[name_f]My[/name_f] son’s dad and I share a 2 year old son who’s first name is [name_m]William[/name_m] and middle name is [name_m]Alexander[/name_m]. Dad and the paternal grandparents call our son “Alex”, but I call him Will/William and so does my family. [name_f]My[/name_f] ex had wanted [name_m]Alexander[/name_m] to be the first name, but eventually settled as it being the middle name (I had no idea that they would call our son [name_u]Alex[/name_u] at this time). I made it very clear that I absolutely hate the nickname [name_u]Alex[/name_u]. I like the full form of [name_m]Alexander[/name_m] and even [name_m]Xander[/name_m], but hate [name_u]Alex[/name_u]. I told him this multiple times from the time I was 4 months pregnant. He assured me that our son would never be called [name_u]Alex[/name_u], but then we broke up shortly after he was born and all of a sudden that’s what they call our son. He knows his name is [name_m]William[/name_m] and will turn his head when I call out his name and if I ask where’s [name_m]William[/name_m]? He will point at his chest and say “me”. I’ve seen them call “Alex” and he literally doesn’t even turn his head until they say it three or four times.
I know that being called two different names is going to get confusing, especially when he starts school. They have tried to set appointments under the name “Alex” (ones both me and my son’s dad were going to). They introduce him to everyone as “Alex”. We live 1 hour apart and the chance of running into each other is small, but still. It is such a weird feeling when I get a text from my ex or his family and they say “How is Alex?” And I say “Will is doing great”. I have no doubt that they will try to get “Alex” to be our son’s name when he starts school. I am getting really depressed about this and people have said that “it isn’t a big deal and it’s just a nickname get over it”. Well, I can’t help it. It bothers me. I keep thinking “which name will our son choose when he is older?”. I can’t imagine calling him [name_u]Alex[/name_u]. I’m not trying to be overdramatic or anything. Our son’s last name is hyphenated and they try to cut my name out. They have been trying to teach our son that his name is “Alex (dad’s last name)”. They write it out repeatedly and say it a lot. I do the same thing with Will/William, but I always include the full hyphenated last name as it is only fair. Please tell me I’m not crazy for feeling depressed about my son being called a different name and not having any control over it. Especially a name that I hate. I wish i had not agreed to the middle name, but it was something my ex pushed and I thought that if they did call him by it, it would be [name_m]Xander[/name_m]. It’s going to be confusing if my son goes by [name_m]Will[/name_m] at school and his dad picks him up and tells “Hey Alex!” And then his friends go “Who’s that?”. I just needed to vent in a safe space that is anonymous. So thanks for getting this far.