Is this name stealing?

My cousin named her baby [name_f]Rosie[/name_f] [name_f]Matilda[/name_f] a few months ago. I was disappointed because I am considering the combo [name_f]Rose[/name_f] [name_f]Madeline[/name_f], nn [name_f]Rosie[/name_f]. (I also want to use [name_f]Matilda[/name_f]/ [name_f]Matilde[/name_f] as a middle name. It is the name of a shared family member between me and my cousin. But not for [name_f]Rose[/name_f]. ).

My cousin lives in another state, and we’re not close (she’s several years older than me), so it’s not like our Rosies would ever meet. She also has a different last name.
I’m just worried that [name_f]Rose[/name_f] [name_f]Madeline[/name_f] is too similar to [name_f]Rosie[/name_f] [name_f]Matilda[/name_f], especially since we’d probably call her [name_f]Rosie[/name_f], and if we had a girl first, she’d be born a year or two after the other [name_f]Rosie[/name_f].
Would it look like we’re copying?

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Yes, it might look that way, but if you aren’t close (and your immediate family and friends aren’t close with her either) then I think it’s a nonissue.

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Firstly both [name_f]Rosie[/name_f] [name_f]Matilda[/name_f] & [name_f]Rose[/name_f] [name_f]Madeline[/name_f] are gorgeous names :rose:

Secondly I agree with @SparkleNinja18 it may look like name stealing or whatever but I wouldn’t stress as your not close and if your immediate circle isn’t close either then it’s not an issue. Use the name you love.

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You’re good. Use it.

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I would consider it name stealing if the circumstances were different but it looks like they would never even meet so I think you’re in the clear

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My husbands cousin gave their daughter the same first name as our daughter. And honestly I was flattered, so was my daughter. (There is 13 years between them)

I think of you love a name then go for it. Its sweet for second cousins to have a name match :heart:

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Oh, how beautiful are [name_f]Rosie[/name_f] [name_f]Matilda[/name_f] and [name_f]Rose[/name_f] [name_f]Madeline[/name_f]?! :heart:

I don’t think you should stress over it too terribly much, it isn’t as if you chose [name_f]Rose[/name_f] [name_f]Mathilde[/name_f]. If you’re awfully worried, maybe spell [name_f]Rosie[/name_f] with a ‘y’, [name_f]Rosy[/name_f]? Though, if you aren’t close and they are years apart it’s most likely not a big deal! In the end, don’t let someone else deter you from using names you love! xx

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I’m definitely not the person to comment my opinion, as I’m not even comfortable using the same name my cousin used for his (now deceased) dog. Uniqueness is top priority for me! Instead I’ll just pose some questions/ideas about your situation for you to consider :slight_smile:

My biggest concern would be overlap and confusion for your family.

Being cousins, will that mean your children will share great-grandparents? Are they still living? Having two great-grandkids with the same name could definitely be awkward for them, so that’s worth considering.
Are your parents close with your cousin or her parents? How do you anticipate they would differentiate between the kids? Alternative names might offer more options, such as [name_f]Rosemary[/name_f] instead of just [name_f]Rose[/name_f]. A shorter middle to go with [name_f]Rose[/name_f], like [name_f]Rose[/name_f] [name_f]Grace[/name_f]. A different middle initial to go by, like [name_f]Rose[/name_f] [name_f]Juliette[/name_f] aka RJ.

My other concern is how your cousin would feel about it. With a pretty common name like [name_f]Rose[/name_f], she was probably aware her child would meet others, but she might be uncomfortable with having another one in the family (same gen). Depending on your personality/relationship, this conversation might be “I’m letting you know” moreso than “would it be okay”, but either way, I think this is an important conversation to have.

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To be honest, despite the fact that you’re clearly NOT stealing, it most likely would look that way. That’s so unfortunate. However, I could see it being fine to keep one of the names. For example, I share a middle name with a cousin that I am very close to, and it’s not weird at all. So I can easily see cousins who are not close both with daughters named [name_f]Rose[/name_f]/Rosie being fine! But with such a similar middle name, it might be a bit much. So you might consider finding a more distinct middle name for [name_f]Rose[/name_f] and using [name_f]Madeline[/name_f] in another combo.

