You’ve settled on a first name that is the unimpeachable, for sure, no doubt about it first name choice (in my case = Mayna). You like this name, and though there are other names out there you like more, the reasons for choosing this name trump other aesthetic preferences (in my case = the Chinese name has significant meaning for our multi-cultural/ethnic family). You want to choose a middle name that has family connections, and your first child also has a MN with family significance, however you are having the hardest time finding a girls middle name option with family significance that you really like very much.
[name]Do[/name] you
go ahead and choose a MN with family significance that you don’t completely love, though you don’t hate it either (in my case = Mayna [name]Rose[/name] [name]Luckie[/name]— if we go for the family significant route, I think we’ve settled on this one, we like it more than the other ones we’ve been considering (i.e. [name]Rosalie[/name], etc)— [name]Luckie[/name] is how you pronounce our last name),
choose a completely separate MN with no family significance, but one that you really love and think goes great together with the first name, and in fact makes you like the first name even more (in my case = Mayna [name]Danae[/name] (duh-NAY) [name]Luckie[/name]), OR
do a double MN with one family significant name and one with no significance (in my case = Mayna [name]Danae[/name] [name]Rose[/name] [name]Luckie[/name])?
I must be really tired because the first few times I saw the title of your post I thought Etiquette is a terrible middle name. What are people thinking?
Anyway, I can tell you that even though I’ve wanted to pick names with family significance when it comes down to actually naming our babies my husband and I have gone exclusively with personal significance. I have a middle name that was my grandmother’s and I don’t like it, I don’t think my mom liked it and I know that my grandmother in fact didn’t like her name. That being the case I wish my mom had picked a name she loved and I have done the same for my kids (or a name that my hubby loved).
I like the sound & familiarity of [name]Rose[/name] better with Mayna, but that’s just me. I also like the idea of the double middle. I did a double middle with my daughter & I’m glad I did
I’d say it depends how important it is for you to honor the [name]Rose[/name]. I wouldn’t do it just for the sake of continuity with your other daughter, or to follow your own naming rule. Are there other ways to honor [name]Rose[/name] - making her a Godmother?
Mayna [name]Danae[/name] is wonderful. [name]Do[/name] you know the [name]Gustav[/name] Klimt painting?
[name]Just[/name] remember this: as soon as you actually use a name it will forevermore be considered a family name. You have a rare opportunity to expand the family name pool I vote for using a name you really love. That being said, I think Mayna [name]Rose[/name] is really pretty and your daughter would be well served with either name. Good luck!
[name]Hi[/name]
We are planning to do double middles. Although I like a few different middles which do not have family significance, my partner believes that the name should have some kind of family meaning. So he wants one of the middles to be from family.
Could you choose the middle name you love and combine it with a form of the family name you like perhaps? E.g. [name]One[/name] of our family names is [name]Lily[/name] so I am considering [name]Lillian[/name], [name]Calla[/name], or even [name]Rosalia[/name].
Mayna [name]Danae[/name] is gorgeous by the way!
I’d use [name]Danae[/name], simply because of the wonderful paintings, the Klimt and also the Chantron, [name]Titian[/name] and most importantly, the beautiful Waterhouse.
If [name]Rose[/name] is very important, I’d do a two middle combo.
No has mentioned this yet - but if you are worried about siblings feeling left out because one had a family name and one doesn’t, or vice versa, I really think it is no big deal. My mother had four children. The first three had middle names after our mum and dad, but my youngest sister got [name]Louise[/name]- which is someone’s middle name on our family tree- but no biggie.
None of us have ever noticed or even cared. My other sister has two middle names and the rest of us have one- I think what you think sounds best is what you should go for
Option 3! That is exactly what we did! My son [name]Luther[/name]'s first middle name was one that we loved ([name]Wolf[/name]) and his second middle name honors my later father in law! Mind you, my hubby’s family has a tradition of using two middles to begin with anyway. It was perfect for us!
If not that, then I would choose option 1. Middle names with meaning trump names that we like.
First of all, I really don’t like [name]Danae[/name] with Mayna, cause it almost sounds kind of sing-songy…
However, I don’t understand putting in a family name…if its something you don’t like. I understand that its a way to honour someone or its a part of a tradition, but you should so something thats gonna make you happy.
My daughters middle name is my mums name. My sons middle name is my husbands grandfathers name. Neither name I truly love. But these two people are extremely important to us. My mum cried when she found out I named my daughter after her. And while my husbands grandfather has passed away it was very special to his family. In this case people trump names. I have accepted that if we have another girl, her middle name will be my [name]MIL[/name]. Again a name that I wouldn’t normally choose, but the sentiment is very important to my husband and that’s more important. If you are doing it because it has special meaning to YOU then do it, but if you’re just doing it because you feel like you have to or have outside family pressure then don’t do it cause you’ll probably regret it!
My parents gave me a middle name that they thought was pretty, but had no special significance outside of them really liking it and it sounding good with my first and last name. When my brother and sister came along, however, they gave them names that meant a lot to them (in our case, naming them after friends who felt like family). 30 years later when we talk about our middle names, there is still great enthusiasm for my siblings’ ( which are fairly normal names-- [name]Thomas[/name] and [name]Michele[/name]), but everyone is kind of “eh” about mine.
I am exactly the opposite: When thinking of names, I am all gung-ho about choosing a name that we love and looking at all these great names out there, but then when it comes to actually naming the baby, the only names that feel right are family names that mean something to us.
That just goes to show you that everyone’s different and there is no right way or wrong way – just the way that feels right to you. If you’re thinking about a double middle (something I’m not a fan of, especially if it’s just because you want to include a name you like the sound of), I would wonder if your first daughter would feel left out that she also didn’t get a double middle – with one name you loved and one name that was a family name. It may feel like you thought less about her name. Personally, my middle name was just a name that my parents liked the sound of with my first name and it always felt worthless and meaningless to me because it had no family significance or meaning, whereas my brothers all had family names.
And also, I just think Mayna [name]Rose[/name] sounds a whole lot better than Mayna [name]Danae[/name] or Mayne [name]Danae[/name] [name]Rose[/name]. Good luck!
Thanks for the in-depth responses everyone! They are all very useful in our ongoing reflection process. We still haven’t settled on any one option, for sure, but getting some further perspective from you all is very helpful.
I vote for using a name you really love. That being said, I think Mayna [name]Rose[/name] is really pretty and your daughter would be well served with either name. Good luck!