Is it weird to choose a name knowing you’ll be using the nickname instead 24/7? For example, we are thinking of naming our daughter [name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f] and calling her [name_f]Libby[/name_f]. I’ve never had a nickname, so I wonder if it complicates life… at school, doctors office, etc… having to explain while yes this is my name I go by this instead. I know we could go with just [name_f]Libby[/name_f], but for some reason I gravitate towards choosing [name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f], because I really do like it, even though we wouldn’t often call her that. I just feel very unfamiliar with the nickname concept! I also pray she’d never become a Liz… not a fan. Give me some insight to your thoughts! Full name with nickname or just nickname as the given name? I know their will be lots of opinions… just want to hear them
Ps. [name_f]My[/name_f] sons name is [name_m]Luke[/name_m], and we chose just [name_m]Luke[/name_m] (not Lucas)
[name_f]My[/name_f] name is [name_f]Katherine[/name_f] but [name_u]Ive[/name_u] gone by [name_f]Katie[/name_f] since I was born. The only negative is that I sometimes don’t identify with my given name “Who? Oh that’s me!” I wouldn’t say it complicates things. It was never a problem in school. But its harder to get doctors etc to call me [name_f]Katie[/name_f]. I guess it depends on how their records work.
I kind of doubt [name_f]Libby[/name_f] would want to be a [name_f]Liz[/name_f] but maybe a [name_f]Lib[/name_f] or just straight up [name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f]. I’ve never wanted to be a [name_f]Katherine[/name_f] or [name_f]Kate[/name_f] at all but it would be up to her preferences.
[name_f]Nine[/name_f] times out of ten, I’m solidly in the “choose full name, use nickname” camp, and I would be here as well!
I go by a [name_u]Mars[/name_u] a lot of the time instead of [name_m]Marshall[/name_m], and I chose my name. It really doesn’t complicate things! Both my parents, two of my brothers, and many of my friends go by nicknames full-time instead of their given names (in my dad’s case he strictly goes by his middle name).
In terms of professional settings or concerning paperwork, it’s not a big deal. You just know when an exact legal name must be given, and outside of that you can simply introduce yourself using your preferred name. (“Hi I’m [nickname].” or “Nice to meet you, I’m [full name] but I go by [preferred name].”) There are exceptions of course, but no extreme ones that I can think of.
Using the longer/full name gives the child options! If they want to use their full name or a different nickname in different environments, that gives them the opportunity! However, if you are very against [name_f]Liz[/name_f], I’d avoid [name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f] seeing as your child could very well decide to go by [name_f]Liz[/name_f] later on. That’s my philosophy! (:
If you like [name_f]Libby[/name_f] and not [name_f]Liz[/name_f] then pick [name_f]Libby[/name_f]. At school, there’s a chance she won’t even get a choice but to be called by her full name (I worked in a preschool where even kids with well known nicknames were for educational purposes only referred to be their formal name… ex. “Tommy” is called Thomas) additionally that’s what all legal and whatever else you mentioned will go by.
Plus you’re taking a gamble; every person responds to nicknames differently. I have three kids: 1. Only wants to go by a nickname (not one hubby and I thought yo before birth but one toddler aged sibling created after he was born l); 2. Prefers to be called by her first and middle name 3. Prefers to be called by first name and not a nickname.
If you’re thinking, “I’m going to call them this 24/7 and do pray they don’t like this nickname…. Etc you’re taking a big risk. The likelihood is that [name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f] will often get shortened in social groups to [name_f]Liz[/name_f] or [name_f]Beth[/name_f] before it defaults to [name_f]Libby[/name_f]. By the time she reaches school / social age she’ll get to decide how often she wants to correct those two defaults, she’ll get to decide if she even like [name_f]Libby[/name_f]. She might end up hating Libby…. Especially where it’s not a common nickname. I had a child in one of my classes that I knew her by her parents given nickname… I reconnected with parents a couple years later and that girl now is going by her full name. If you’re banking so much on [name_f]Libby[/name_f] and hoping the child grows up as “Libby” then go with [name_f]Libby[/name_f]
I don’t think that’ll be complicated at all. And if you live the states (even then it might vary from state to state), you can add the nn to the ss card. So it’d be; [name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f] mn ln “Libby”, at least that’s what my dad’s parents did in the late sixtys in [name_u]Texas[/name_u], I’d look into that. So she can legally (depending on the situation) can go by either her full name or nickname.
I love both options! I tend to lean toward the formal with nickname option mostly (my son is [name_u]Maxwell[/name_u] but we call him [name_u]Max[/name_u] all the time!). But there are some “nicknamey” names that I think can totally stand alone. [name_f]Libby[/name_f] is one of them!
