My husband and I are due with our first child this fall and although we don’t know the gender yet, I’ve been trying to add to our name list. It took us 3 months to name our dog and I’m concerned we won’t be able to agree if we don’t start now!
Family names are important to me and I’d really like to honor my grandmother if we have a girl. The problem is I don’t love my grandma’s name: [name_f]Darlene[/name_f].
I don’t hate it, but I don’t love it either. I don’t feel that I can use her middle name, since it is the same as mine as well as my [name_f]MIL[/name_f]'s, my [name_m]SIL[/name_m], and my niece.
Right now, DH and I like the name [name_f]Lydia[/name_f]. Thoughts on [name_f]Lydia[/name_f] [name_f]Darlene[/name_f]? Or do you have other first name ideas? Or other ideas to honor a family member without directly using their name?
Thanks!
Oh- I should have mentioned, our last name is one syllable, so I’d like a longer name (not necessarily in spelling, but in syllables).
Why don’t you think you can use her/your/[name_f]MIL[/name_f]/[name_m]SIL[/name_m]'s middle? If anything, that honors several people at once! Unless you don’t like the name at all. [name_f]Lydia[/name_f] [name_f]Darlene[/name_f] actually flows pretty well and I think the two names go together. If you’d rather have something different, find a name with the same meaning as [name_f]Darlene[/name_f] or a similar sound. [name_f]Darla[/name_f]/[name_u]Darby[/name_u]/[name_u]Darcy[/name_u] would work.
Thanks for the ideas. [name_u]Baby[/name_u]'s first cousins (sisters with the same middle names) would have the same middle name and although I like it, I just feel that it’s a bit overdone in the family right now. It is also a very common middle name.
[name_f]Lydia[/name_f] [name_f]Darlene[/name_f] flows nicely, but if you prefer not to use it, I guess you can use [name_f]Lydia[/name_f] Darling or any other names with “darling” or “love/beloved” as the meaning. [name_f]Lydia[/name_f] [name_f]Carys[/name_f]? [name_f]Lydia[/name_f] [name_f]Imogen[/name_f]? You can also pick something with less obvious connection. For example, your grandma loves daisy or pearl and it reminds you to her.
[name_f]Lydia[/name_f] is pretty. [name_f]Lydia[/name_f] [name_f]Darlene[/name_f] flows well, but I agree, not my favorite name either.
This may be a ridiculous idea, but have you considered [name_f]Lydia[/name_f] Darling?
You could also look up the meaning of [name_f]Darlene[/name_f], and find other names you like better with the same meaning.
Or you could use her initials and give your daughter the same initials. Then you could have the letter of the first and middle names so it would help you narrow down name searches without feeling limited.
If you want some [name_f]Darlene[/name_f] honoring ideas:
[name_f]Lydia[/name_f] [name_f]Delphine[/name_f]
[name_f]Lydia[/name_f] [name_f]Daphne[/name_f]
[name_f]Lydia[/name_f] Darianne
[name_f]Lydia[/name_f] [name_f]Cheryl[/name_f] (means darling)
[name_f]Lydia[/name_f] [name_f]Cherilyn[/name_f] (a play on cheryl)
[name_f]Lydia[/name_f] Darielle
I hear you. [name_f]Darlene[/name_f] is not a great name.
You could go with [name_f]Arlene[/name_f] or [name_f]Marlene[/name_f] (even say it [name_f]Mar[/name_f]-[name_f]Layna[/name_f], like [name_f]Marlene[/name_f] [name_m]Dietrich[/name_m]).
You could go with a D starting name.
I think I would favor something she loved in life: a jewel or tree or place or trait.
What is your grandma’s MN? You could still honor her but use her MN instead of FN so it’s different.
[name_f]Lydia[/name_f] [name_f]Darlene[/name_f] is a really nice name though.
There are a million ways to honour someone you love very much!! And I say this with the best of intentions and I love the fact that you want to honour your grandmother, who clearly influenced you positively in life…but the name [name_f]Darlene[/name_f]…ehh…just not so much.
However…there’s lots of hope for you!! You could use her favorite flower, I don’t know what that is, but a flower name with [name_f]Lydia[/name_f] (phenomenal name btw :D) would he beautiful…if it happened to start with a D double bonus, such as [name_f]Lydia[/name_f] [name_f]Dahlia[/name_f] or [name_f]Lydia[/name_f] [name_f]Delilah[/name_f] or [name_f]Lydia[/name_f] [name_f]Daisy[/name_f], or you could use her favorite color, or a variation of, like her favorite color is red [name_f]Lydia[/name_f] [name_f]Scarlett[/name_f] , or purple [name_f]Lydia[/name_f] [name_f]Violet[/name_f], or blue [name_f]Lydia[/name_f] [name_u]Cerulean[/name_u] (oooh, or even [name_f]Lydia[/name_f] [name_u]Indigo[/name_u] is beautiful! ). Or you could use the street she grew up on, or last lived on, which might or might not be usable, I don’t know. [name_m]Barker[/name_m] street, eh not so much, [name_f]Fern[/name_f] street or [name_u]Dove[/name_u] lane, definitely usable [name_f]IMO[/name_f]. Or you could use a name she loved in her life that she may have never got to use for a child of her own for whatever reason. Or you could use the birthstone for her month she was born in, which again I don’t know what that is, but [name_f]Lydia[/name_f] [name_f]Amethyst[/name_f] is lovely, as is [name_f]Lydia[/name_f] [name_f]Garnet[/name_f] or [name_f]Lydia[/name_f] [name_f]Peridot[/name_f], bonus points if you can make a correlation between birthstone and favorite color, like her fave color was red and she was born in [name_f]July[/name_f] ([name_f]Lydia[/name_f] [name_u]Ruby[/name_u]). Or as a couple people have also mentioned you can take the meaning of the name and search a name with the same meaning, or simply use a variation of [name_f]Darlene[/name_f], such as [name_f]Lena[/name_f], [name_f]Elaine[/name_f], [name_f]Darla[/name_f], even [name_u]Lennox[/name_u], even though that might be a bit if a stretch. You could also use a [name_m]French[/name_m], Spanish, Russian, Swedish, etc variant of the name.
