We are having such a hard time with names for our second son.
Our 2 year old is [name_m]Henry[/name_m] and we [name_u]LOVE[/name_u] his name so much.
We have always been drawn to the classic more conventional names but out of nowhere we both are seriously considering the name [name_u]River[/name_u] for this little one.
However, my biggest hang up is that the name sounds mismatched with [name_m]Henry[/name_m]. I worry people will hear their names and think “[name_u]River[/name_u]?!?!?! [name_m]How[/name_m] did they go from [name_m]Henry[/name_m] to [name_u]River[/name_u]???”
What are your thoughts?
For what its worth the other front runner is/was [name_m]Oliver[/name_m] but our hang up with that one is its sheer popularity at the moment.
I think it’s fine. I’ve met plenty of siblings with names that are fairly different and I don’t think these are too different actually. [name_m]Henry[/name_m], though classic, has gained a lot of popularity recently after some time of being less popular and I think [name_u]River[/name_u] has gained popularity in the last few years too. Both feel pretty earthy and outdoorsy but also versatile.
So I’m surprised by the style shift between [name_m]Henry[/name_m] and [name_u]River[/name_u], but then again, I follow 4 name blogs. Does the average population care or even know about matching sibsets? I just don’t know. Ultimately, I’d rather see people choose names they love rather than names that they only like, but coordinate better.
I have a real soft spot for [name_u]River[/name_u] and definitely think you should go for it if you love it!
[name_m]Henry[/name_m] and [name_u]River[/name_u] are pretty mismatched BUT they are connected in such an excellent way - that you and your partner just absolutely love both names. You may get people think ‘huh, that’s unexpected’ but then immediately carry on with their lives and never think of it again. As most of us here are interested in flow and sibsets, etc. I can see why this is a hiccup, but when you step out of Nameberry and think of the whole life your son is going to have as an independent person, the fact that he has a brother called [name_m]Henry[/name_m] probably isn’t going to affect things in any considerable way. If there’s a way of making the middle names fit nicely would that help in any way?
If you see him and know that he’s [name_u]River[/name_u], don’t worry about the few ‘huh’ responses (to be honest, I’ve just seen the new [name_m]Prince[/name_m]'s name and had exactly that response - huh, that’s unexpected - but have now got over it and love putting the name to a little squishy face) I’m on Team [name_u]River[/name_u] and thing you should go for it!
I love [name_u]River[/name_u], but I do agree. The mismatched style does/would really annoy me. Personally, I don’t think I’d use to drastically different names.
However, if you really love the name I think you should use it. It’s not “wrong” just because it’s stylistically different.
I see no problem with a difference in style/feel of names between siblings. As long as you love it, it fits with your last name, and you can imagine calling that name in for dinner or signing it to your holiday card, go with what you like! I personally think [name_m]Henry[/name_m] & [name_u]River[/name_u] are adorable brothers. Consider this : We don’t expect our kids to be the same, or have the same personalities. Why do their names have to?
They do seem mismatched on paper but if I heard them introduced I would not side-eye it at all.
[name_m]Henry[/name_m] and [name_m]Oliver[/name_m] do seem the more obvious (predictable?) choice.
I think you should go with a name you love in every way. If your style has changed and you love [name_u]River[/name_u] then go for it. It’s a beautiful name.
Not to complicate things but you could use it as a middle…
And if you’re concerned about [name_m]Oliver[/name_m]'s popularity you could choose a name with similar feel like:
I’d be in the “how did they get from [name_m]Henry[/name_m] to river” camp, however, [name_m]Henry[/name_m] is such a versatile name that it works with modern (not bryxton but river or [name_u]Wren[/name_u]) and classic names.
I also don’t think it matters what other people may think. The only thing that would bother me personally is that one of the names would likely become dated to this decade while [name_m]Henry[/name_m] is timeless.
Maybe [name_m]Oscar[/name_m] could be an alternate to [name_m]Oliver[/name_m]? Depending on where you live it may be just as popular, though.
Sibsets don’t need to match. Ultimately choosing names you love is way more important. I don’t think [name_m]Henry[/name_m] and [name_u]River[/name_u] sound bad together. They sound like lovely names, both of them, even if they are stylistically different. I can easily see them as brothers.
I actually think they sound like brothers. [name_m]Henry[/name_m] is kind of an outdoorsy hiking sounding name to me so [name_u]River[/name_u] makes sense with it. Also, just by the sounds and not my connotations they sound good together- two syllables, some of the same letters. I think it totally works. I don’t know if this is helpful or not but my kids names are Wilcken, Thunder, and [name_f]Melia[/name_f]- they’re all sort of different styles I guess but I like the way they sound together and I love all their names individually. No one has ever said anything about the names in contrast with each other.
I like both [name_m]Henry[/name_m] & [name_u]River[/name_u]. As someone who would go from the classic [name_m]Benjamin[/name_m] to the name [name_u]Satchel[/name_u], I see nothing wrong with [name_m]Henry[/name_m] having a brother named [name_u]River[/name_u]. If you like it, use it!
