I am 15 weeks. We aren’t finding out the gender. This is our first baby.
My husband LOVES the name [name]Jack[/name]. LOVES. Has always wanted a son named [name]Jack[/name]. Not [name]Jackson[/name], just [name]Jack[/name].
I do not care for the name. And, I do not like the nn - [name]Jack[/name]-o, [name]Jackie[/name], etc. Also, I think [name]Jack[/name] is pretty popular and I have THE most popular girls’ name in the US from the 70s. I went through my entire life being called by my first AND last names b/c there were so many of us. I wanted to give my kids more unique names, but still easy-to-pronounce.
Has anyone here named their baby a name they didn’t like?
We have a fairly long last name that begins with R and ends with N, so we are avoiding names that end in both R and N. We are also trying to keep it shorter b/c of the long last name. [name]Jack[/name] obviously fits this. I just don’t like it.
Thanks. I think I am just venting. I thought this would be a fun part of the process, but it’s just not. I feel very detached from the baby because we can’t agree on any names. (I know, first world problem.)
Aw, that’s tough. We also aren’t finding out the baby’s gender, but if it’s a boy are going to use a name that I don’t love. But my hubby is very adamant about it because it was his grandfather’s name. However, because he chose the boy name I get to choose whatever I want for the girl name. Personally, I really like the name [name]Jack[/name]. But if you don’t like it I think that your husband should be able to compromise…unless it is sentimental for some reason. Find a bunch of names that you love and let him pick from your list! If he won’t budge, I’m sure [name]Jack[/name] will grow on you eventually. I started out hating our boy name, [name]Saul[/name], but the more that I get used to it and picture my little baby with the name the more I start to really like it.
Good luck!
My daughter’s name is [name]Grace[/name] [name]Patricia[/name]. My husband loves, LOVES, the name [name]Grace[/name]. While I think that it is a beautiful name, I think it is very popular and not really my style. We weren’t really able to talk about names because I was very sick when I was pregnant. I don’t remember talking about first names, but I do remember talking DH out of naming her [name]Grace[/name] [name]Marie[/name]. I have struggled for a very long time (she’s over two now) about her name. I mostly call her [name]Pat[/name], [name]Gracie[/name] [name]Pat[/name], [name]Patsy[/name], and [name]Patty[/name] (as well as a slew of other nicknames that have no resemblance to either of her names).
I have never blamed my husband that she was named something that I didn’t like; neither of us could have forseen that I would be so sick while pregnant, but now, even before ttc again, we are trying to find a name for another baby. He feels awful that I don’t really like our daughter’s name and he is doing everything he can think of to make it right.
I [name]DO[/name] NOT suggest that you name your baby a name that you dislike. Explain to your husband that this is a big deal for you and that you need to find a name that you two can agree on. This is just another example of compromise and communication in marriage.
My suggestion is for each of you to make a list of names that you like and then hand it to the other. If you cross off a name on his list or vice versa, you can’t bring it up again. Also, see if there are any names that are the same or similar- you may find the perfect name this way. If not, at least you’ll find out the style of names that each of you like and that can help you narrow down the never-ending name options.
Thank you for your replies. I think I have given my husband false hope by not disregarding it altogether. I don’t HATE the name, I just don’t really like it. I would prefer for us to agree on a name vs. one having to compromise. Who knew this would be so hard?
I know that some of the names I like are a bit more trendy, and my husband’s argument is that as an adult, someone with a recognizeable, easy-to-pronounce name is going to be more successful (there have been articles written about this phenomenon). I obviously don’t want to risk my child’s future just because I like a weird name!
FWIW, I like thenames [name]Grace[/name] and [name]Saul[/name].
I wouldn’t take too much stock in that phenomenon. It’s not as true as you think. If you like a more unusual name, I would pick one that could have a more recognizable nickname. (Names aren’t going to become common unless we use them!) Some examples
[name]Gregorio[/name] nn [name]Greg[/name]
[name]Sampson[/name] nn [name]Sam[/name]
[name]Davenport[/name] nn [name]Dave[/name]
The way I got my husband to fall in love with the name, [name]Evangeline[/name] (a name I have loved ever since watching [name]Nanny[/name] [name]McPhee[/name]) was getting him hooked on the tv show Lost. He’s big on associations and seeing a person with an unusual name made it easier for him love. Because someone famous had this name, it made it “ok” for him to like it, too because it made it less unusual. Your husband may like, even love, some more unusual names, but he may not have been given “permission” to like it.
However, I do agree that a more unusual name could prove to be more difficult. It will be your child’s name for the rest of his life. That’s a big deal.
There is a way you can overcome this by picking a classic, but underused name. My name is [name]Leah[/name] and growing up, I was the only [name]Leah[/name] in all of my classes. Sometimes people would mispronounce or misspell it but it didn’t happen often. If you don’t want a common name, I would go with the bottom half of the top 100 and lower, but that doesn’t guarantee that your son will be the only one in his class with a certain name.
Although I don’t really think that an unusual name will be a problem in a few years and I don’t think that a common name will be as common as you think. More and More parents are choosing different names for their children and the number of children with the top names have been cut by more than half in the last 2 decades. (1989- [name]Jessica[/name]- 48,000, [name]Ashley[/name]- 48,000; 2009 [name]Isabella[/name]- 20,000, [name]Emma[/name]- 18,000) This means that not only do fewer children have a certain name, but there are more names used- some of them could be considered very unusual.