So this week I got 2 completely opposite comments on my own name. The first was “[name]Do[/name] you still like your parents after they named you that?” (and this from a doctor no less.) The second was from a pharmacist who must be a name nerd cause she got all excited (practically jumping up and down) and told me how much she liked my name and that it “sounds like something out of a book.” I think her comment is my favorite of all the many positive comments I’ve gotten on my name. I love to read, so I guess that’s why. I mostly get compliments on my name. Before the doctor’s line the worst thing I’d ever gotten was a camp councilor refusing to believe that my unusual name was my real name and insisting that I couldn’t put it on my name tag.
So my questions are:
What’s the best & worst comments you’ve had on your (or your kid’s) name?
What is going too far when sharing your opinion on another’s name?
[name]Do[/name] you have any personal etiquette for responding to others’ names?
Best: I think someone said it was pretty and whimsical once. Worst: Oh, lol. Like [name]Ren[/name] and Stimpy "-_-
2./3. I try not to insult people If I don’t like the name I won’t comment on it. If it’s really bad I might not be able to help pulling a face.
My name is CONSTANTLY mispronounced (it’s the uncommon, Hebrew pronunciation of a common name). I once had a teacher tell me “Well, I’ve had so many students called [the mispronunciation] that I’m just going to use it for you as well.” Um, no. That is not my name.
Well, my name is very common (Sarah), so it’s rarely remarked upon. Worst reaction? Singing the Jefferson Starship song “Sara”. Ugh. Also, when I’m asked if there’s an H on the end. Of course there is! It’s annoying because, in Australia at least, Sarah is rarely spelled Sara, and Sarah is pronounced Sair-ah, but Sara is pronounced Sah-rah.
The other day a cashier told me she loved my name and almost chose it for her daughter. Usually when I introduce myself to someone, they say “Oh, like [name]Gwen[/name] [name]Stefani[/name]!” it’s hardly a breach of etiquette, but it annoys me to no end anyway. I just want to scream, “No, not like [name]Gwen[/name] [name]Stefani[/name]! Like myself!”
People always assume that my parents are obsessed with Disney because both my first and middle names happen to be Disney characters, but that’s not how I got my name at all. The first is a flower and the second is a character from a novel turned animated movie. I don’t mind it though, it’s actually fun explaining how I did get my unique name
No, the names in my user name are not connected to my name at all.
My name is [name]Stormie[/name]…and no, it is not my fault that you’re having bad weather (my other pet peeve when it comes to my name.)
I’ve always had a soft spot for the name [name]Stormie[/name]/y. It’s so much more appealing than sister name [name]Rainie[/name] in my opinion. I think that’s so rude that people would assume it was a burden you’ve had to live with just because it isn’t run of the mill! The worst comment I’ve had about my name was “That’s such a mean girl’s name”. A movie from the 80’s made it synonymous with mean girls but that doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with my name, or that I’m mean as a result! It’s a flower! I think the nicest compliment I’ve had on my name was the fact that it was my Grandpa’s favourite. He insisted on it when I was born, and I’ve always liked it even if it was never the most unique.
My name is [name]Larissa[/name], and most people say it’s pretty. But people often mistake it for [name]Clarissa[/name], [name]Marissa[/name], etc. i don’t really get any outright insults or anything, which is good. Personally, if I don’t like someone’s name I wouldn’t say it at all. I’d probably just say it’s an interesting name or something, lol. I think it’s definitely inappropriate to tell someone their parents are crazy for naming them what they did, or anything like that.
I get many compliments on my name. It’s quite unusual (I’ve never met another), and people always ask me how to say it and then tell me how pretty it is. I usually spell it too, lol.
I also get people saying stuff along the lines of “Wow! What a name!” in the sense that it’s 24 letters total, and 10 syllables between first, middle, and last. Professors when calling roll typically pause at my name, get a horrified look on their face, say my name, and then ask “Did I pronounce that correctly?”. They usually do, as my name is pretty phonetic. This also means they typically remember the girl with the odd name, which I like but others might not.
My only peeve is when people misspell my name AFTER I’ve spelled it out/written it down for them, occasionally multiple times. Or mispronounce it after I’ve said it multiple times. The most common ones are [name]Tamara[/name] and Toe-veera.
