinity/encouraging a hierarchical view of gender).

In reference to the original discussion, a family friend recently met a child called T’keela. As in tequila.

8

Nobody I know of comes to mind but my partner thinks [name_f]Delilah[/name_f] is too unusual to actually use but someone naming their kid Yoda would be okay “because it’s funny”.

Someone help me! What have I gotten myself into with this man! :stuck_out_tongue:

9

[name_m]Dumas[/name_m] & McPhail reminds me that I saw an advertisement recently for a lawyer named Failey. Not a good omen, haha. There’s also a law office near my house called [name_u]Sawyer[/name_u], as in [name_u]Sawyer[/name_u] the [name_m]Lawyer[/name_m]. That’s not exactly bad, but it is pretty funny!

I actually like surnames and masculine names on girls though (and feminine names on boys). I also don’t think most titles are that bad (I kind of like [name_m]Major[/name_m])!

10

I don’t really agree with this. Two things can be equal and still be different from each other. Being a boy with a boy name doesn’t mean you have to abide by ‘gender roles’ or anything like that, same with girl names. And surnames aren’t my style at all, but they are still surnames, and I think they could be used on girls and boys equally. But I don’t like clear boy names likes [name_u]James[/name_u] and [name_u]Elliott[/name_u] on girls. Of course, some of that may be my love of frilly girl names.
As for worst names, I’m getting good at reminding myself not to judge. The only thing that bugs me is weird spellings, but really only if they are spelled so strange, it’s hard to know how to pronounce them.