Has anyone else had a massive change in name taste at any point?

[name_m]Hi[/name_m] all,

First time poster, looong time reader here :wave:

I’ve always been obsessed with names and I’ve had an evolving baby name list as long as I can remember.

However, now I’m 31 and my partner and I are finally TTC, suddenly my taste in names has completely changed!

I’ve always been a bit quirky and “hippie” and my name preferences portrayed that. But where I used to love short modern names like [name_f]Kaia[/name_f], [name_m]Koa[/name_m], [name_u]Ari[/name_u] or [name_u]Oak[/name_u], suddenly I’m finding myself drawn to more more traditional names like [name_f]Audrey[/name_f], [name_m]Theodore[/name_m], [name_m]Patrick[/name_m] or even [name_f]Cordelia[/name_f]!

Did anyone else go through something like this when the time came for you to actually name your babies? What’s it like to be name obsessed once you actually have kids and you can’t change their names anymore?

[name_m]Hi[/name_m] @gabi88!
I’m not the best person to talk to since I’ve always liked classic names and I don’t have kids, but I think that what you’re experiencing is super normal, and even more so once you see your little one for the first time! I’ve heard so many accounts where a couple had the name picked out, but once they saw them they immediately changed their mind! When I do have kids, I plan on waiting to secure a name until I meet them!

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[name_f]My[/name_f] taste in names has changed many times over. Although I always still love the names I used to adore, every once in a while I become convinced that The Name for me is a specific style, and then the rest of my list follows suit. Right now it’s Biblical/[name_u]Christian[/name_u] names. Sometimes it’s crazy word names, modern/trendy names, or old-fashioned names.

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For what it is worth, I know a little [name_f]Maia[/name_f], [name_u]Ari[/name_u], and [name_u]Oak[/name_u] and they each wear their name well. I feel that those modern, short, quirky, hippie names definitely work in the real-life context.

That said, it is totally natural to feel differently now that the once far-off prospect of a child has grown more concrete. [name_f]Audrey[/name_f], [name_m]Theodore[/name_m], [name_m]Patrick[/name_m], and [name_f]Cordelia[/name_f] are each wonderful names and while popular, I don’t think there are TOO many of any one of them in the world, so they would make fine choices for a little one.

I didn’t experience the same dramatic shift, but I experienced the same feelings of doubt that are perhaps creating the effect of the shift. I certainly had to interrogate my choices more than before and discover WHY my quirky name choices were still going to be right for me and my real-life child.

I still have one more prospective child I’m looking to name so I do still have the forward momentum and am not only looking at names in hindsight, but I do find it is different being obsessed with names after having actual human children.

For one, all of my choices shifted from infinite possibilities to focus on the sibset cohesiveness and style. I cared about this before but when all the names of the world were ahead of us before our first, things looked a bit different. Now that we have two, it has become even more important to me to have a third name with the “right fit.”

I’m also a LOT less focused on popularity than I once was. I haven’t done a spreadsheet digging into the SSA data since before my first son was born. Probably largely because I no longer have much kid-less time, but also I’m just not that worried about the 47 other children with my potential child’s first name anymore. Avoiding trendy or popular names but finding the right feel and familiarity used to be such a huge focus. I used to worry that my first’s chosen middle name, F3l1x, was way too popular for me to choose, and I would agonize about what else I might put with his first name. Only to come back to the same choice time and time again. Now I don’t give it a second thought, even when we have met two little boys with that first name since he was born. I just don’t care anymore. I still don’t LOVE any top 100 names for either sex, but if I did, I would use it. [name_m]Even[/name_m] names that I feel are trendy, I no longer care about NOT being on the trend bandwagon.

I think that once I’m wholly and truly done naming babies, I will likely have regrets about some of the names that got away. But now that I have named someone and have the feeling of satisfaction of still being in love with that name in every way, so much of the pressure I used to feel has been lifted. I feel I have so much more self-efficacy because of it.

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[name_f]My[/name_f] style seems to shift through cycles a lot, and each one is a bit of a dramatic change. I honestly don’t know which style is the most authentically me, but I do find that it happens often for me!

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For several years during middle and early high school, I favored a lot more elaborate, unique, or fanciful style. For years, my absolute favorite name was [name_f]Amaryllis[/name_f]. [name_f]My[/name_f] favorite boys’ name was [name_u]Taliesin[/name_u]. I still really like the sound of both those names, but they don’t really fit with my general taste now, which is much more simple and classic, and I wouldn’t use them myself (except maybe for a pet). I feel like I’ve gotten more practical as I’ve gotten closer to actually having kids, and also I’ve learned to love a lot of simple but beautiful names I didn’t notice before. The one type of name that’s really stayed with me through this shift in style into adulthood is simple nature/word names, like [name_u]Winter[/name_u], [name_u]Rowan[/name_u], [name_u]Sparrow[/name_u], [name_u]Lark[/name_u], and [name_u]Skye[/name_u]. I used to really like them then and I still do now, but I’d be more likely to pair them as middles with a more traditional first (think [name_u]James[/name_u] [name_u]Rowan[/name_u] or [name_f]Olivia[/name_f] [name_u]Lark[/name_u], just off the top of my head).

[name_f]My[/name_f] very earliest favorites in elementary school were super weird, though, I didn’t really have a style but I remember absolutely loving the names [name_f]Clarissa[/name_f] and [name_f]Tracee[/name_f] (only that spelling, not [name_u]Tracy[/name_u]) and both of those are very much NMS anymore. It’s not like “well, I still like [name_f]Amaryllis[/name_f] but it doesn’t fit with my other names and it’s not as usable” it’s like…[name_f]Tracee[/name_f]? Why that spelling? What was going through my head? :joy:

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Thank you! I’ve also been obsessed with having a “unique” name for my child but now I’m a bit older and ready to bring them into the world, suddenly having a relatively common name is appealing! I will definitely try to avoid the top 50 at least, but loved hearing the way you feel about your sons name now (also, great name!). Very validating :slight_smile:

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Mmm I looove nature/word names too! I’ve kept some of them in my list as middles. Slightly different to yours but these are some stand outs: [name_u]Sage[/name_u], [name_f]Opal[/name_f], [name_u]Wilde[/name_u], [name_u]Wren[/name_u].

Unfortunately my MIL is super traditional and keeps suggesting family names as middles! Not sure I’ll succumb to the pressure or stay in my own lane on that one… We do have some pretty cute family names but they get quite repetitive with everyone giving their kids mn’s after their grandparents ([name_f]May[/name_f], [name_m]John[/name_m] etc). We actually have a long line of [name_m]Oliver[/name_m]/[name_f]Olive[/name_f]’s on my mum’s side which I love but the cursed popularity of that name has rendered it totally unusable for me.

Oh and we had a great aunt who was a real character Ev@ Gr@ce, but my first niece got that name! So timeless and wonderful. All my siblings’ other kids have honour names too and I’m the youngest so the best ones are pretty much all gone unfortunately.

I love [name_u]Wren[/name_u]! [name_f]Opal[/name_f] is really great too.

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