Love it or hate it... my 2nd daughter has a unique name.

Birth Announcements
21

I just have to add that I don’t think the name [name]Butterfly[/name] would be a hinderance in any profession. While it is unusual, it is unusual in an eccentric way, and that is firstly not a bad thing at all, and secondly reflects only on the personalities of the parents.

It is not the same as naming your child, say, Zaeeydyn, as that is a low demographic name and that in itself implies that the child is likely to be less educated than other candidates.

I know many people with eccentric names, although none named [name]Butterfly[/name], and they all have respectable professions, with several lawyers, doctors, barristers and an accountant among them.

22

I think partially the circumstances “excuse” the name. I already wrote how I feel about it, but I don’t hold it against someone for reporting the name of their 6 year old. I would like to hear an account from someone with a 6 year old with an unusual name in public school somewhere in the US (for example), preferably somewhere that’s not a big city, like NY. It’s hard to know what you mean by “[name]Africa[/name].” Home school, I think most of us understand, kids are somewhat isolated from would-be playmates during the education process but may go to co-schooling where different parents teach a few kids on a subject they are more an expert on, and/or have some other activities among children the same age, like sports or girl scouts.

[name]Africa[/name] can mean a lot of things, and I don’t know if the OP is from [name]Africa[/name] or an expat, and what the living conditions and surrounding culture is like. There are some major cities in [name]Africa[/name], but I don’t know what that means, how are they similar and how are they different than cities in the US? What other kinds of names are popular in your locale? If the names used tend to be recognizably of some [name]African[/name] language, are they common words in that language as well as [name]Butterfly[/name] is in English?

Are you staying there, is this your home and [name]Butterfly[/name]'s home for good, or are you stationed for a period of time? Were you born there, does this go better with the local culture than it would in the US?

There are a lot of things I’m curious about! I still stand by my former statement, but I think a lot of mystique about choosing an unusual name may seem more fitting for your current surroundings - all you have stated is that she has an English word name, is homeschooled (somewhat isolated from her peers), and your parents disapprove of the name. People are taking it pretty hard, but we don’t probably know what it’s like there. I don’t know that anyone has enough information to feel comfortable with the choice as long as we have some idea this name does not seem fitting with our own cultural standards of a “real” name, who can be successful with this name or a more boring name would be better. “But in [name]Africa[/name], it might be just fine.” I want to know more about that, actually.

I want to know more about the area and what other people are doing - is [name]Butterfly[/name] as unusual where you are, relatively, as it is here in the US? And are you staying put, is [name]Butterfly[/name] going to have a pretty good chance of staying there for the rest of her life? Are your parents in [name]Africa[/name] as well?

I think I just don’t want to make assumptions - a lot of us are from the US, but by no means are we all, plenty from the UK and Australia, but quite a showing from all over the world. One tends to think how will this person’s name fare where I live, and it’s hard to figure out the situation if you are in fact living in [name]Africa[/name] because you’ve always lived in [name]Africa[/name] - you use an English-language word for the name of your daughter, and did not specify where in [name]Africa[/name]. South [name]Africa[/name]? And that your parents were embarrassed to say her name. I don’t know what any of that means. I don’t want to assume Africans (of unspecified nationality) would be more open-minded about a weird name, or that you are American (perhaps) and may not be there for the duration, in which case, [name]Butterfly[/name] might have a relatively more unusual name when she returns to the states. See, without more information, I am inventing scenarios. I still don’t see this name as a complete detriment - it’s quite eccentric, and I still think it’s great that you went with your gut instead of conceding to pressure to be, uh, tasteful, as it seems to be defined.

I don’t think the OP has added any thoughts since starting this thread, but I do recall this person posting before, had mentioned this name as her daughter’s name and that she lived in [name]Africa[/name]. Am I too nosy? What are the actual “ramifications,” if we can call them that, of choosing this name for your daughter, living in [name]Africa[/name] (what other people are doing), and if there is any reason any of us might think you are not living in [name]Africa[/name] forever, or truth to that presumption.

23

I [name]LOVE[/name] IT!!

24

I think [name]Butterfly[/name] is a sweet, lovely name! And the best thing about it is the girl who it belongs to loves it.

If I had a doctor named [name]Butterfly[/name], I would think, [name]How[/name] lovely and interesting! She must have had interesting parents. I wonder what the story behind her name is. I certainly wouldn’t think her unprofessional, as if her name had any bearing on her abilities.

Not everyone wants their child’s name to convey “sophistication” or that he or she comes from wealth. Success is defined differently by different people. Not everyone equates success with becoming a doctor or a laywer. What makes a profession “respectable” is also defined differently by different people. I don’t believe a profession is more “respectable” than others because it requires more years of formal education or because you can make a lot of money at it. An artist, craftsperson, or homemaker is just as deserving of respect as a doctor or lawyer!

