I think the biggest for us are:
*Gentle parenting. There is such a misconception out there about it. People think that it means letting your kids do whatever they want, that you are raising spoiled brats, etc. For us, it means treating our child like a human being, trying to find roots to a behavior rather than just reacting to it, trying to promote a close child/parent bond that functions as a safety net or foundation, guiding them (including discipline vs punishment), and so on.
*no sleep training. Sleep has been a big issue for us, in more ways than I can describe on here. LO is a very wakeful child. People have said to sleep train but that isn’t a road that felt comfortable for us. It crossed a line in our minds. We lay down with him for every nap and bedtime, in his own bed, until he falls asleep. The few people who know about this haaaaaate it because they consider it spoiling him.
*no spanking. I would say it is only recently being frowned upon in the US but older generations seem to think spanking is a huge part of parenting, sadly… We don’t do it.
*we try to say yes more than we say no. There are times in life when we have to do things we don’t want to, absolutely. However, if something isn’t going to hurt anyone or if there isn’t any actual good reason to do it, we try to do it. Not always but a good amount of the time.
*consent. We do not force LO to hug, kiss, be held by, talk to or be around anyone (doctor being the only real exception so far and even that includes a conversation about why/what/etc). No sitting on Santa’s lap. No you have to kiss grandma. This is 100% opposite of how DH and I were raised, so it has caused a few issues but hurt feelings are a-okay to me compared to my kid being hurt or raised to not care about his own/others’ autonomy.
*as far as education, I’m not sure what we’ll do with that yet. He’s 2.5 and we have several homeschooling friends who start when their kids are even younger than him!! I want him to just be a kid, not having to worry about academics so young. He does know letters, numbers until around 20, colors, a couple of shapes, etc but that’s because we let him watch like Blue’s Clues and stuff. Not going to lie. We aren’t directly teaching him yet. He will probably do mainstream schooling but their requirements are ridiculous!!! I know a little boy who failed kindergarten! Kindergarten! Ugh.
I’ll end this by saying parenting is very difficult and requires flexibility. It also oftentimes requires you to look at yourself, find healing for yourself, look at your own triggers, to grow alongside your kids… Each child and family dynamic is very different and what works for one may not work for the other. I personally think things like “gentle parenting” and teaching your kids to have some sort of agency should be the norm but there’s no one perfect method. I mess up daily. I apologize to my son and reflect on it. I try to do better the next time. It’s hard trying to carve out a life that isn’t just necessarily unconventional but just different from how you were raised. That isn’t everyone’s goal, I know, but it is one of mine. It is heartbreaking to realize how this kind of stuff can be generational. I grew up with yelling, threats and dysfunction being the norm. It is instinctive to react the same way. It is intentional not to.
So yeah, we don’t get a lot of support or respect for how we parent. That’s fine with us for the most part. It is about raising, loving and guiding the child that we were given, for the world they’ll be living in. We’re doing the best we can (and re-evaluating constantly!) for him.