My partner had a looksie at my boys list and chose [name_u]Dean[/name_u] and [name_m]Grant[/name_m] for twin boys. I love these together, I think these make great brothers. However, he is pretty adamant that we use [name_m]David[/name_m] in the middle for his late father, no matter the first name. I have always found honour names to be a little weird (no offence obviously, just for me). I just don’t like remembering my passed on family members in that way, and I have wonderful combinations that I love already. I have a couple honour names in my signature, but they’re obscure references and no one would make the connection unless I told them.
So if we had a [name_m]Grant[/name_m], it would be [name_m]Grant[/name_m] [name_m]David[/name_m]. Of course my FIL was a wonderful man who died very tragically, and I get why DH wants to use it, but I’m such a name nerd that I’m having a hard time with it. (Still on the topic of twin boys) He suggested that [name_u]Dean[/name_u]'s middle would be a honour name from my side to match. My dad and brother both share my grandpa’s name of [name_m]Robert[/name_m] as their middles…so [name_u]Dean[/name_u] [name_m]Robert[/name_m]. Could be [name_u]Dean[/name_u] [name_m]Ian[/name_m] too but that doesn’t sound good in the slightest.
[name_u]Dean[/name_u] [name_m]Robert[/name_m] and [name_m]Grant[/name_m] [name_m]David[/name_m].
Not my style, but hubby’s picks. Of course this all hypothetical as we’re not TTC until later this year and we could have all girls! But he likes [name_m]Grant[/name_m] [name_m]David[/name_m] as his #1 for a single boy too. Have you ever had to give up your combos for an honour name? I tried changing [name_m]David[/name_m] to [name_m]Davies[/name_m] in one combo, but he doesn’t like variations. I have a difficult time with boys, but my favourites are two-syllable S names like [name_u]Spencer[/name_u], [name_m]Simon[/name_m], [name_m]Soren[/name_m], [name_u]Sidney[/name_u], and the others in my signature. Any advice for this? I’m trying not to be selfish…two middles maybe!!!
My advice would be to make sure you love the first name, but I think it would be nice to let your husband use [name_m]David[/name_m] in the middle since it seems to mean so much to him. I know that means that you have to sacrifice choosing a middle that you love, though, so I would talk to your husband about doing two middles. That could be a great compromise.
It sucks when you aren’t able to use the combo that you set your heart on, but your husband’s input is equally as important and valuable as yours. Relationships are a compromise, and baby names are included in that.
You really lucked out that he liked two names from your list; at least you aren’t starting from ground zero in that regard. If you think using two middles will settle your namenerd heart, then it might be worth raising the suggestion to him to see if he’s on board. I think using one name that you love off of your list and a name that he loves as an honour name is a fair tradeoff though. If it’s any consolation, I’ve never seen anyone on this forum with baby name regret for a middle name, lol. Middle names factor in so little to personality, it probably won’t bother you when your [name_m]Grant[/name_m] [name_m]David[/name_m] is starting preschool, or when his name is being called at graduation.
What about [name_m]Grant[/name_m] [name_m]Davies[/name_m] and [name_u]Dean[/name_u] [name_m]Rupert[/name_m]? These flow a bit better to me, feel a little more unique/fresh, and still give a pretty obvious nod to your honor names without being exactly the same name
I’m biased since I [name_u]LOVE[/name_u] honor names. [name_m]Grant[/name_m] [name_m]David[/name_m] is fantastic and you both get to have a hand in choosing the child’s name. I learned very quickly that my husband gets equal say in name choices.
I decided to keep my daughter’s birth name in her name when I adopted her, so I know what its like to have to work around a name you wouldn’t ordinarily choose, but imo, sometimes there are more important things in naming a child than if its your perfect name.
In your case, I’d keep [name_m]Grant[/name_m] [name_m]David[/name_m], it may not be your style, but it clearly means a lot to your husband, and I’m sure it will to his family too. Two middle names is also a valid option. I wouldn’t feel obliged to give your other children honour names though, if you don’t want to.