Help! My Hubby and I have completely different taste in names

General Name Discussion
1

We are now expecting baby #2 and here we go again! We do not plan to find out the sex of the baby and we cannot agree on names. My husband seems to hate all my names. I had a list of 50 potential girls names and he didn’t like even 1! With our son ([name]Oliver[/name] [name]Michael[/name]), [name]Oliver[/name] was the only boys name we both liked and we chose [name]Michael[/name] to honour my grandfather…I’m finding this very stressful as I have been constantly researching names and my hubby never likes them. HELP!

Here are my tops for now:

Girl: [name]Esme[/name] [name]Josephine[/name] (I also love [name]Sadie[/name], [name]Rowan[/name], [name]Pearl[/name], [name]Charlotte[/name], [name]Nora[/name], [name]Ruby[/name], [name]Piper[/name])
Boy: Arlow [name]Ramone[/name] (I also like [name]Anthony[/name], [name]Wyatt[/name], [name]Ronan[/name], [name]Ari[/name])

My husband is OK with the middle names as they are to honour people but hates the first names…

Thanks for the advice!

[name]Sarah[/name]

2

I think [name]Oliver[/name] and [name]Esme[/name] would be a lovely pair! Have you asked your husband his opinion on [name]Esme[/name] yet? I also love the spunky [name]Sadie[/name] and the classic [name]Charlotte[/name]. With [name]Oliver[/name], I would eliminate [name]Piper[/name] (ends the same) and [name]Ruby[/name] and [name]Pearl[/name] ([name]Olive[/name], [name]Ruby[/name] & [name]Pearl[/name] = colours).I’m not too crazy about Arlow (it looks like the girls name [name]Harlow[/name] with the “h” chopped off). While different in style, I think [name]Ronan[/name]/[name]Rowan[/name] have the same spunk as [name]Oliver[/name]. [name]Wyatt[/name] would be fine too. Is [name]Ramone[/name] a family name? Maybe you should get your husband to make his own list and see if you like any of HIS suggestions.

3

[name]Hi[/name] [name]Mischa[/name],

Thanks so much for all your advice!

Hubby doesn’t like [name]Esme[/name], he said it sounds made up :frowning:

I like your points on [name]Piper[/name], [name]Ruby[/name] & [name]Pearl[/name]. I hadn’t considered the colour thing.

Hubby hates Arlow too.

[name]Ramone[/name] isn’t a family name and it was a concession I made as my husband is a huge Ramones fan. I wouldn’t use it for [name]Oliver[/name] so I said if we had another boy we could use it as a middle name. This one isn’t for sure as it will have to go with the first name.

With both my son and this baby I’ve asked my husband to come up with lists, he’s not really the list type. He is actually quite annoying about the whole thing…He’s driving me INSANE! I told him our child will be named [name]Baby[/name] [name]Flann[/name] forever because we won’t have a name ready on time!

Any other suggestions to go with [name]Oliver[/name] would be greatly appreciated. Hopefully someone can suggest a few gems I haven’t thought of :smiley:

Thanks!

[name]Sarah[/name]

4

It sounds like your husband prefers classic names, since he shot down your suggestion as “too made up.” It’s frustrating when you do so much research into naming practices, but still have to share decision-making power with someone who hasn’t put nearly as much thought into it.

I think [name]Ramone[/name] as a middle (or the usual Spanish spelling, [name]Ramon[/name]) is very cool. Unexpected and fun. Perhaps, if you grant him that concession, he’ll be more open to compromise on the other names you’re considering.

Classic girls’ names which would match with [name]Oliver[/name]:

[name]Amelia[/name]
[name]Lydia[/name]
[name]Lucy[/name]
[name]Violet[/name]
[name]Ava[/name]
[name]Caroline[/name]
[name]Eleanor[/name] (guys tend to hate this)
[name]Genevieve[/name]
[name]Ivy[/name]
[name]Julia[/name]
[name]Lily[/name]
[name]Mariah[/name]
[name]Vivian[/name]

Boys names which match with [name]Oliver[/name]:

[name]Leo[/name]
[name]Simon[/name]
[name]Julian[/name]
[name]Felix[/name]
[name]Adrian[/name]
[name]Emerson[/name]
[name]Everett[/name]
[name]Gabriel[/name]
[name]Isaac[/name]
[name]Jonas[/name]
[name]Maxwell[/name]
[name]Theo[/name]

I think choosing a first name with an R in it somewhere would sound great with [name]Ramone[/name] (like you did with Arlow):

[name]Adrian[/name] [name]Ramone[/name]
[name]Emerson[/name] [name]Ramone[/name]
[name]Gabriel[/name] [name]Ramone[/name]

As for female middle names-- men tend to think that the “vintage revival” names which women find sweet are still very old lady-ish. [name]Josephine[/name], [name]Eleanor[/name] & [name]Mabel[/name] should all be sitting on a porch somewhere.

I would select a familiar but not overused female name to pair with a more uncommon middle, i.e:

[name]Lucy[/name] [name]Carolina[/name]
[name]Mariah[/name] Celandine
[name]Ava[/name] [name]Corisande[/name]

Then you can indulge your taste for names, while he won’t worry that he’s named his kid “something weird.”