I actually like the zippy-ness of [name_m]Luke[/name_m] and [name_f]Libby[/name_f]! [name_m]Luke[/name_m] and [name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f] still totally work and feel very classic. If you’re not sold on [name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f], I wouldn’t feel too beholden to a “formal” name. [name_f]Libby[/name_f] totally stands on her own.
I’m an Aussie so I think a nickname is essential. If you don’t have an obvious one you will get one, so better to have one. I have several nicknames and I just introduce myself based on the level of formality that the situation requires. I’ve never found this complicated. If it helps I know many Elizabeth’s with various nicknames that they all go exclusively by including [name_f]Libby[/name_f] and [name_f]Bess[/name_f] and [name_f]Liz[/name_f] but not one of them says I’m [name_f]Libby[/name_f] and people call her [name_f]Liz[/name_f]. So I wouldn’t worry about that too much. I like names with many nickname options because it allows you to pick the one that best suits you as you grow.
[name_f]Libby[/name_f] is a weird middle ground to me. I would assume [name_m]Matt[/name_m] is really [name_m]Matthew[/name_m] and [name_u]Jess[/name_u] is really [name_f]Jessica[/name_f] but I wouldn’t necessarily assume [name_f]Sadie[/name_f] was [name_f]Sarah[/name_f] or [name_f]Peggy[/name_f] was [name_f]Margaret[/name_f]. I think I likely would assume Libby’s full name is [name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f], but that might just be the name nerd in me. I don’t know if the average person would or not. I think that matters in terms of the decision because I think with some names it’s just easier to go with the full name and nickname than to constantly explain “no really, I’m just [name_u]Alex[/name_u], not Alexander.”
For what it’s worth though I also don’t think it would be common for her to get called [name_f]Liz[/name_f] or [name_f]Lizzie[/name_f] or [name_f]Beth[/name_f] because she’d typically be introducing herself as [name_f]Libby[/name_f]. I have three friends (who don’t know each other) named [name_f]Katherine[/name_f] who go by [name_f]Kat[/name_f], [name_f]Kate[/name_f] and [name_f]Katie[/name_f] and to my knowledge they don’t have a problem with people calling them the “wrong” nickname, but of course I’m not speaking from first hand experience.
I personally am in the “always go with the full name” camp 99% of the time, but I do actually think [name_m]Luke[/name_m] & [name_f]Libby[/name_f] sounds better than [name_m]Luke[/name_m] & [name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f].
[name_f]My[/name_f] position is different depending on whether the diminutive sounds like a formal name in its own right - for example, if you were wanting to use [name_f]Eliza[/name_f] day to day I wouldn’t see the point in the full name [name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f] as [name_f]Eliza[/name_f] is a formal stand-alone. However some diminutives are definitely ‘nicknamey’ and I feel [name_f]Libby[/name_f] fits into this category, and in such cases I feel it’s to the child’s benefit to have the option of a more formal birth certificate name as they grow up, even if they’re going to be known and introduced as [name_f]Libby[/name_f] all the time. It just gives options for when she’s older, and most forms now contain a formal name and ‘known as’ section to avoid any confusion as to how to address someone.
To add to that - if you introduce as [name_f]Libby[/name_f], I don’t think there’s any danger of [name_f]Liz[/name_f] while she’s little, but obviously the child may grow up to have preferences of her own re the diminutive which differ to yours.
I think plenty of people go nearly exclusively by a nickname while having a longer name (especially with a classic like Elizabeth). Most people know about [name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f] ‘Libby’ so it doesn’t feel hard to explain, plus, most forms/records/school stuff allow you to put a preferred name down - ie. at school, for example, she could have [name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f] as her legal name, but registers and ID cards would refer to her as [name_f]Libby[/name_f].
For me, I’d just go with [name_f]Libby[/name_f] because a) I prefer it, b) it would avoid the other nicknames that I might not like, c) I like nicknamey names and think [name_f]Libby[/name_f] works alone. But, I see nothing wrong with using [name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f] if that feels right to you.
I’m a [name_f]Stephanie[/name_f] but my parents called me [name_u]Steph[/name_u] right out of the gate. The vast majority of people I know, know me as [name_u]Steph[/name_u]. [name_f]My[/name_f] husband calls me Stephie which I used to dislike (because people spelled it [name_f]Steffi[/name_f] more often than not) but now I actually prefer it and want to use it more widely. In my university department, my tutors and peers call me [name_f]Stephanie[/name_f] because I never offered the nickname and I actually like the distance, it makes me feel more professional in that context. I like that I can choose full name or nickname depending on the situation.
