Mourning the Loss of Names You Can't Use

A thread to share the names you adore but can’t use, whether it’s due to popularity, pronunciation, or association.

For me—

[name_f]Lydia[/name_f] (I have a close relative)
Driftwood (too wordy)
[name_u]Honor[/name_u]/Valor (too wordy)
[name_f]Styx[/name_f] (too weird)
[name_m]Adolf[/name_m] (I genuinely love this name, but the association is too strong!)
[name_u]Jerusalem[/name_u] (just too much)
Ealton (too close to [name_m]Elton[/name_m] [name_m]John[/name_m]— not that that’s necessarily a bad association, but it’s too much)
[name_u]Mercury[/name_u] (so many associations. I could never get past them. [name_u]Freddie[/name_u] [name_u]Mercury[/name_u], the substance, the planet, the god…)
[name_f]Saoirse[/name_f] (cultural appropriation-ish)
[name_u]Raiden[/name_u] (same as [name_f]Saoirse[/name_f])
[name_m]Eliseo[/name_m] (same as [name_f]Saoirse[/name_f])
[name_u]Bodhi[/name_u] (same as [name_f]Saoirse[/name_f])


I think
[name_u]Jerusalem[/name_u] (in the middle)
and [name_u]Raiden[/name_u] are pretty usable.
[name_u]Mercury[/name_u] seems pretty usable as well.
[name_f]Styx[/name_f] is quite interesting.
I knew a boy named [name_m]Anakin[/name_m]. He was [name_f]Indian[/name_f], so I guess it was a cultural name for him.

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Scotia — I love it, but it’s too tied with [name_u]Nova[/name_u] [name_f]Scotia[/name_f]

Cordelia — I dislike how popular it’s been getting, but it’s popular for a reason

Venilia — I genuinely love Venilia, but she’s a [name_m]Roman[/name_m] deity and I feel like it’s kind of appropriation to use.

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I’m dead set on [name_m]Vance[/name_m] and [name_f]Ophelia[/name_f] as firsts for my kids, so that eliminates:

Perfectly good names I’ve associated with people I know:

Names I kind of like but have given to characters and I don’t feel like changing their names:

Cultural appropriation:
[name_f]Mariposa[/name_f] (I’m also lepidopterophobic)
[name_f]Fairuza[/name_f] possibly
the -lani group

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I’m mourning [name_u]Rex[/name_u], [name_u]Milo[/name_u], [name_m]Caspar[/name_m], [name_u]August[/name_u], [name_m]Bastian[/name_m], [name_m]Miro[/name_m] and [name_u]Jude[/name_u], which I’m pretty sure my partner won’t say yes to for our baby.


I’m definitely mourning [name_f]Rose[/name_f] :rose:

I honestly love the name [name_f]Rose[/name_f] it’s a beautiful romantic choice so elegant but I cannot use it due to my daughter’s father vetoing the name. Also I think with [name_f]Rose[/name_f] even if I was to have another daughter way way way into the future I wouldn’t use [name_f]Rose[/name_f] because of one of my closest friends having a [name_u]Peyton[/name_u]-[name_f]Rose[/name_f] I just think having a [name_u]Peyton[/name_u]-[name_f]Rose[/name_f] & a [name_f]Rose[/name_f] running around is too much especially as they will most likely be spending a lot of time together. I love [name_f]Rose[/name_f] to pieces but I just can’t see myself naming a daughter [name_f]Rose[/name_f] despite for years visualising having a daughter called [name_f]Rose[/name_f].


My whole list

Especially mourning [name_f]Josepha[/name_f]


Daphne, [name_f]Daisy[/name_f] and [name_f]Dahlia[/name_f] (all too cartoon character-ish with my partner’s last name)
[name_f]Elodie[/name_f] (friend used it)
[name_u]Jarrah[/name_u] (friend used it)
[name_u]Arlo[/name_u] (too popular and two friends used it)
[name_u]Darragh[/name_u] (as above with the girl’s D names)
[name_f]Flora[/name_f] (best friend’s favourite name, though if she gives me permission I will use it)
[name_f]Isla[/name_f], [name_f]Grace[/name_f], [name_f]Hazel[/name_f] (all in the top 10 where I live, though may still consider them)

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R.I.P. [name_m]Theodore[/name_m] :sob:

Found out the person I was going to honor with it doesn’t actually like his name. I love it, but I have decided, with the help of the Berries, that it wouldn’t be best to honor someone with a name they don’t even really like.


Already used in the family:

S/O vetoed:
[name_f]Princess[/name_f] (still using as a middle tho because it’s a very personal thing for me)
[name_u]Halo[/name_u] :broken_heart:

A lot of vetoed ones I’m trying again anyways because he usually changes his mind :joy:


I’m not brave enough for:

Then I obviously can’t use [name_m]Cohen[/name_m], which I think has a really nice sound.

Then due to association:
[name_f]Amy[/name_f] :sob:




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Jane, [name_u]Anne[/name_u], [name_f]Eulalia[/name_f], [name_f]Signy[/name_f], [name_u]Dale[/name_u], [name_u]Louise[/name_u], [name_m]Heath[/name_m], [name_u]Wade[/name_u]

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I have a cousin [name_u]Honor[/name_u] who almost had a sibling [name_u]Valor[/name_u]! :grin:

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I feel like most of my favorite names either sound terrible in my accent or I’d be too afraid to use :upside_down_face:

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Same! I love [name_u]Nova[/name_u] and [name_f]Scotia[/name_f], but I live there. Maybe if I live somewhere else in the future, I could use either to honour my roots :woman_shrugging:

Other names I love but can’t use:
[name_u]Michael[/name_u] - A family member’s name that I don’t want people to think I’m honouring
[name_m]Duncan[/name_m] - Same as [name_u]Michael[/name_u]
[name_f]Pearl[/name_f] / [name_f]Perla[/name_f] - Same as [name_u]Michael[/name_u]
[name_f]Arwen[/name_f] - [name_f]My[/name_f] cousin used it


There are a few names I can’t use because of associations/history, but it’s not an issue because I don’t like the names anyway.

The only name that really comes to mind for me is [name_u]James[/name_u] - I love it so much and I so, so wish I could use it, but it is the middle name of someone my partner really dislikes and the association is really strong for them. :sob: :sob: :sob: :sob:

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Violet because it sounds a little similar to my son’s name [name_u]Elliott[/name_u].:frowning: possibly [name_m]Bellamie[/name_m] too

Hayes, [name_u]Hayden[/name_u], any name starting with “Hay” because our last name is similar to [name_f]Hazel[/name_f].

Evangeline, any [name_f]Eve[/name_f] name and [name_f]Vivienne[/name_f]- I know too many

Olivia and [name_u]Wyatt[/name_u]-too popular

Jared, [name_u]Corbin[/name_u], [name_u]Oliver[/name_u], [name_m]Clayton[/name_m], [name_m]Isaac[/name_m], [name_m]Isaiah[/name_m] - friends have used

Isabel, [name_f]Blythe[/name_f], [name_f]Aimee[/name_f] - friends of mine

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There are ways to reinvent the name and bring new life back to it. [name_u]Theo[/name_u] or [name_u]Teddy[/name_u] brings a youthful feel to an otherwise older, more classic name.

I also plan to honor my grandfather whose first name was [name_u]Oliver[/name_u], even though he hated it and always went by his middle name, which was [name_m]Guy[/name_m]. Sadly he passed away a couple months ago so he won’t be here to meet my future son, but I hope he would have been proud to share his name, even if it wasn’t his favorite.

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