I have to agree with primbutcher on this one. I think the average person wont care or wont notice. I know someone who went from [name_u]Cassidy[/name_u], to [name_f]Evelynn[/name_f] to [name_m]Clarke[/name_m] (all girls) and no one in our office made any kind of remarks about how they werent “matchy”. I think its just the name nerds who might notice and even then they dont feel too different. Its not like one is [name_m]Henry[/name_m] and the other is [name_m]Kwabena[/name_m]. That might raise some eyebrows.
I think it’s definetly strange and would raise some eyebrows, and if you are worried about it now I would be concerned about name regret later. I would definetly keep it on the list for now, but I do think it would be a good idea to look for more names that are more similar to [name_m]Henry[/name_m] and [name_m]Oliver[/name_m].
I absolutely love [name_m]Henry[/name_m] and [name_u]River[/name_u] together. I think [name_m]Henry[/name_m] and [name_u]River[/name_u] are totally different styles but they compliment each other well. When said together [name_m]Henry[/name_m] automatically becomes a little more carefree and [name_u]River[/name_u] a little more traditional.
I believe I’m in the minority amongst my fellow name nerds but to me sibling sets with variety are more fun. [name_m]Henry[/name_m] and [name_m]Oliver[/name_m] go together perfectly because they have the same button up. classic vibe… which is a great vibe. But that vibe is in use in your family and I think it’s fun to throw in the outdoorsy, casual vibe!
I also think siblings spend most of their lives as individuals, not being compared to each other… so it’s more important they have equally loved names, not names that match perfectly.
Lastly I think that sometimes when a name is appealing to a couple despite going against the grain of their normal style, there’s a reason for it. My son [name_u]Lennon[/name_u]'s name is so different from our usual classic style. For this reason I had major doubts about using it while I was pregnant. But we loved it so much and names that fit our style better… we just didn’t love. I’m so glad we went with his name. It fits him perfectly. And I love it next to his sister’s vintage name.
I love this idea! It sets your family apart from other families who have a [name_m]Henry[/name_m] paired with another classic name. I also think these names actually share quite a few qualities (two syllables, strong “r” sound, etc) that make me understand why you’d like them both!
Other ideas if you just can’t get comfy…
If you like [name_m]Oliver[/name_m] (but it’s too common) and [name_u]River[/name_u] (but it’s too far outside of your style), what about:
[name_m]Asher[/name_m]
[name_m]Archer[/name_m]
[name_u]Sawyer[/name_u]
[name_m]Sayer[/name_m]
[name_u]Porter[/name_u]
[name_m]Thatcher[/name_m]
[name_u]Carter[/name_u]
[name_u]Parker[/name_u]
[name_m]Tucker[/name_m]
I think they’re handsome together. Unexpected, yes, but not wildly so. I grew up with friends whose names were really very unlike their siblings (think sisters born in the 80s called Saraswati, [name_f]Mahala[/name_f], [name_f]Zuleika[/name_f] and [name_f]Tara[/name_f]), and I didn’t notice the discrepancy until we were all too old to worry about such things.
In some families, a wild discrepancy might cause some jealousy or resentment. But [name_m]Henry[/name_m] and [name_u]River[/name_u] are both likely to be considered ‘normal’ names by their peers (I know 1 [name_u]River[/name_u], and no Henrys). Perhaps when they’re older they’ll ask about the story behind their names, but I doubt they’ll be upset by any possible ‘mismatch’.
As for what adult strangers/acquaintances think: honestly, who cares? The names aren’t weird or offensive. Let them wonder whether you have a Grandpa [name_m]Henry[/name_m] or an Uncle [name_u]River[/name_u] or whether you saw My Own Private Idaho on your first date. If they’re your friends or seem genuinely interested, you can explain why you like the names, if you want. But you don’t actually owe anyone an explanation (except maybe your children, if they ask).
If you’re really worried, I’d suggest trying to articulate the reasons why you like [name_u]River[/name_u], and why you chose [name_m]Henry[/name_m]. Maybe write a list together? That way, if either child asks, you can explain how meaningful their names are to you.
I actually think they work wonderfully together! Sometimes you’ve just got to drop the mentality of everything must match in style/meaning/syllable/sound and say they sound good together!! [name_m]Henry[/name_m] and [name_u]River[/name_u] definitely sound like adorable brothers to me. As for the “it doesn’t match/is very unexpected” responses, so do many sibling names, families don’t always match! My brother and I have very tailored, classic biblical names- our stepbrother is [name_u]Alfie[/name_u]. One of my oldest cousins is the very classic [name_m]Oliver[/name_m], his young sister is the spunky, modern [name_f]Lilli[/name_f]. From non-blended family groups I have cousins [name_f]Phoebe[/name_f] and [name_m]Oliver[/name_m], and their little brother [name_m]Bear[/name_m], or [name_m]Jacob[/name_m], whos little brother is [name_u]Parker[/name_u]. My point is nothing dictates that sibset names have to match in style, as long as you love the name ”
I think they are fine! People who are not into names will not even blink an eye. If you are that worried you could always do [name_u]River[/name_u] in the middle with a more “classic” FN.
Sibling names don’t have to “match”, however, they will eventually grow up and live their own lives!