5

[name]Oliver[/name] and brother…

[name]Sebastian[/name]
[name]Hugo[/name]
[name]Cassius[/name]
[name]Asa[/name]
[name]Jonah[/name]
[name]Tristan[/name]
[name]Barnaby[/name]
[name]Vincent[/name]
[name]Maxwell[/name]
[name]Silas[/name]
[name]Gideon[/name]
[name]Timothy[/name]
[name]Samuel[/name]
[name]Gregory[/name]
[name]Winston[/name]
[name]Jude[/name]
[name]Tobias[/name]
[name]Duncan[/name]
[name]Bennett[/name]
[name]Damian[/name]

[name]Oliver[/name] and sister…

[name]Felicity[/name]
[name]Imogen[/name]
[name]Rosamund[/name]/[name]Rosalie[/name]
[name]Iris[/name]
[name]Stella[/name]
[name]Juliet[/name]
[name]Sabrina[/name]
[name]Zoe[/name]
[name]Clara[/name]
[name]Naomi[/name]
[name]Willa[/name]
[name]Daphne[/name]
[name]Beatrice[/name]/[name]Beatrix[/name]
[name]Matilda[/name]
[name]Penelope[/name]
[name]Emmeline[/name]
[name]Annabel[/name]
[name]Lucia[/name]/[name]Lucy[/name]
[name]Sonia[/name]
[name]Isabel[/name]
[name]Phoebe[/name]

6

[name]Archie[/name]
[name]Gus[/name]
[name]Maxwell[/name]

[name]Veda[/name]
[name]Scarlet[/name]
[name]Elsie[/name]
[name]Cassandra[/name]
[name]Elena[/name]

7

I kind of feel like if he isn’t willing to tell you any names he does like, he shouldn’t be able to give you a hard time and veto names he doesn’t like. It sounds like he’s very picky and you’re more open, given that you came up with 50 acceptable names and he shot them all down. At least if he’s giving reasons for why he doesn’t like particular names, you’re not flying completely blind. It sounds like he’s uncomfortable with foreign names–saying the French [name]Esme[/name] sounds “made up”–so maybe try out names more classically used in [name]Britain[/name] and the U.S.

Good luck to you. I thought my ex was bad, but even though he was opinionated and hated almost everything I came up with, he did have suggestions of his own, a couple of which were actually kind of nice.

8

Hey! Sorry you’re having such trouble with [name]Oliver[/name]'s sibling’s name! Boo.

Anyhow, if hubby thinks [name]Esme[/name] looks made up - it’s not, and it’s a great match with [name]Oliver[/name]! - try [name]Estelle[/name] or [name]Estella[/name]. Off your list, [name]Sadie[/name], [name]Pearl[/name], [name]Charlotte[/name], [name]Nora[/name], and [name]Ruby[/name] work best with [name]Oliver[/name] because they are vintage hipster names. If you’re [name]Sarah[/name], [name]Sadie[/name] might not be the best choice anyway - [name]Sadie[/name] is a [name]Sarah[/name] nickname, so maybe you could relegate that to a middle name spot and try [name]Susannah[/name] or [name]Sylvie[/name] instead? If [name]Pearl[/name] is a “no,” you could try [name]Violet[/name] or [name]Hazel[/name], or maybe something like [name]Phoebe[/name] or [name]Penelope[/name]. [name]Charlotte[/name] is by far the most classic on your list, so maybe try more quirky [name]Coraline[/name] or more classic [name]Caroline[/name], or something similar but more vivacious like [name]Christabel[/name] or [name]Christiana[/name]? [name]Scarlett[/name] or [name]Eliza[/name] would be pretty, too. [name]Nora[/name] is a little more homespun, so maybe a name like [name]Ada[/name], [name]Adeline[/name], [name]Beatrice[/name], [name]Delilah[/name], [name]Dinah[/name], or [name]Nell[/name] might work. As for [name]Ruby[/name], see my suggestions for [name]Pearl[/name], or try [name]Ramona[/name] or [name]Rosanna[/name].

As for Arlow, would he like it better as [name]Arlo[/name]? I’m wondering what your husband even likes, to be honest. Any hints? You might go for a more sturdy boy’s name like [name]Oliver[/name] - [name]Beckett[/name], [name]Everett[/name], [name]Francis[/name], [name]Graham[/name], [name]Henry[/name], [name]Jude[/name], [name]Leon[/name] ([name]Leo[/name]), or [name]Ronan[/name]?

Best of luck to you! Let me know how it goes, and I’m always available by private message if I don’t get back here!

[name]Lemon[/name]

9

Thank you all so much for your advice and wonderful suggestions. I love so many of those names. I will try running a new list by my husband and see how it goes. I honestly can’t figure out his taste. He doesn’t like French or Italian names (I’m half Italian so I like many) but likes some Spanish names…I’ll keep you posted. Wish me luck!

10

good luck-- come back when you have a mutually agreed-upon list!

11

Good luck! My husband and I had a similar problem - our naming tastes are quite different. I also think guys sometimes need a bit more context. I used to look up so many names and show him lists etc and he’d just find it overwhelming. So I stopped reading my suggestions to him! Then, later in my pregnancy, he started looking at names on his own - in particular, the meanings. He came home one day telling me he’d found the perfect name, it just had such a beautiful meaning and it was one I’d suggested to him and he’d said no to months earlier! It’s now the name of our daughter and we both love it still!

12

First off, I happen to love your picks!! I guess I won’t go through the list since your husband doesn’t agree to these I’m guessing…?

Some options that fit this style/sound but weren’t listed:

girls : posey (as a nn for josephine), eloise “lola”, jade, wren, waverly
boys : archer, thatcher, sullivan, jonah, leo

13

[name]Esme[/name] [name]Josephine[/name] is lovely. I also like [name]Ruby[/name] and [name]Nora[/name] [name]Josephine[/name].
I prefer [name]Arlo[/name] spelled this way. [name]Ramone[/name] is nice.