I had my baby shower last weekend and we waited until then to announce the name we had chosen, [name_m]Gable[/name_m] [name_f]Juliette[/name_f]. Everyone seemed to like the name, not that they would say it to my face if they didn’t and not that I would care, but my [name_f]MIL[/name_f] made her disdain for it known by stating boldly in front of everyone that she would NOT be calling our daughter by that name. I was embarrassed and extremely hurt. I started crying and had to leave the room. Who does that? I mean she could have told me in private how she felt she didn’t need to make a huge ordeal out of it. It’s my child and I am to the point where if that is how she feels then she doesn’t need to see my daughter at all. It took my husband at least 2 hours to get me to calm down so I could get back to my party by then she had left than God. It’s just so frustrating I am due in 2 weeks I don’t need this drama!
You’re right- you’re due in 2 weeks and you don’t need this drama. You also have raging hormones.
Clearly your [name_f]MIL[/name_f] is not very savvy. The name you chose is lovely, and while us berries are easier to take to a name that’s not on the beaten track, most people need a little time to get used to it. Your [name_f]MIL[/name_f] should have kept her ideas to herself (like I’m sure at least a few others did) and wait until your little bundle is born to decide what she will or wont call her.
Chalk it up to a lack of social grace, not negativity, from your [name_f]MIL[/name_f]. She obviously has a hard time keeping thoughts in her head… I wish her a speedy recovery! She’ll come around once she meets her newest granddaughter. Eat some chocolate and do some reading. This will be fine.
Good luck!
Yeah… Hmm… I understand why she reacted the way she did (re [name_m]Gable[/name_m], not [name_f]Juliette[/name_f]) but I agree that she should have done so in private and not in front of everyone at the party.
While [name_m]Gable[/name_m] isn’t my style, I certainly feel your anger and frustration at your [name_f]MIL[/name_f]'s behaviour. Her ignorance and rudeness was not appropriate. I hope she’ll apologize to you for her lack of good manners. You do not need any drama at this time. Unfortunately, I’ve read many stories like yours regarding negative family reactions to chosen names. That’s why I always advise parents to keep the name choice a secret until after the birth certificate is signed. It’s your child so if you like [name_m]Gable[/name_m] then go for it!
That’s terrible she did that at your baby shower! I had a friend say some horrible things to me the night before my shower, and thank God for make-up and eye cream because I was crying until the wee hours of the morning. I’m trying not to add that to my mountain of anecdotal evidence that points to people getting more and more self-centered and less and less tactful. It doesn’t sound like it swayed your name choice at all, so I would just try and shrug it off the best you can, even though she was in the wrong.
Mothers-in-law are no fun sometimes, and something is clearly wrong with yours. [name_f]My[/name_f] sympathies are with you.
Honestly, with future children it might be best to wait until the baby is here (and birth certificate signed, as a previous poster said) to announce his/her name. Especially if you like non-traditional first names.
Everyone on both sides of our family and even acquaintances and strangers didn’t like my daughter’s name before she was here. They told us all about it all the time and would make suggestions of other names. We didn’t back down, and they all accepted it. Now they can’t imagine her with any other name. [name_m]Set[/name_m] the precedent now and there will be less hassling in the future when you have more kids. No one said a word about our choices this time around. And once she is here, [name_f]MIL[/name_f] will be dying to see her. Let her know that her name is [name_m]Gable[/name_m] and the expectation is that she will honor your wishes and call her that. Correct her every time she tries to say something different. She’ll come around. And if not, a little time away from baby will make her. Good luck!
We got a load of negative reactions about both our daughters’ names (although most people were more tactful about it). Other people just don’t realize how important of a decision it is to you & how sensitive new parents can be about their choices. I’m sure she’ll apologize to you & once your baby is here she will start to love the name (that’s what happened for us). Try not to dwell on it, just let it go and move on - you will feel better soon.
Edit: I want to add you should definitely NOT threaten to keep her from seeing your daughter over something as trivial as a disagreement over a name. You can talk to her about how you feel, tell her that even if she doesn’t like it you would like her to call your daughter by her name, even get into a huge argument with her if you want to.
But threatening to keep her out of your daughter’s life isn’t fair to her, to your husband, or to your daughter.
I’m sure if you really think about it you will agree.
I love the name [name_m]Gable[/name_m] and I have it on my list for a future son. I’m sorry your [name_f]MIL[/name_f] acted that way, especially at the baby shower which is very inappropriate. I’m sure when she sees the baby her mind will change, or she can call her by a nickname. I don’t see why family gets so upset over a name if it’s what the parents want.
I agree she shouldn’t have reacted that way, but I probably would have made a separate announcement to family, especially since [name_m]Gable[/name_m] is an unusual name (meaning I’d expect my family to dislike it).
