I have a bit of a tricky situation! My little girl is 11 months old and I really, really want to change her name!
Basically, towards the very end of my pregnancy, I was asked if we’d thought of any names for the baby and I made the mistake of revealing some of them. The original/favourite name we’d chosen was endlessly ridiculed by our families (Harlow), we opted for our second choice (Summer), only to be told it was a “stripper’s name” and then we were totally stumped! In the end, we settled for the name everybody else liked the best (Amber), even though it was quite low down on our list.
I haven’t warmed to her name at all and I don’t feel it suits her. The funny thing is, I don’t even want to change it to our original choice but rather our second choice. It would fit her so perfectly!
I’ve tried so hard to “get over” it but almost a year later and that’s proven impossible. One of my favourite movies is 500 days of Summer and I can’t even bear to watch it because it reminds me of the name she should have. That might sound really silly but I can’t help feeling really upset about the whole situation. I almost feel like everybody else named her for us and that makes me feel so sad.
We barely ever use her name and instead call her Princess or Cupcake, but if we’d called her Summer, I would definitely use it because I think it’s such a lovely name!
Would it be too late and too awkward to change her name? X
I feel sorry that you felt pressured not to use the name/s you loved due to outside influence, even if it was your loved ones.
This is obviously really bugging you, and you don’t want to spend the rest of your child’s life avoiding calling her by name beacuse it’s too painful. She’s your daughter, and she will have this name for the rest of her life, so you want it to be the best one you can think of. If you’re going to do it, now is the time, before she can speak and remember that she wasn’t always a [name]Summer[/name].
Maybe reduce confusion with family by calling her [name]Summer[/name] [name]Amber[/name]? That’s quite a pretty combination
I say change it. It would be sad to stick with a name that you don’t really like and don’t think fits your daughter well. The fact that you don’t use [name]Amber[/name] very often will help ease the transition since she isn’t accustomed to being called that anyway.
That is a shame! Normally I would hesitate about changing a child’s name around a year old, but you seem to have one firmly in mind (it’s more the people who can’t decide and are really anxious about the present choice whom I’d caution). I agree that it’d be better to do it sooner rather than later if you are going to change it. You might still want to do a brief test, though, and spend a few days or a week calling her [name]Summer[/name] to make sure you both feel it’s the one.
I would change it. Start calling her [name]Summer[/name] now while you do the paperwork… I love the name [name]Summer[/name] and think [name]Amber[/name] sounds more like a stripped name [name]Imo[/name].
A lot of berries freak out about changing a child’s name but I say do it, the sooner the better. Your child will respond to whatever you call her, she does not yet understand that [name]Amber[/name] = her.
It’s funny that the family struck down [name]Summer[/name] but loved [name]Amber[/name]. That name screams stripper to me.
I love [name]Harlow[/name], and [name]Summer[/name] is great too
I agree with everyone else. The sooner you start calling her [name]Summer[/name] and change her name, the better. Since you and your partner aren’t using [name]Amber[/name], it will make the switch easier.
I agree with pps that normally I would hesitate about changing a baby’s name at this age, but it really seems like the best choice in your situation. [name]Summer[/name] is kind of a nicknamey name anyway so it would be easy to make the transition, especially since you’ve been calling her nicknames anyway! I don’t really like [name]Summer[/name] [name]Amber[/name] together though, I would advise against that. [name]Summer[/name] is lovely. I say do it! Good luck!
I think legally you only have up to one year to change her name without it bring a big hassle. (Dont quote me on that, I may be thinking of last names but for some reason its stuck in my head that its not as difficult/expensive to change it before her first year) Good luck!
Change it while you can do it without a big ordeal. If you rarely use [name]Amber[/name] with her, she won’t notice the change. Start [name]Summer[/name] immediately and I don’t think it’ll be a problem. Your biggest hurdle will be getting your family to start calling her [name]Summer[/name].
