i have a close friend who has made it rather clear that she HATES one of the names we’ve chosen for our expected twin girls…so much so that she has predicted that my daughter will be depressed and ridiculed about her name as she goes through life and that when that happens, my friend will let her know that she ‘had her back’ before she was born…
she’s accused me of cow towing to my husband (We decided to each name a baby, even though this name…azalea…is one that i suggested to him so really i picked it too) and surrendering my ‘power’ to him…when really this just seems like a power struggle between her and me!
im really taken aback by this and am not sure how to press forth with it…it feels like an elephant in the room now.
It is one thing to state your opinion and another to do what your friend is doing here. I am expecting and I have learned to stop sharing name ideas with anyone who gives me constant negative reactions to the names. I would just not speak to her about the subject and let her know look it is my child and this is her name.
Ugh. I hate it when people do that. If you don’t like a name, it’s perfectly fine to express that opinion. But there’s no need to be crazy about it or perseverate on it. I would just tell her that while you value her friendship and her opinion, you love this name, your husband has agreed to it, she’s made her opinion clear, and you would appreciate it if she’d keep her negative comments to herself from now on. If your daughter does end up hating her name, she can certainly go by a middle or nickname ([name]Lea[/name] is an easy, common one for [name]Azalea[/name]) or even change it altogether. There’s a woman named Marajuana Pepsi who works as a college counselor, and [name]Azalea[/name] is nowhere NEAR that bad- so while a “bad” name may be challenging at times, even the worst name won’t prevent a child from success. I would pay little or no attention to her negative comments. No matter what name you choose, someone is bound to hate it. I just say “tough, it’s not your kid so deal with it.” and move on.
And by the way, I think [name]Azalea[/name] is beautiful.
its so funny because she actually has changed her name to harmony from her birth name…i was like…uh, you of all people should know that if she doesn’t like it, she can do something about it…
not to mention the irony that is the name harmony…lol.
i did what you both have suggested. we raised the white flag and agreed to disagree…but wow. ive never had someone react so strongly! i just took it as her loving me so much she felt like she could act like one of those jackasses that think they can manipulate what name you choose because they are family or something…
I really dislike it when ‘friends’ do this. I am not sharing any of my names with family or friends because I know that most if not all of them would turn up their noses at my choices.
I would just tell your friend that she will or has the oportunity to name a child and that this is your chance and job.
BTW I really really hate it when people claim to have on the best in mind for you children as if YOU as the parent don’t… :roll: egotistical much?
The fact she changed her name to [name]Harmony[/name] should be a big sign that you shouldn’t put much weight in her advice (no offense to the [name]Harmony[/name]'s out there!)
Really, it is so inappropriate to be that opinionated about what your friend names their child. Sure, I can understand if you were naming your daughter “Aluminum” or something, but [name]Azalea[/name]?! [name]Azalea[/name] is a GORGEOUS name. I love it for so many reasons, you should not doubt your decision! I actually have a friend named [name]Azalea[/name], and she gets complimented on her name all the time. And she tells me that she has loved having the name [name]Azalea[/name] her entire life! Next time your friend shoves her opinion in your face, just tell her to have her own child and she can pick the name (and you will choose to hate it just to show her how it feels :lol: )
aww, i love hearing the story of a real-life azalea…makes me all misty eyed.
yah i got caught up in the argument for a second and then i was like…ugh, this is silly…my son’s name is ocean for chrissake, i mean…i dont need to run the approval committee when i name my babies…just that she came on so STRONG…it was weird!
I’m sorry that you have to go through this…it sounds like at some point when the time is right you might need to let your friend know just how NOT ok it is that she continues to put your child-to-be’s name down.
However, I agree with everyone else - [name]Azalea[/name] is a beatiful name and the fact that both you and your husband love it, is all the more wonderful.
Sorry that your friend is being so mean, I hope it will pass once she meets baby [name]Azalea[/name].