I like many traditional names, like [name]Elizabeth[/name] or [name]Laura[/name], but I dislike the idea of choosing names based, partly anyway, on how “professional” they sound. I don’t associate success, or integrity, or happiness with wealth or being a “professional.”

By the way, how great that your daughter is home schooled : ) I was home schooled for a couple of years. I only wish I had started sooner.

25

@megt - I agree with you on the issue of what defines success, but I also think some people want to make sure that these avenues aren’t blocked off should their children wish to make a career in those certain fields. The competition is tight, and people can be judgmental about things. To pick a safe name is to at least allow their child will not be rejected by seeming less serious.

It’s not that everyone wants their children to be doctors and lawyers, it’s that they don’t want their children to be rejected by the schools and ultimately the clients on the basis of their name. They are not merely “sophisticated” professions - they can be rather rigid that way, and one would hope their child when he or she grows up may fit in anywhere they go, that people will not superficially question their serious capabilities where their life or freedom or property is at stake. If they are buying a dress or a chair or a picture for the wall, they are not basing the quality of the artistry on whether the name sounds too much like a lawyer to be taken seriously as they are the other way around.

There are more than a few ways to look at it. Some things we discuss here might be names we love but would never use. Names that seem cute for a child, but don’t age well. Names that would not sound like a stripper, for example. Certain names just don’t have the “best” imagery. Maybe you think stripping is a noble profession as any; I don’t have much of a problem with it myself. However, many people there may choose a stage name on the basis of imagery that’s more suitable to their profession than their given name, because names have imagery.

If you are instead, trying to name a future doctor, that doesn’t cause people to assume they are a doctor, does it? They can be a doctor if they want, or a stripper, or work on a road maintenance crew, or style hair, or keep bees, or teach economics in college, or be a professional photographer. Anything. That’s a quality that many parents choose to aim for. Some professions can be limiting and exclusive and judge people on minor things like their name (it does indicate upbringing and socio-economic status somewhat), and many people are nervous about limiting their child from anything they may wish to become, rather than intentionally naming their child to become something they equate with success with which you may not agree. That’s not what it is, I don’t think.

I may not be “successful” myself, so I would hypothetically mask my child so that their name doesn’t seem too flaky (too poorly brought up, or raised in vastly non-serious atmospheres - a whimsical name = whimsical parents, no?) to be in a serious and rigid career path, and at least theoretically keeps the opportunity to do so wider open, rather than as some challenge to overcome, to prove they are worthy and capable should someone judge that they are not up to it. If they have too whimsical a name, it seems they might have a harder time reaching some of the careers they could end up wanting, so they can be some things but not ANYTHING. Of course if I am a whimsical parent and name my child something seriously “professional,” the name becomes a generic, not a deciding factor. Who can trust the names anyway, if parents are designing their children’s futures with at least some strategy for fooling future employers? If that’s what you can call it. They pick a tame name, then the adult has a good chance of being raised conservatively enough to blend in where blending in is a virtue.

I happen to think even in some offices, it may be difficult to get that first interview for any position depending on what they do and what image they are trying to project. [name]How[/name] much more stellar a resume must be before they consider the significance of your name when you answer calls, hand out your business cards, or are introduced to potential clients in offices where image matters a great deal, in which a poor or incapable image loses business for them. Keep in mind that images and abilities are two separate things.

26

Gosh - this thread got a bit heated in parts!

I have to quote my friend who had a baby last week and was discussing family commenting on a given name, ‘In the end, once a baby has been given a name, if someone negatively comments on it, its more a reflection on them than anything…’ and i agree, so i am certainly not going to comment negatively.

I also question why you would canvas for opinion on your daughters naming 6 yrs after the fact??

I also add i think its entirely up to the parents what they name their child - they have to live with the consequences of doing so. If my parents couldn’t stand the name i gave to my child, it wouldn’t really bother me - they had their turn and the best they could come up with was [name]Emma[/name] (lovely name, but very boring imo) xx

27

I come from a family of artists - but I am afraid this name is just tooo “creative” for me. It seems like you are trying too hard to be different. [name]Hope[/name] I didn’t offend - with a name like [name]Butterfly[/name] I think you and your daughter will need thick skins!

28

I would be interesting in knowing what your oldest daughter’s name is. [name]Just[/name] because.

I’ll try to keep this short. If your daughter loves her name, that’s great. Whether she’ll continue to like into adulthood is another thing, but she could always use her mn later down the road. The nice thing is she has that option available to her.