HOWEVER, I do think you don’t necessarily need to care about how it might look to other people in your family. You clearly loved [name_f]Rose[/name_f] [name_f]Madeline[/name_f] beforehand, and it would be sad for you to have to give it up because of someone you’re not even close to. You could probably just use it and, if anyone comments on the similarity, just explain that you had already decided on the name before your cousin named [name_f]Rosie[/name_f] [name_f]Matilda[/name_f]. :slight_smile:

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Hi there.

I wouldn’t worry about it. [name_f]My[/name_f] dh has 20 something first cousins, & I decided that I wouldn’t worry about using the same name as any of them. There are just too many, & we’re only close to a few. The ones that we’re close to, I wouldn’t use the same name as. The ones that we see at most once year, I wouldn’t let it stress me out. [name_f]Rose[/name_f] [name_f]Madeline[/name_f] is gorgeous.

Hope this helps. :slight_smile:

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I’m guessing that you and your cousin aren’t close and never see each other given that you said your Rosies would never meet. In which case, go ahead and name your kid whatever you want and if some other relative thinks that you copied the name, oh well.

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If you were close and saw each other at family holidays often, it might be too close. But because this isn’t true, I think it’s fine. The names I’ve chosen for my last baby have already been used by my cousins throughout my extended family. If my brother were using them, or a close cousin, I wouldn’t. But my baby and their cousin with the same name will probably never even meet. I’m not willing to lose a name I love for someone I never talk to or see. Hopefully they’ll take it as a compliment and your cousin will too!

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It may appear to be name stealing, but if you aren’t close with them, I don’t think it’s a problem!

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I don’t think anyone can safely say this won’t upset your cousin.
An y family you have in common might also be confused.
Discussing this with your cousin could prove awkward and it’s hard when put on the spot to express feeling sometimes so I wouldn’t rely on that either.
I wouldn’t worry about the middle names being similar but the first names that’s really close for closely related family members.
We have a lot of long distance cousins and while some we may never even visit… We did cross off their children’s names if they were or were similar to names we agreed we liked, but that’s just how we feel about it personally.
I wouldn’t want to use a name someone else had used in our family and I think it would really bother me if someone else wanted to use something close to one of ours.
People can have some pretty big feelings about things and I would just suggest you consider other options I think maybe before giving your child a very similar name to a cousin and having that be the first thing everyone thinks when they hear what you’ve named her. [name_f]Rose[/name_f] is so pretty and classic and that should be the response to the name, I think a lot of parents struggle with choosing the perfect names, especially with so many taken already but sometimes there’s just a perfect name waiting out there you wouldn’t have considered otherwise!

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I agree with elanorelle :slight_smile:

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It would look a bit like you’re copying. If I’m honest, I would personally choose something else.

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I agree with what most people are saying, I think that even though you’re not stealing or copying, it will appear that way. As long as you’re comfortable holding your head up high and batting off any potential comments about it, I think you’re fine. If it’s a name that’s really important to you, message her and say, this is really awkward but I just wanted to let you know we’re naming our baby [name_f]Rose[/name_f] [name_f]Madeline[/name_f], it’s a name I chose long ago and it’s very important to me, I just wanted to let you know out of courtesy. :+1:

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absolutely agree, but skip the “this is awkward” part :slight_smile:

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Name similarity is rife in my family. I have 3 cousins [name_f]Jennifer[/name_f] (1m2p) 2 cousins named [name_m]Peter[/name_m],
2 cousins named [name_m]Geoffrey[/name_m]/Jeffrey (not sure of the spelling) and 1 daughter and 2 cousins named [name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f], plus one cousin and 1 grandson named [name_m]Christopher[/name_m]. It has never bothered our family and it was mainly 2 sisters who who used the same names. It is only an issue if people make it one. No one owns a name,

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i’m sorry to hear that but it is stealing and very similar you could keep the middle name

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