I am seeking advice on a name change for my 4 month old son. His dad was pretty insistent on having a junior so we named him [name_u]Kyle[/name_u] [name_u]Michael[/name_u] [name_m]Jr[/name_m]. which I liked with at the time. Fast forward 4 months and his dad has left us and moved 1000+ miles away…
He doesn’t respond to his name yet but all of his stuff says [name_u]Kyle[/name_u] all over it. He is signed up at daycare as [name_u]Kyle[/name_u]. His birth announcements said [name_u]Kyle[/name_u]. I feel a little weird changing it but I do not want him to share a name with his dad.
I love the name [name_m]Jaxson[/name_m] or [name_m]Nixson[/name_m] and would love to use one of those for him, but I am afraid the transition will be really weird and confusing? Any advice would be great!!
He’s still young, so a name change wouldn’t be confusing for him. I’m sure family/friends would be very understanding if you chose to change his name, so that’s a plus for you.
I think that one solution could be to keep his first name legally as [name_u]Kyle[/name_u], but give him the middle name [name_m]Jaxson[/name_m] or [name_m]Nixson[/name_m]. That way, he can continue to be under the name [name_u]Kyle[/name_u], matching the birth announcements (kinda) and his daycare registration (have you brought up to them that there might be a possible name change? It may not be a huge deal in their system). You could call him by his middle. Many people do it and I think that could really work here. It’d change his [name_m]Junior[/name_m] status, as well, which is another plus.
The issue that you may run into is that you may need the father’s consent. I’m not 100% on how that works in general and in your area, but it may be a possibility. Where I’m at, you can do it without other parental consent, in cases of abandonment, but it is extra paperwork. For what it’s worth, I think it is up to you. I don’t think there is a right or wrong, as long as it is in the child’s best interest. Best of luck.
I’m sorry you are in such a difficult situation and having to deal with this! If it’s any consolation I work at a daycare/nursery and have dealt with a couple of name changes, usually after parents break up. Normally it’s no big deal to us, just a change on a computer system. [name_m]Jaxson[/name_m]/[name_m]Nixson[/name_m] are fine, and I agree with above poster that using one as a middle name would save you the hassle of switching his first name. Or maybe something with [name_u]Kyle[/name_u] still in it eg [name_m]Kyler[/name_m] [name_m]Jaxson[/name_m]/[name_u]Skyler[/name_u] [name_m]Nixson[/name_m]? Good luck!
Clearly I don’t know much about your situation so this might be a misguided thought, please feel very free to ignore it.
Is there any chance his father may realise his mistake and come back into your son’s life semi-soon? Changing your son’s name would mean quite a break between him and his father - which is super warranted if he does stay away. But if he were to return and ends up having an active role in your son’s life, I can imagine the changed name might cause your son more trouble in the long run, as it does highlight the fact that he is supposed to be “separated” from his father.
I’m not sure if I’m using the right words, but I hope you catch my drift?
Would it be an option to change your son’s name first in everyday use and make the legal change at some later point? It might even make the name changing process easier, even if his father would try to stop it, as I’m sure it’s in the child’s best interest to have his legal name be his actual name in stead of something he wouldn’t recognise at all.
As for his birth announcement, I wouldn’t worry about it. I’m sure your family and friends will be very supportive of you changing his name. I don’t think it will be a problem at all. Businesses also will all deal with it somehow. You can phase out the stuff saying [name_u]Kyle[/name_u] - I imagine a lot of things can easily be replaced or will fall out of use as soon as he is a little older?
No his dad will not be welcomed back into our lives even if he does move back. It is too personal to share here so I will just leave it at that. My son sharing a name with him at all is unacceptable and I don’t want him to have any unnecessary connection to him. I like the idea of [name_u]Skyler[/name_u] but it is still a reminder that it used to be [name_u]Kyle[/name_u]. If you don’t think it will be an issue then I guess those at daycare and other people probably won’t mind either. My dad has called him X since before he was born because he is the 10th grandchild so that’s why I like names with X in them like [name_m]Jaxson[/name_m] and [name_m]Nixson[/name_m].
Change it! He’s so young! I wouldn’t keep [name_u]Kyle[/name_u] as a first name at all, just change it all if you’re going to change it! Not only would it be an annoying reminder for you to call him [name_u]Kyle[/name_u] every day, but as he grows up it could be painful for him to have that name.
Change it! If it’s unacceptable to you that he shares his Dads name I would definitely change it. He’s so young that I don’t think it will be an issue at all and I think people would be very understanding of it. Out of [name_m]Nixson[/name_m] and [name_m]Jaxson[/name_m], I prefer [name_m]Jaxson[/name_m].