I think some grandparents definitely feel a sense of ownership/entitlement over their grandchildren and sometimes can be upset or sensitive when the parents choose something they don’t like. Its like a surprise that their feelings and preferences weren’t considered when the baby’s name was chosen, because its “their grandchild”. Unfortunately for such people, being a biological grandparent does not give them any naming rights at all, just as it doesn’t afford them the right to decide what your baby should be fed or how your toddler should be disciplined etc. [name_m]Gable[/name_m] is YOUR baby and her name should be chosen by you and your partner alone. If grandma doesn’t like it, she should zip her lips and be happy for you both for finding the perfect name that you love.
I love the name [name_m]Gable[/name_m], I think it is a great choice, unusual but in a good way 
If I were in your position, I would simply inform her that [name_m]Gable[/name_m] is the name you chose, and if she would like to spend time with her grandchild, she will refer to her as such. That’s just me, I know others would be more compromising on this but I personally could not tolerate anyone (even the grandmother) refusing to call the child by her name. She will most likely realize how silly it is for her to miss out on being part of your daughter’s life, and accept the fact that she doesn’t have to like it, but she does have to respect your wishes. Hopefully she will come around!
I’d like to point out that cases like this don’t only come up when parents use non-traditional/unusual names. [name_f]My[/name_f] grandmother hates “old people” names. When her great-niece was born, she was named [name_f]Josephine[/name_f], which my grandmother thought was an absolute travesty. She complained loudly about it and pointedly calls her a cutesy nickname that she considers to be more youthful and appropriate. On the other hand, my grandmother’s great-grandchild has a very unusual, misspelled surname for a first name (not a family name) that would get absolutely trashed here on Nameberry, but she loves that choice.
[name_f]My[/name_f] point is that the issue is with the person doing the complaining, not the name. We all have different taste, and we should all be capable of being tactful and considerate about our differing preferences.
Sorry that you mother-in-law was so inappropriate. She had her chance to name her own children. I wonder how she would have felt if someone told her when she was a new mother that they disliked her choice for a name so strongly that they intended to basically ignore it and just call the kid whatever they pleased? It’s incredibly tactless, inconsiderate, and disrespectful.
[name_m]Don[/name_m]'t let it get you down. Once she can attach a real live baby to the name she’ll cool it. [name_f]My[/name_f] future mil is also very opinionated and for that reason no one in the family tells her names until she can hold the little one in her arms ;).
I’m new here, I hope I’m posting this right.
I’m so sorry you had to go through that at your baby shower! [name_m]How[/name_m] awful. 
For what it’s worth, I think [name_m]Gable[/name_m] [name_f]Juliette[/name_f] is absolutely beautiful, angelic even. It’s unfortunate your [name_f]MIL[/name_f] wasn’t at all tactful in the situation. But you know, it’s behind you. [name_m]Just[/name_m] breathe it out and away. You are carrying a precious soul inside of you and these moments are so beautiful. Anything people say or do doesn’t have to affect you if you don’t allow it to. [name_m]Just[/name_m] breathe it out and away. [name_m]Gable[/name_m] [name_f]Juliette[/name_f] is beautiful.
[name_m]Gable[/name_m] is cute for either gender. I am sure when [name_m]Gable[/name_m] is here she will warm up to her name.
[name_f]My[/name_f] grandmother actually called me [name_f]Isabel[/name_f] until I was in my 20s (not even close to my name)! She always said she didn’t dislike my name, she just liked [name_f]Isabel[/name_f]. I loved it because I worshiped my grandmother and actually responded to both names!
That being said, I would never let someone call my child by a different name after being so rude (not sure I would let them do it even if they weren’t rude - depends on the reason I guess). I’m sorry that happened to you. Totally insensitive/ignorant/selfish. I know some people are more sympathetic to her, but I wouldn’t tolerate it. I would let her know that if she wants to spend time with [name_m]Gable[/name_m], she has to call her by her name. If you back down on this, it sets the precedent that she can throw a fit and then get her way when it comes to raising [name_m]Gable[/name_m] (kind of like toddlers throwing tantrums
Best of luck and congratulations!!!
PS Beautiful name.
Disgusting woman! What is wrong with her?!
The way she acted is completely uncalled for. There are more tactful ways to say she doesn’t like a name and to say so in private but her opinion wasn’t asked for so it shouldn’t have been given.
[name_f]My[/name_f] mother is the same way. She called my cousin [name_m]Tobias[/name_m], Toboggan all the time and frequently states that another cousin gave one son a good name ([name_u]Tristan[/name_u]) and her second son a bad name ([name_u]Riley[/name_u]).
For any other children I would try not to share the name until the birth certificate is filled out and signed. Unfortunately some people are just rude.
Shame on her for doing that at your baby shower! You seem really nice and you didn’t deserve that at all!
[name_m]Gable[/name_m] [name_f]Juliette[/name_f] is an adorable name for a little girl, and if she doesn’t like it, too bad: [name_m]Gable[/name_m] is your baby girl. Your [name_f]MIL[/name_f] already got to name her kids and while she may not like your daughter’s name, she had her turn and she needs to be respectful of you and your husband’s choices.
Congrats from the USA!