I can honestly say that [name]Butterfly[/name] is NOT the worst name I’ve ever heard of. Not even close. When I worked at the hospital where I’m from, we had a little girl born whose was named (and I’m not kidding) [name]Lil[/name]’ Mama. We also had a BabyGurl, spelled just like that.

29

I love it! For me personally a name is just a word we all add meaning to, some people will always like it and some people will always not like it. You certainly cannot try and please everyone when naming your child. You pick something you love. I love it when people think outside the box and use something different. A child, when they have grown, can always change it if they want to.
Gosh my Mum certainly doesn’t like my taste in names, because I’ve been talking about names since I was little and she has just accepted that she will probably have to take some time to get used to what I call her grandchildren when I eventually have them!
So I think your daughters name is awesome: -)

30

It’s an interesting and good or bad, doesn’t matter. It’s been done. I think that while now, it is cute and all, how seriously is she going to be taken in the court room, the operating room, the board room, the class room… there are many jobs that are going to judge her by her name, before she even gets to meet them.

31

I only read page 1, but we cant be all [name]Marie[/name] or [name]John[/name]. She lives in [name]Africa[/name] where they dont speak English that much (or not as a first language I think) so [name]Butterfly[/name] isnt a problem, i think its like a more modern name there. Someone said ‘what if you meet a doctor named [name]Butterfly[/name]?’ who says shes even going to be a doctor?! maybe she wants to be a fashionlady or even own her own store?! Maybe shes just that person behind the regrister? And why dont take ‘butterfly’ serieus, she didnt choose to be butterfly and a name DOES NOT say anything about a person. Id think a [name]Walter[/name] is boring but he is the most awesome daredevil i know!

Of you like the name and it wouldt caus problems in daily life it shouldt be a problem. heck i know people named Human (mensje), [name]Butterfly[/name] (vlinder) and [name]Flower[/name] (Bloem) but not in english but in dutch where people speak dutch. would that be okay then? because english speaking people dont know it?

32

I’m not hear to judge anyone… just dropping in to share my thoughts on such an unusual name…

I for one, love hippie-dippy, tree hugging nature names! I really do! However, when deciding on names for my children, I picked classic, recognizable, and traditional (but not super popular, of course!) names for them, so that they could embrace anything they want to be as an adult without being laughed at or looked over. Who knows what they will decide to be when they are grown ups, but if my children do want to be lawyers, politicians, doctors, or actors, and the name I choice for them got in the way of their ambition, I’m sure they would resent me over it.

So although I really wanted to name my kids something along the lines of Dancing [name]Sunshine[/name] [name]Forrest[/name] or [name]Petunia[/name] [name]Ocean[/name] Moonlight, I held back, for the sake of my children and their egos.

If she loves her name when she is an adult, that’s great! But I wouldn’t be surprised by the time she is 20 her insisting on A. Changing her name, or B. Going by her middle name.

Good [name]Luck[/name]!

33

I personally think it’s terrible. She’ll love it when she’s a kid, but probably by high school age it won’t “fly” anymore.

34

I think it really depends on the way you look at the name. On one hand, it is very creative and charming! I think it would be very different if you had named your child Shark or Octopus, which are less pleasing creatures.

But, on the other hand, I think her name may become just a tad bit hard to carry throughout her life. I’m not saying you have to give her a common or traditional name like [name]Sarah[/name] or [name]Catherine[/name], but something that maybe had a few more options may have made it easier.

But overall I truly do love the fact that you have a daughter named [name]Butterfly[/name]!

Bounce :slight_smile:

35

Wow, that is a truly unique name! I definetely wouldn’t choose that name for my child, but then again, I prefer more traditional or Italian names. I must ask, where do you go from [name]Butterfly[/name]? You mentioned a first daughter…what is her name? If you plan on having more children, will their names be similar to [name]Butterfly[/name]? Maybe [name]Falcon[/name] or [name]Eagle[/name]? It would be rather odd to have a, for example, [name]Sarah[/name], [name]Butterfly[/name], and [name]Thomas[/name]. I can’t think of a name that would go well with [name]Butterfly[/name]…maybe [name]Skylar[/name]?

Also, does [name]Butterfly[/name] have any nicknames? Her name itself sounds more like a pet-name. For example, one of my neighbors calls his little daughter [name]Cricket[/name] and his son [name]Bear[/name] (as nicknames, their names are really [name]Rebecca[/name] and [name]Shawn[/name]. [name]Rebecca[/name] is called [name]Cricket[/name] because, as a newborn, her father said that her crying sounded like a cricket chirp. [name]Shawn[/name] is named [name]Bear[/name] because, A) he likes bears and B) he likes to growl (he is three)).

I can’t think of a good nickname for [name]Butterfly[/name]? Hopefully children (she will have to interact with children eventually) won’t call her Butt or Butter…