So I have some broader questions and a more specific one… first off, what are your preferences for honour names? [name_f]Do[/name_f] you prefer to use a name that closely honours one person, or a name that honours several people? [name_f]Do[/name_f] you feel any pressure to pass down family names? At what point back the family tree does a name lose the honorific meaning?
Now for my specific question: on my dad’s side of the family there are 4 M.argaret’s, as well as 2 M.aria’s and a M.arie (counting as far back as I can). On my mom’s side there are 3 M.ary’s. I feel like it would be nice if one of the cousins on either side kept passing down M.argaret/M.ary (for the respective side of the family), but I’m kind of wondering… would something like [name_f]Margot[/name_f] or [name_u]Marion[/name_u] work to honour all the lovely "[name_f]Mar[/name_f]"s in the family? [name_u]Or[/name_u] is it too much for one name to honour 10+ people?
Thank You!!
So many questions! Let’s start at the beginning:
I personally prefer honour names after one person, and using their exact same name if possible. But recently I’ve also been considering deriving honour names from surnames, so that would honour several.
I don’t feel pressured to use any at all, but I’d really like to do so.
The point where it loses its meaning is hard to pinpoint. Maybe it doesn’t really lose it, but changes gradually from honoring one person to honoring heritage? Sometimes people go back 300 years in their family tree and use those names - “it’s a family name” rather than “she’s named after my 6-times-great-grandma”.
For your specific problem, I don’t think it’s too much. It’s just more of the general kind of honour name - “[name_f]Mar[/name_f]- names are a tradition in my family” - and less of the specific “I’m named after my grandma, great-aunt, great-grandma, …”
Hope this helps any!
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It’s a family tradition for initial honor names, so that’s my preference, but I also like the idea of using a variant or a name from something important to the person.
I prefer only 1 person but for my own honor names they end up honoring several people. I think any more than 3 people per name is too many and kind of loses the meaning a bit.
I don’t feel pressure exactly, but honor names are a family tradition and I want to continue it!
I would only honor people I knew personally and liked. Otherwise you run the risk of finding out after using the name that they were a terrible person or something.
As for your question, I think [name_f]Margot[/name_f] or [name_u]Marion[/name_u] would be great to honor all those people! Since there are so many people, I would maybe pick one or two that you knew and liked to specifically tell your child that they’re named after, to make it a bit more personal. But family names like that are great - they have a lot of meaning and a fun history to them that other names just don’t have!
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I think [name_f]Margot[/name_f] and [name_u]Marion[/name_u] totally work!
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For honor names, I prefer to only use the actual name of someone if they are deceased. If they are living, I tend to choose another name in the name tree to honor them (i.e. [name_u]Lisa[/name_u] may be honored by [name_u]Lee[/name_u]). I also tend to group multiple honorees together if A) their names are similar (i.e. [name_u]Christian[/name_u] to honor a [name_m]Christopher[/name_m]) or they have similar international variations (i.e. [name_f]Katherine[/name_f] and [name_f]Caroline[/name_f] / [name_f]Carolyn[/name_f] both have an international variation of [name_u]Kai[/name_u] or [name_f]Kaia[/name_f]) or B) their names can be combined to make another name with history, even if I have to add a letter or two (i.e. barbARA + LISa = ARAceLIS).
Side Note: I have multiple people with the same name within my family, which makes it impossible to determine who is being referred to when we are speaking, especially when so many have the same nicknames. I am striving to avoid adding to this even when I am honoring family. I am a little less particular when it comes to friends’ names… I will do my best to ensure that we have distinctive nicknames for our child(ren) even if they have a name matching that of a friend (i.e. If we have a friend named [name_m]Sebastian[/name_m] who goes by [name_m]Seb[/name_m], our [name_m]Sebastian[/name_m] will go by [name_m]Baz[/name_m]).
I don’t feel any pressure to pass down family names from my family so far, but I have yet to have a child. Most of the pressure is what I put on myself to honor specific people. I went through and made a list of people that I want to be sure to honor based on specific attributes that I want my kids to emulate in their own lives, whether they meet that person or hear stories of them.
As for honoring all of the [name_f]Mar[/name_f] names on both sides of the family, I would personally choose a different [name_f]Mar[/name_f] name, such as [name_f]Margot[/name_f] or [name_u]Marion[/name_u] from your example or [name_f]Maris[/name_f] to honor them altogether. This way you can say you are honoring them, but not having someone say that you chose a specific person/people to honor and not the other names.
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