Head and heart is torn between two names

Need help choosing between head and heart. Sorry for the long post.

Im not really after opinions on the names themselves. But how do you know which to choose when you could regret not using either one?

Pregnant with last baby. Dont know gender yet. But we finally decided on [name_f]Arwen[/name_f] [name_f]Elvia[/name_f] (g) and both me and my partner love it. We initially had [name_f]Arwen[/name_f] [name_f]Belle[/name_f], which was our top for ages. But circumstances meant we could no longer use [name_f]Belle[/name_f] without upsetting close family members.

But I’ve also been crushing on [name_u]Fox[/name_u] on and off for ages. And today Ellowyn [name_u]Fox[/name_u] popped into my head and there was an instant emotional pull. It had that ‘feeling’. You know the one I mean?

However I also have that feeling with [name_f]Arwen[/name_f]. And now I dont know. I love both, for different reasons. [name_f]Arwen[/name_f] was a name we wanted for my first daughter and decided against it… I dont want to regret not using it again. And I dont know why Ellowyn [name_u]Fox[/name_u] has such a strong emotional reaction in me but its there in my gut and I cant ignore it.

I know I will likely know when I see them. But Im still worried I will have name regret since this is our last.

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They are both beautiful names! I had a somewhat similar situation in that I was stuck between two names for one of my twins (the other’s name was already picked). I ended up choosing the name I had loved for longer because I figured if I never had another little boy I would regret not using it most. Hopefully we will have another baby but if it’s a girl then I won’t ever use the other name.
I would maybe take both names to the hospital with you and if the baby turns out to be a girl then go by how you feel whenever you meet her. I have heard some people say that helped them, though I will admit mine looked like he could be either one at the time.
Maybe try to think of what draws you to each name. [name_f]Arwen[/name_f]’s nns could be [name_u]Arie[/name_u] or [name_f]Winnie[/name_f]. Ellowyn could be [name_f]Ellie[/name_f] or [name_f]Winnie[/name_f].
Also, Ellowyn is still rare but likely to gain popularity. Something to think about if it bothers you. It may also have more spelling problems as there are multiple ways to spell it that are getting popular.
Maybe switch up the name to [name_f]Arwen[/name_f] [name_u]Fox[/name_u] and see how it feels?


I completely get what you mean! [name_f]Susanna[/name_f] Deliverance was that “gut feeling” name for me. Ultimately you will know which name is right for you baby. If that means waiting until you meet her to see which name suits, that’s perfectly okay. Whether she is [name_f]Arwen[/name_f] or Ellowyn, you will know.


What I would do and plan to do if I ever have or adopt kids (a long way away from that though I’m only a young teen) is wait until I meet them for the first time. Maybe even a day or two; however long it takes. I feel like a name is an important part of a person’s identity and it is very important to choose the right one. No pressure though!!

I think you are liking Ellowyn [name_u]Fox[/name_u] and it is super beautiful. Have you considered a double middle name? Like [name_f]Arwen[/name_f] [name_f]Elvia[/name_f] [name_u]Fox[/name_u]?


What about [name_f]Arwen[/name_f] [name_u]Fox[/name_u]? I think that that sounds so beautiful, and combines parts of both names you love!

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I agree with @dogs_books; [name_f]Arwen[/name_f] [name_u]Fox[/name_u] is beautiful!!

I dreamt of the name [name_f]Arwen[/name_f] [name_u]Fox[/name_u] recently and it hasnt been able to leave my head, but partner wasn’t keen on it, and that’s when I came up with Ellowyn [name_u]Fox[/name_u] today and its was an instant light bulb / spark reaction. I initially spelt it Elowynne [name_u]Fox[/name_u], and [name_m]Ive[/name_m] had [name_f]Elowen[/name_f] as an option on the past but partner prefers it as Ellowyn. He likes both Ellowyn and [name_f]Arwen[/name_f] though so he isnt helping. And I know when the time comes I will probably know which name suits best. Its just that initial choosing between them and the anxiety of making the decision for them.

If we have a boy its an easy pick. They practically named themselves. Girls names have never been easy for me though which doesnt help.

I would say that since there isn’t a super important family connection to either name, you should just choose the one you love more. I don’t think you would regret it. If you love it now, you will probably always love it. I agree that waiting until you meet her may be the best way to secure her name.

Both names are lovely so i dont think you can go wrong either way. Personally, I’d go with [name_f]Arwen[/name_f] because i think you’d regret not using it. But honestly, wait until you meet them and see what clicks

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