We are adopting a little girl from Poland who is 8 years old. She has no middle name and the agency has advised that we pick one for her US documents. Her first name is [name_f]Kamila[/name_f], and they call her [name_f]Mila[/name_f] so we need something that will work with the long and short versions of her name. Of course, she will have some input on this as well.
But we are also open to other suggestions. We want something more traditional. [name_f]Anne[/name_f] is out, as is [name_f]Margaret[/name_f]-- they have bad associations for us.
[name_f]Kamila[/name_f] [name_f]Katherine[/name_f] or [name_f]Kamila[/name_f] [name_f]Verity[/name_f] or [name_f]Kamila[/name_f] [name_f]Beatrice[/name_f] or [name_f]Kamila[/name_f] [name_f]Elizabeth[/name_f].
We like [name_f]Kamila[/name_f] [name_f]Rose[/name_f] but have about 18 friends who have little girls who are some version of [name_f]Rose[/name_f]. [name_f]Madeline[/name_f] is lovely.
[name_f]Mila[/name_f] [name_f]Mae[/name_f] is adorable-- spunky and cute!
We are shying away from truly Polish names as her last name will be a four syllable, three word Spanish name (De La ___) and they just tend to sound really awkward.
She likes [name_f]Sofia[/name_f] because she is a big fan of [name_f]Princess[/name_f] [name_f]Sophia[/name_f] from Disney. But we have a bit of a language barrier and its difficult to explain the nuances of naming. The idea of a middle name in Poland is typically a saint’s name so we are trying to hew close to the more traditional.
Why don’t you let her choose? Maybe [name_f]Mila[/name_f] remembers her mother, grandmother, or an aunt that she admires? A best friend that she’s leaving behind? Many of the names that are familiar to us that people are suggesting may sound like hard to pronounce foreign last names to her. [name_f]Magda[/name_f] and [name_f]Magdalena[/name_f], [name_f]Kasia[/name_f] and Katryzna are the equivalents of some of the classic names that have been suggested. Maybe it would be helpful to [name_f]Mila[/name_f] if you found the names you like best and their Polish equivalents
We have been strongly advised to choose a more American middle name to help her integrate culturally and linguistically by social workers in both Poland and the US. In fact, we have been asked to “Americanize” [name_f]Kamila[/name_f] by changing it to [name_f]Camilla[/name_f] or [name_f]Camille[/name_f], but are not doing so. [name_f]Mila[/name_f] has not indicated any special names except that she likes [name_f]Sofia[/name_f] from the Disney princess. We want something that is easy for her to say and spell and that will flow with her new last name.
The OP already said that Polish variants in general don’t work with her last name. I would actually take the advice to change her name completely. I had firends adopt from Bulgarian and Ukraine. IN one case the changed the name totally and the kid loved it and got used to it as a part of his new family. IN the other the kid kept his name and it was the cause of merciless teasing in school and highlighted his “otherness” and made him shy.
I would never let an 8 year old pick their own name-- If I had, I would have been called [name_f]Natasha[/name_f] [name_f]Rapunzel[/name_f]!
Oh and if you want my vote I like [name_f]Kamila[/name_f] [name_f]Jane[/name_f], [name_f]Kamila[/name_f] [name_f]Sofia[/name_f] (with the F spelling) and [name_f]Kamila[/name_f] [name_f]Maxine[/name_f]. You could call her [name_f]Mila[/name_f] [name_u]Max[/name_u]! Cute.
I cannot fathom living eight years of your life known by your name and instantly being told one day that is no longer who you are. The child will already be facing an enormous amount of changes, yes many wonderful and exciting but I strongly feel @vintagegrl is correct to allow her the stability of keeping her first name! Her new daughter’s nn [name_f]Mila[/name_f] is very common and popular in [name_u]North[/name_u] [name_u]America[/name_u] which would not inhibit her settling in. Congratulations @vintagegrl!
Thanks! There are strong opinions on both sides of the adoption name change argument. We like [name_f]Kamila[/name_f]'s name and see no reason to change it but are pleased and excited that we get to add to it as she doesn’t have a middle name. I do agree that the input of a young child on her name might differ quite a bit from the adult. I was obsessed with Ballerina [name_f]Barbie[/name_f] at athat age and would have happily named myself after her, which I am sure I would regret now. So we are taking the lead on the middle name with her approval but feel as though it will be too much to expect her to choose something entirely on her own.
Is there a family name, maybe even your first or middle name that you like and would flow well with [name_f]Kamila[/name_f]? It might make her feel very special as she grows that she is named in part after her mommy.
My name is [name_f]Laura[/name_f] and my nickname was [name_f]Lala[/name_f] as a child which is Slavic/Hungarian for tulip. My grandma was 100% Polish and grandpa was Czech and Polish so we have some Americanized versions of Polish names in the family which are saints names like [name_f]Mary[/name_f]/[name_f]Maria[/name_f], [name_f]Catherine[/name_f], [name_f]Rose[/name_f], [name_f]Emily[/name_f], [name_f]Margaret[/name_f], etc. None of these thrill me thought I do like [name_f]Katherine[/name_f] with a “K”. My husband’s last name is Spanish and he is English/Belgian and Mexican.
Personally, I’d go with something short-- 1 or 2 syllables-- since [name_f]Kamila[/name_f] and your last name are both longer. From your list, I think [name_f]Kamila[/name_f] [name_f]Grace[/name_f] is my favorite. Other ideas: [name_f]Kamila[/name_f] [name_f]Marie[/name_f], [name_f]Kamila[/name_f] [name_f]Elise[/name_f], [name_f]Kamila[/name_f] [name_f]Nicole[/name_f], [name_f]Kamila[/name_f] [name_f]Ruth[/name_f], [name_f]Kamila[/name_f] [name_f]Rose[/name_f]. Personal preference as far as ‘flow’ of the name goes, I think if you do a two syllable middle name, something with an emphasis on the second syllable rather than the first might be preferable ([name_f]Kamila[/name_f] [name_f]Marie[/name_f] or [name_f]Kamila[/name_f] [name_f]Maxine[/name_f] flow better than [name_f]Kamila[/name_f] [name_f]Mary[/name_f]) But that’s probably just me being crazy.
Congratulations on the adoption! My favorites are [name_f]Maxine[/name_f] and [name_f]Mae[/name_f] because I’m a big fan of alliteration. I also like [name_f]Sofia[/name_f], [name_f]Grace[/name_f], [name_f]Katherine[/name_f], and [name_f]Jane[/name_f].
Some others that came to mind:
[name_f]Joy[/name_f]
[name_f]Irene[/name_f]
[name_u]June[/name_u]
[name_f]Claire[/name_f]
[name_f]Magdalene[/name_f]
[name_f]Louise[/name_f]/[name_u]Eloise[/name_u]
[name_f]Therese[/name_f]