Is it just me or...

Is it just me or do nameberry members all seem to have more children than an “average” family? I feel like [name]IRL[/name], we most often meet families with 2-3 kids, but on nameberry, alot of people are naming #4, 5, or 6. This is definitely more children than average. Any thoughts?

We’re having twins #3 and #4 for us and always wanted a large family, so I’m in no way saying this is a bad thing, but I just feel like I never see this many “larger” families!

No, I think you’re right…but I also think it depends on people’s location, you know? I live in New [name]York[/name] City, and a lot of our friends around here have only one or two children (especially couples around my age…mid-30s). But actually, most of our friends out on [name]Long[/name] Island and upstate (more suburban and even rural areas) have more children; we’re friends with two separate couples each with six children. My partner and I are both from larger families, and we wanted four children, but we’re expecting twins too so it’ll be five altogether. We’re moving out to [name]Long[/name] Island in [name]September[/name] into a pretty big house. :slight_smile:

But really, it’s a very interesting observation…perhaps a lot of people are also simply planning for their future children?

We live in the midwest and I do see some slightly bigger families, but still don’t know many with more than 4! lol

My other theory was just that maybe when people have 3 or 4, they “run out of” favorite names and look to internet boards to bounce off ideas?

Congrats on your twins! Our twin girls are due in [name]December[/name] (I had to edit this… why did I write [name]September[/name]? lol)
I also just peaked at your profile and think it’s very cool you are an aspiring doc. my dh is in his residency-- it’s been a long road (which feels like it’s neverending) but he loves his career.

Yeah, that’s another good reason…after we used the names [name]Camille[/name] and [name]Caroline[/name] (her middle name), which we’ve both always loved, we definitely needed to do some research, lol.

Thank you, and same to you! I accidentally blurted out today that I wished we were having twin girls (because I like more girls’ names, haha) so I guess I’m kind of jealous of you guys! What names are you thinking of? We’re so incredibly conflicted, especially because we just found out today!

Congrats to your husband too…I can’t wait for that point in my life, even though I know it will be insanely stressful (if it even happens). I’m actually still in the midst of completing my post-bacc premed program so I can apply to med schools later on in life. It’s pretty unlikely, but I can dream. What residency is your husband doing?

I’ve noticed this too! Most people I know have one or two kids. I know quite a few people with 3 kids, but I’ve hardly met any families with more than 3 children. I do know one family with five kids (all K names) and people constantly comment on it.

So far I only have one, but that’s only because we’re just starting. We want between 4 and 7. Haha, and my mom seems to think 3 would be way too many. I’ve noticed that people my age (25, so haven’t been having kids very long) seem to want big families. I wonder if that’s because most of us grew up in small families, and we want something different for our kids.

I noticed this as well. Maybe it’s locational? I too live in New [name]York[/name] City and grew up here. [name]Every[/name] single kid I grew up with was either an only child or had one sister or brother. I knew one girl in high school who was from a family of four kids and I knew a small handful of families with three. In the city it’s tough to have more than two kids unless you live in a nice sized apartment, and with private schools being ridiculously expensive (plenty go to public school but lots go to private as well) and the cost of living in Manhattan being so high, most families can only afford two. But then I think of my cousins. My Mom’s the oldest of four and has a brother with six kids and a sister with four, both of which live in New [name]Jersey[/name]. My Dad’s the oldest of three, his sister has five kids (they live in Westchester) and his brother has three (Connecticut). So for me, it’s weird to imagine families of more than four but I know they exist. I do think that people might come to Name [name]Berry[/name] the second, third, fourth, etc time versus with the first child, because its much easier (for most) to pick the first childs name (a name you’ve loved forever, a family name, a [name]Jr[/name]., etc.) and then the next time you worry if the name fits, if it matches, if you should avoid similar sounds/letters, if you need to use another family name, etc. And each time it becomes progressively harder (see: the Duggars).

Its definitely a regional thing. We recently moved across the country and noticed that there are alot more big families here than where we lived before. We also moved from a bigger city to “suburbia”…

Well, I do think that Nameberries seem to have larger than average families! Maybe they just like naming things!=)

BTW, my DH is in the process of applying to med school right now! Very nervous about it all!

@crunchymama-Did you have kids before or during Med School?

[name]Phoebe[/name]'smom-
PM me if you wanna chat med school or have any questions! I was telling [name]Jay[/name] today that while I’m not a doctor and have never taken a medical school course… I feel like I “should” be because I’ve been through it every step of the way. DH and I started dated when he was a premed.

We had [name]Carly[/name] during DH’s last weeks of his undergrad. (we were young, she wasn’t planned. I learned and grew so much from the experience that I wouldn’t change one part of it, but it was definitely not in either of our short term plans at the time)
[name]Penny[/name] was born during 3rd yr of med school, which is supposedly the hardest. So, we made that work too.
Now he’s a 5th yr resident.

Good luck to your hubby and family! It’s a tough road and honestly it’s not glamorous, but my DH loves his job and it just works for our family.

I definitely think that it has to do with the naming getting harder with each progressive child.

I have another theory, too, although it is perhaps unfounded : I suspect some people like names because they like children. I first got interested in names because I have always loved children, and liked to think of names for my future children when I was still a child, too, although now I have the added linguistic aspect to my interest. And then I would say that people like me, who have always adored children, would be more likely to plan to have more than two. I like noise, I like mess! Whether that becomes a reality or not is of course a different matter, depending on lots of factors, but if you planned to have 3+ children then I don’t doubt you are more likely to end up having 3+ children than someone who only dreamed of one.