[name_f]My[/name_f] husband is a [name_m]Christopher[/name_m] and has been known as [name_u]Chris[/name_u] his whole life. He hates [name_u]Chris[/name_u] because it’s the name of another family member, who he was named after, and he just associates it with that person. It doesn’t feel like it belongs to him. So, I call him [name_u]Kit[/name_u], and he’s switching to that with our friends and any new people we meet. His parents refuse to call him anything but [name_u]Chris[/name_u], which to him, doesn’t even feel like his name.
Tl;dr, I like the flexibility that a longer name with nicknames creates, but don’t assume you can choose which variation your kid will go by, because they might feel very differently about it to you.
Give her the full name 100%. That way she has options should she ‘outgrow’ [name_f]Libby[/name_f]. I was given a nickname name and hated it so much I changed it back to what it’s longer form should be
I’d say it really depends on the reasoning/specific name. So for example, if [name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f] were a family name you wanted to use in its full form but liked [name_f]Libby[/name_f] much better, I think it would make total sense (similar to the concept of middle names that are planned to be used in day to day life, if there’s a a certain reason they want to use a specific name as a first name even if it’s not a name they love. I know a couple people in this situation.)
While I generally lean against planned nicknames that don’t have a specific sentimental-type reason, there are still a couple situations where I think it’s understandable, namely when the name you want to use is very nicknamey and might feel weird on its own (which I assume would be your reasoning with Libby). For me personally there are a few names I like where this is the case and I’d plan on using the nickname form most of the time but have the full version as the legal name, though in my situation I still like the full versions and wouldn’t horribly mind hearing it used. Furthermore, my personal reasoning for using the full name would be more out of worry that they would dislike the nickname and much prefer to use the full version, as it would be much more confusing and difficult to have a legal nickname name and go by the full version exclusively than to have a full name you never use.
But if you absolutely could NOT stand the idea of [name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f] (or to a lesser extent a different nickname) to ever end up being used for her, I’d say just go with [name_f]Libby[/name_f] on its own. I do know multiple people with nickname names who have never minded it, even if it did cause occasional confusion. The only time where I’d say you absolutely shouldn’t use a nickname as a full name is if it were very obscure/weird, and I wouldn’t say [name_f]Libby[/name_f] falls into that category.
Weird? Yes. But do people do it aaaall the time? Also yes. It’s super common.
I’m with you. I think it’s weird, and I made a concerted decision to name my kids what they would be called.
I would not worry about a “nickname” name not being “name-enough.” That’s literally how new names come into usage.
(Henry is a nn for Heinrich. Charles might have been short for Charlemagne. Liam short for William. Tina short for Christina? Rudy short for Rudyard or Gertrude. Plus all those big Anglosaxon names that hav shorter, more contemporaneous-looking “nicknames” that have become our “traditonal” names)
I have had a similar experience: my name is Mercedes but I’ve gone by Sadie for my whole life. My doctor’s office has a line for preferred name on all of their paperwork so they also call me Sadie. My parents chose Mercedes to give me options in case I didn’t want to be Sadie for my whole life but ironically, that is what I want to go by.
Like others have said, giving your child a formal name gives him options. The only downside I can think of to using [name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f] is that she may want to experiment with nicknames as she grows; there are so many associated with it. It’s totally different, but [name_u]Liberty[/name_u] also gets you to [name_f]Libby[/name_f] without all the other options.
I live in the land of nicknames (UK) where everyone either has a nickname name or purely goes by a nickname. Personally I find nicknames very natural and find that whatever chosen name people go for it’s used, respected and doesn’t complicate things at all.
[name_m]Just[/name_m] for example I have a friend who has three children all that go by a nickname exclusively they are Regin@ld ‘Reggi3’, Fr@ncis ‘Franki3’ and M@rgaret-R0se ‘P3ggy-R0se’ no one ever calls her children any other name aside from these chosen nicknames. It’s not weird. Her children do not find it weird. So in my eyes I do not understand why your [name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f] ‘Libby’ would be any different. I also find that educators respect what parents choose to call their children. [name_f]My[/name_f] child has recently started preschool on the form there was a specific box which specifically asked what name your child goes by and I put my child’s dominant nickname Lils in that box she’s known as Lils at nursery. Schools do respect chosen nicknames I would not worry about this. Regarding [name_f]Liz[/name_f] it depends on what name your child identifies with but if your child identifies [name_f]Libby[/name_f] then that’s that. Honestly I think [name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f] ‘Libby’ is beautiful. I’m experiencing name envy!!
“Who? Oh that’s me!” I wouldn’t say it complicates things. It was never a problem in school. But its harder to get doctors etc to call me [name_f]Katie[/name_f]. I guess it depends on how their records work.