I am really invested in this story, but I feel like there are some flaws that I need to fix and also I would love some suggestions on how to move forward with the story and plot. Thanks!
[name_u]Snow[/name_u] glittered in the darkness like minuscule shards of moonlight, coating the forest in its cold beauty. In its midst stood a warrior. But her mind’s eye, she was not the legendary White [name_u]Warrior[/name_u], nor the rightful queen of Mirawyr. No, in this serene moment, she was just a girl; a broken girl.
For the first time in a long time, she reached up and pulled off her helmet. Snowflakes sprinkled into her hair, a stark contrast against its ebony.
She took one long look at the scene before her, reveling in its perfection. Pushing back the sense of foreboding filling her chest, she whispered, “I am [name_u]Ivory[/name_u] Regalis. Nothing can stop me.”
Though she did not want to leave the utter bliss this place gave her, [name_u]Ivory[/name_u] returned to her steed, a dazzling unicorn. She stroked her silver mane, pausing at the broken white horn atop her head. She removed her gloves and wrapped her fingers carefully around the stump. [name_u]Ivory[/name_u] squeezed her eyelids shut, focusing every ounce of her energy upon it. She didn’t have to open her eyes to know that her fingertips were glowing white. She imagined the horn entirely intact, and with her mind and energy, she pieced it back together. [name_f]Energy[/name_f] drained from her fingertips to the creature.
[name_u]Victory[/name_u] on her lips, [name_u]Ivory[/name_u] opened her eyes. The unicorn’s horn was whole once more. Immense power seemed to emanate from it.
[name_u]Ivory[/name_u] reached into the saddlebag, pulling out a worn cloth. She held it out to the unicorn.
“Zuri, find her.”
Zuri’s horn glowed, and she dropped her head to touch the cloth with it. The cloth rose from Ivory’s hand and fell to the ground a moment later. A tremor of excitement washed over the unicorn, and she let out a small whinny.
Gracefully, [name_u]Ivory[/name_u] swung her leg over the horse’s back and placed the helmet over her head once again.
“I will find you, [name_u]Indigo[/name_u], I promise,” she whispered to herself.
[name_u]Ivory[/name_u] rode the unicorn through the forest and away, blissfully unaware of the two watchful eyes peering at her through the brush.
The sun had barely shown its face when the visitor arrived at the palace. The queen was livid; all of her servants cowered before her, afraid of the wrath she may unleash upon them.
“I hope he has something good,” [name_f]Queen[/name_f] Duvessa grumbled as the hairdresser twisted her blonde locks into an elaborate style atop her head.
When her appearance was primed to perfection, she stalked out of her chambers, heels clicking furiously against the dark marble flooring.
The guards pushed opened the heavy throne room doors. Duvessa sat in her throne, fingernails digging into its velvety material.
A moment later, the doors swung open again, revealing a hooded figure. He treaded slowly across the length of the room, stopping before the queen.
He gave no recognition as to whom he was standing before. Duvessa clicked her tongue in irritation but refused to let her anger bubble to the surface.
The queen rose from her throne and addressed the man, “I do wish you would take off your hood, sir.” She said this in an enchanting voice, trying to cajole him into obeying her wishes.
The silence was brief. “I have my reasons,” he said gruffly as if to hide his real voice.
Duvessa let out an exaggerated sigh, “Very well. Why have you come so early in the morning?”
“I found her.”
The queen’s lip curled deviously. “And?”
“I saw her in the [name_u]Forest[/name_u] of [name_u]Frost[/name_u] late last night, but she departed soon after I arrived.”
The man cleared his throat. “She was headed east. She knows about…” he trailed off.
Duvessa grew impatient. Raising her voice, she said, “About what?”
“The princess. The other one. Her sister.”
The queen blinked. How?
“No matter, I will deal with this setback,” said Duvessa calmly. “Though I do have a special task for you. Kill her. The next chance you get.”
The man went as still as a statue. “Are y—you certain, your Majesty?” he said after a moment.
The queen’s lip curled maliciously. “Without a doubt, my… huntsman.”