I’m sorry that your and your little boy are having to go through this. He is definitely young enough to change it without it confusing him (which I think is the most important thing) in terms of legally changing a name, people do it everyday, businesses, Drs etc will be used to it. My favourite of your suggestions is [name_m]Jaxon[/name_m], and I think the suggestion of [name_m]Dax[/name_m] is cool, how about [name_m]Xavier[/name_m] nn X? I love that his grandpa has a special nn for him, so cute!
This happened to a friend of mine 25 years ago. She’d always loved [name_u]Michael[/name_u] but gave in to her husband’s wish for a different (kind of weird) name. When they broke up 6 months later she [name_m]RAN[/name_m] to a lawyer, changed the baby’s name to [name_u]Michael[/name_u] and never looked back. Everyone understood and supported her decision.
I’d take the word of elle-bea who has worked in day care that the switch will be a minor thing at the age of your son. I also think choosing a name that incorporates the “X” that connects to your own father could help in the healing process as you get through this situation.
I like [name_m]Nixon[/name_m] and [name_m]Jaxon[/name_m], but don’t know why you would include the ‘S’ in [name_m]JaxSon[/name_m] and [name_m]NixSon[/name_m] - the X makes that ‘S’ sound for you.
I would change it, changing his whole name shouldn’t be any harder than just changing his middle. I know someone who changed their last name (to his stepdad’s name as an adult) and he was told it didn’t matter how many he changed, it was the same. (he decided to change his middle name while he was at it.) depending on where you live it might not be that hard anyway. I would try using [name_m]Nixon[/name_m] or [name_m]Jaxon[/name_m] and then try the other to decide if they will work or which you like better.
oh gosh I would change it for sure! your son is young and he wont know any different. I have a friend who recently changed her baby’s name, no big deal! people change their minds!
I agree 100% with your decision to change it! If you don’t mind me saying so, I’m amazed by the narcissism of this guy insisting on naming your son his exact name as a junior, and then leaving him months later. Sounds like you dodged a bullet with that jerk, and I wish you all the best with your new life without him.
I like [name_m]Jaxson[/name_m] much better than [name_m]Nixson[/name_m]. For me, [name_m]Nixson[/name_m] looks/sounds too much like [name_m]Nixon[/name_m], the president, and the association is too strong. I would prefer [name_m]Jackson[/name_m] though, and he could go by [name_m]Jax[/name_m]. (I know someone who did this and it was never an issue.) I really don’t like the extra ‘S’ in there since it’s unnecessary, so I would recommend sticking with either [name_m]Jackson[/name_m] or [name_m]Jaxon[/name_m].
Change his name. You can easily get rid of the stuff with [name_u]Kyle[/name_u] on it - you don’t need reminders of his Dad all around you anyway. You can send out new announcements and get the word out informally. I would do it sooner rather than later so there aren’t more and more places that you will have to deal with after the change.
As for your names choices, [name_m]Jaxson[/name_m] or [name_m]Nixson[/name_m], I prefer the spellings [name_m]Jaxon[/name_m] or [name_m]Nixon[/name_m]. I do much prefer the name [name_m]Paxton[/name_m] however. That said, it sounds like you were bullied once into giving your son a name you didn’t want to use, so this time around pick something you love.
I would definitely change it. I agree with some of the others that I would spell it, [name_m]Jaxon[/name_m]/[name_m]Nixon[/name_m], but I also think its 100% up to you and you should give him the name you love.
Your reason for the change is totally valid, and I think you should go ahead with it.
I really love your idea to incorporate his nickname X into the name to honor your father. I’m not sure if you’re looking for opinions on your name choices or other suggestions, but I do agree with others that the S in either name seems redundant. [name_m]Jaxon[/name_m] is good, but while [name_m]Nixon[/name_m] does have a cool sound, I personally can’t get past the association to one of the least-liked presidents in US history.
There are already a lot of great X suggestions in here, so I’ll take a more off-the-wall route. [name_m]How[/name_m] about [name_m]Decimus[/name_m]? Meaning “tenth” in Latin, it’s pretty much the name equivalent of the [name_m]Roman[/name_m] numeral X! You could call him [name_m]Dex[/name_m] for short, too!
I’m sorry you’re going through this, it must be stressful.
Like all others, I say, YES, change his name.
[name_u]LOVE[/name_u] the meaning behind the “x” in his future name. Like some others suggested, [name_m]Alexander[/name_m] (nn [name_m]Xander[/name_m]) or [name_m]Xavier[/name_m] (nn “X”) could be great options