I’d just be as honest as possible, you’re having trouble with her name, your daughter just feels like a [name]Summer[/name], you want her to have the perfect name and as much as you wanted to compromise, it isn’t [name]Amber[/name].
Keep [name]Amber[/name] in the middle if that will help ease the transition for family, [name]Summer[/name] [name]Amber[/name] is rather nice.
I have seen several people that wanted to change their kids names on here and I always said don’t change but in this case I might so go for it. I would keep her birth first name in her name though. You could make it [name]Summer[/name] [name]Amber[/name] (other birth middle name)_____. [name]Summer[/name] is a nice name and I don’t see it as a stripper name; their are deff worse ones out there. Good luck and remember it is your daughter not your families daughter. All the best xx
I never understand the issue of changing children’s first names. As important as a first name is, it is by no means sacred. Change it to what makes you happy.
The worst thing that can happen is your baby girl doesn’t like it when she grows up and she can always change it again to her heart’s desire.
I made the same mistake with my family & had[name]Marigold[/name] ruined for me! I feel so sad that you were bullied even more, to the point that your family basically picked a name off the list!
I agree with all of the posters who said go for it, but I wonder how your family will take to it. It sounds like they’re used to bossing you around
I say change it as well! The fact that you know exactly what her name should be speaks volumes compared to others who have questioned their name choice for their children. [name]Summer[/name] is, in my opinion a superior name to [name]Amber[/name] too! I keep being tempted to discuss our name options with family and friends but thank you for the reminder that it the opinions that matter are mine and my husbands!
Change it. [name]Summer[/name] is lovely-[name]Amber[/name] not so. As long as you put a nice middle name in (I’m not a fan of [name]Summer[/name] [name]Amber[/name]-too many mmms) I’d be interested to see what mn you picked for [name]Amber[/name] to see more of what your naming style is then I can gve some suggestions.
I would say change it now since your daughter is so young. If you wait much longer then it will be an issue and then you’ll be stuck with a name you don’t really like. I agree with others that you should start calling her [name]Summer[/name] now and start on the official paperwork, that way even if the official name change takes awhile, your daughter will be used to being called [name]Summer[/name] by that point.
I would change it. You could also opt for the [name]Sumer[/name] spelling (that’s how my cousin’s name is spelled, her mom chose to do that to avoid it relating to the season)
[name]Do[/name] it! I think changing a baby’s name is questionable but not if you’re sure of what you would change it to. For goodness sake though, promise that you won’t be discussing names with your family during pregnancy if you have another child!! It’s your baby and you’re the one that will be using that name every day!
(Also a good reminder to me during this pregnancy to only discuss names with DH and those who I know love our style!)
[name]Amber[/name] strikes me as more “stripper-ish” to be honest! I think [name]Summer[/name] is very cute (and I like [name]Zooey[/name] Deschanel so much, too!). I knew a girl named [name]Summer[/name] when I was younger. She was very easily the star forward of our soccer team: tiny and very fast! Her dad (our coach) was really nice too, so I have good associations with the name. I also think you should use the original spelling [name]Summer[/name] as [name]Sumer[/name] is an ancient civilization in what was Mesopotamia… sixth grade ancient history might get a bit awkward, haha.
That said, I think [name]Summer[/name] [name]Amber[/name] is not a nice combo. They both have the m’s as well as an -er ending and don’t mesh well. Also, I think having [name]Amber[/name] in the name will encourage your family not to give it up and will be a painful reminder of your struggle to follow your gut and name her as you like. What is the current middle name? I think you should keep it and use [name]Summer[/name] exclusively as the first name, throwing [name]Amber[/name] out all together. If [name]Amber[/name] remains in the name, I really think it will give your family the impression that the name [name]Amber[/name] is still part of your daughters identity when it clearly is not wanted.
Good luck! I think your gut is telling you that [name]Amber[/name] is not who your daughter is. You are kind of getting a second chance after not listening to your heart the first time, and your SO seems on board!