On a matter related to what I just wrote but not at all to the original topic, I read something very interesting a little while ago about “missing” children - a massive survey was conducted where young women (teens and early 20s, before they had a child) were asked how many children they wanted. Decades later, the same women, now in their 50s and so considered to be a safe bet for having no more children, were asked how many children they actually had. I think it might have been a government nationwide thing here in the UK, and there were tens of thousands of “missing” children who never ended up becoming a reality.

Good luck to all of you aspiring medics!
[name]Auburn[/name]

[name]Auburn[/name]- that article sounds so interesting! I’m gonna try to google around tomorrow and see if I can find anything on it or similar stories. I’m such a nerd sometmes! lol

I definitely subscribe to your liking kids and liking names theory!

I’m happy so many here have larger families. When we got married I told my friends we planned to have 4-6+ kids. No one believed me. They said that was too many and we’d change our minds. When I was a teenager, I always said the same thing (4-6 kids!) I don’t think DH really believed me when we first got together. I’m really happy he’s just as into the idea as me now.

Oh wow this topic is so interesting to me because it’s something I’ve given a lot of thought to myself! Maybe it’s a case of wanting what you didn’t have? Or grass is always greener?

My mum was one of 7 children and felt like she didn’t get as much attention growing up as she would have liked and never wanted a lot of children. She had me, and I basically grew up an only child (which I hated!) and then had my baby sister when I was 13, so we’ve both kind of grown up seperately. I sometimes say my mum had two “only children”. My sister’s turning 11 this month so it’s still too young to really tell how she’ll feel when she’s older, but I certainly want a large family and always have. I know that you never can tell what will happen but I feel almost certain I’d have at least 4 children and, depending on finances etc, I’d consider anything up to 6,7, maybe even 8 if the last ones were twins! Haha. I think 4-6 would be ideal though. I think growing up an only child, yes I got a lot of adult attention but I really wanted the company of another little person my age to share all the memories etc with. I adore my sister but I’m more like her 3rd parent than sister most of the time since I’m 24 now. I think both me and my mum want the opposite for our children of what we had. Maybe my children will only want one or two!

My partner is the same. He has one sister who’s about 8 years older than him and we really bonded initially over both wanting a big family. I thought I was the only one who dreamt about having lots of children one day even when I was only a child myself (probably since the age of 7-8!) but turns out he was the same. We both feel minimum 4 and we’d be happy. I’m sure lots of people with children will tell me I’ll feel differently when the time comes but I really don’t think I will.

As someone else said, I think maybe it is a generational thing. Generally my generation grew up in smaller families so maybe we’ve romanticised the idea of having lots of brothers and sisters and lots of mess and chaos and love! I would never want to have more children than I had time for though because I don’t want any to feel that they didn’t get enough love and attention.

My mum doesn’t really know how many children I’d like but she has said that she thinks it’s “selfish” of people to have more than 2 or 3 children. I don’t understand this opinion. I think it’s selfish to have more children than you can care for and support, but as long as you have the time, energy and finances to do it I think people should have as many children as feels right for them.

Having said all that, I know a few people my age and a little older with one or two children who say there’s no way they’d have more. So maybe it is a nameberry thing! Or at least a link between loving children and loving names.

[name]How[/name] many of you, like me, have been picking out your childrens names since you were a child yourself? And I think there’s more joy to it then just the love of names, at least for me. Yes I loved the names but I also loved imagining the family I could one day create, the faces, genders, ages, personalities etc. So maybe name lovers tend to be people who dream of bigger families and maybe many are now making those dreams reality?

Sorry for rambling! I always do lol.

I think its regional and money related. I too live in NYC and I grew up and know plenty of families that have more than three kids and still manage to live in a 3 bedroom apartment or more depending on which borough they live in.

Also money wise not all are middle class or upper class with more than three children. I think some people just feel the need to keep adding on to the family or the baby is a “oops!”. I’ve seen a lot and know a lot of single moms who have 3 or more kids.

Also geography wise more people tend too have more kids upstate NY and down south in the more rural and less populated areas. The midwest have larger families too and [name]California[/name] a lot of people stick to 2-3 because houses in [name]California[/name] the bigger they get the more expensive and they can’t afford it.

Well, i consider myself also a third ‘one’ child. My big brothers are 8 and 9 years older. I always dreamed (since i was 10 or so) to have lots of baby’s. At least 4, but id like 6 too! If i have a supporting husband and the finances that is! I dont want my child/ren to need to wear each others clothes or not being able to provide for them.

I guess, since i didnt have siblings to grow up with (they were grown up when i was trying to grow up, i am still trying) i want my children to have lots of siblings. I want a happy family, with 4 to 6 kids, and i wouldnt mind more! I loved names since i think 2004 (?) when The Sims 2 came out and i made myself and made a family for me and always trying to find the perfect names. In that game i could do anything, from a [name]Penelope[/name] to a [name]Kieran[/name] or an [name]Aurora[/name]. [name]IRL[/name] the english R or the really english sounding names are difficult for my family to pronounce, so i dont think ill ever have an [name]Aurora[/name].

It is only recent, since i found this site, that i am starting to get an intrest in names with there meaning. Therefore i had to like the sound and the look, hence my liking for unisex names. I dont know why but i love those names, they sound so good (on girls) for me. I would never want my son to have a unisex name if i ever heard/saw/knew it ever had been used on a girl. Maybe its the fact that i grew up with 2 brothers, and 2 neighbor (sp?) boys and thats why i am kind of a boy myself. Im hardly what you call a girly girl. I dont like makeup or earrings, or bracelets or necklaces or rings or purses. So yeah.