Good luck, there’s tons more wiggle room there than you think!!! :)
My personal belief is that honoring a loved one by giving his or her name to your child is a really big deal. If it’s important to you to recognize this person, the meaning behind the name trumps the name itself. Sure, you can tell Grandma that [name_f]Lydia[/name_f] [name_f]Arlene[/name_f] or [name_f]Lydia[/name_f] Darling is named for her, and she’ll certainly appreciate it, but I think the name loses a little of it’s significance if the honor requires an explanation. There are exceptions, to be sure (like using a favorite flower from Grandma’s garden or something that had special significance for the two of you), but unless a name is truly horrific I’d use it in its original form, whether I loved it or not. I have one son with the middle name [name_m]Richard[/name_m], which I don’t care for, and my son due next month is getting the middle [name_m]Steven[/name_m], which I also don’t love. However, [name_m]Richard[/name_m] and [name_m]Steven[/name_m] are my kiddos’ grandpas, and my sons will have a special connection with them through sharing their names.
With all that being said, I understand that [name_f]Darlene[/name_f] isn’t really an illustrious name, but [name_f]Lydia[/name_f] [name_f]Darlene[/name_f] is sweet and is far from a horrible option!
^Thank you, @bjoy, for putting this into words - I just spent way too long trying to express this.
If you use [name_f]Darlene[/name_f] itself, it’s a very clear action; if you use [name_f]Darla[/name_f] or Darling, it’s pretty clear but not precise; if you use [name_f]Daria[/name_f] or [name_f]Lena[/name_f] that seems less clear again; and so on. I know people have made lots of suggestions of alternatives and I get why, I just think that if it’s much of a stretch at all, it’s also conversely less of an honour.
That said, I’m also of the opinion that the middle name spot is perfect for this kind of problem. [name_f]Lydia[/name_f] is gorgeous, and while [name_f]Lydia[/name_f] [name_f]Darlene[/name_f] doesn’t do a lot for me on a purely aesthetic basis, it’s totally, totally usable.
I so feel for you - I’m in a really similar situation (except that I’m not pregnant so it’s all theoretical)!
You could use her favorite flower, I don’t know what that is, but a flower name with [name_f]Lydia[/name_f] (phenomenal name btw :D) would he beautiful…if it happened to start with a D double bonus, such as [name_f]Lydia[/name_f] [name_f]Dahlia[/name_f] or [name_f]Lydia[/name_f] [name_f]Delilah[/name_f] or [name_f]Lydia[/name_f] [name_f]Daisy[/name_f], or you could use her favorite color, or a variation of, like her favorite color is red [name_f]Lydia[/name_f] [name_f]Scarlett[/name_f] , or purple [name_f]Lydia[/name_f] [name_f]Violet[/name_f], or blue [name_f]Lydia[/name_f] [name_u]Cerulean[/name_u] (oooh, or even [name_f]Lydia[/name_f] [name_u]Indigo[/name_u] is beautiful! ). Or you could use the street she grew up on, or last lived on, which might or might not be usable, I don’t know. [name_m]Barker[/name_m] street, eh not so much, [name_f]Fern[/name_f] street or [name_u]Dove[/name_u] lane, definitely usable [name_f]IMO[/name_f]. Or you could use a name she loved in her life that she may have never got to use for a child of her own for whatever reason. Or you could use the birthstone for her month she was born in, which again I don’t know what that is, but [name_f]Lydia[/name_f] [name_f]Amethyst[/name_f] is lovely, as is [name_f]Lydia[/name_f] [name_f]Garnet[/name_f] or [name_f]Lydia[/name_f] [name_f]Peridot[/name_f], bonus points if you can make a correlation between birthstone and favorite color, like her fave color was red and she was born in [name_f]July[/name_f] ([name_f]Lydia[/name_f] [name_u]Ruby[/name_u]). Or as a couple people have also mentioned you can take the meaning of the name and search a name with the same meaning, or simply use a variation of [name_f]Darlene[/name_f], such as [name_f]Lena[/name_f], [name_f]Elaine[/name_f], [name_f]Darla[/name_f], even [name_u]Lennox[/name_u], even though that might be a bit if a stretch. You could also use a [name_m]French[/name_m], Spanish, Russian, Swedish, etc variant of the name.