My name is not supper common ([name]Raquel[/name]) but nobody has ever said anything rude about it. I personally think its rude to say something bad about a person’s name
Best comment: Your name is [name]Athena[/name]? That is so cool! I love it! (most compliments are pretty generic.) Worst: Your name is something super fancy, right?
I think it’s going to far when you refuse to pronounce it correctly or you’re blatantly rude about it. They didn’t chose their name, and what are you accomplishing by telling them that?
Not really. I try to avoid commenting on names when people announce baby names, ect. I’m much too timid to tell my cousin that naming her son [name]Ryan[/name] is unoriginal.
I have a pretty common name [name]Alexandra[/name] so I never really get comments either way.
Though with [name]Lexie[/name] as a nn I get a lot of “[name]Do[/name] your friends call you Sexy [name]Lexie[/name]?” While at this point I roll my eyes it’s really neither here not there.
My biggest pet peeve was when I lived on a road and in a town both of which were similar to my name. (apt #1 in building 2002 or something like that) - nothing ever got delivered to me and nobody took me seriously because they thought it was a hoax. I’d order a cab for the airport and then have to call when they were late and get the “oh, we didn’t send anyone we thought it was a prank - someone will be there in an hour” "great thanks, that’s not helpful and I can’t hail a cab in the sub-burbs at 4am).
My rules: If I love a name or it’s unusual I’ll remark upon that. Negative feelings are honored with silence. IF someone asks me for my honest opinion and uses the words “honest opinion” I might say something along the lines of nms. Though if you asked repeatedly for my thoughts you’d probably get the truth.
The “best” comments I’ve had is that it’s special. I don’t know, there seem to be some kind of glorification of special and unusual names, I personally don’t get it (probably because I have a rather special name (for my country, at least) and I’ve always hated it). Also, people always think that I’m of Hispanic descent (which I’m not). I haven’t actually had bad comments, but I’ve had loads of people mispronouncing it and misspelling it, which is one of the reasons why I hate it so much.
I would never tell someone to their face that I think their name isn’t very flattering or appropriate. However, when I’ve come across names that I really do like, I’ve almost always told the person. Going too far, I think, is telling someone directly to their face that you don’t like his/her name (or his/her child’s names). I just think that’s plain rude, and I think you ought to keep that to yourself.
I mainly just try to be polite. If I don’t like the name, that’s not something I’m actually gonna tell whoever. If I do like it, I tell the person.
The best is when people tell me its their favorite girls name ([name]Caroline[/name]) and before I got married, a lot of people said they liked the alliteration of my first/last (I did too). My mother was unsure about the alliteration but decided it worked out okay for [name]Caroline[/name] [name]Kennedy[/name] and went for it.
I think it’s going too far when you offer criticism when you aren’t asked for an opinion. If someone says, I plan on naming my son [name]Aidan[/name] SuchandSuch, I don’t think it’s fair to go off about how you’re sick of -aidan/-aydan names, they told you the name, they didn’t ASK.
Personal etiquette, the one time I’ll consider breaking #2 is if I notice that it spells something awful with the initials or is pretty undesirable said with a last name (“I’m planning on naming my son [name]Ben[/name] [name]Dover[/name]”) [name]Even[/name] then I’ll try saying it back to them to see if they notice on their own. If the baby is already here and named, game over, not saying a negative word about it.
Another personal etiquette is when I meet someone new with a name that I’m unfamiliar with/a name from another culture, I’m big on asking them to help me pronounce it correctly, not closest English approximation, I want to know how they say their name. I’m just a big believer that everyone deserves to be called by their name, not a butchered version.
The worst I’ve gotten is generally people who say, “Oh, that’s my dog’s name!” Yes, I know [name]Maggie[/name] is common name for dogs, but it’s a real name; it’s not like I’m named Fluffy or Mittens. I’ve had a few people, usually from other cultures, express surprise that my real name is [name]Margaret[/name], but nothing terrible.
I think it’s rude to say something negative about a stranger’s name. [name]Even[/name] if it’s a terrible name, it’s their name. It’s just as rude as saying, “Wow, your hair has a lot of grey!” or “Your legs sure are short!” Saying something nice is always welcome though.
2b. If it’s a name someone is considering for their baby, it would depend on the relationship and whether they are asking for advice or just telling me. If they are telling me, I wouldn’t criticize unless there is something really awful they may have overlooked, like they’ve never heard of Viagra and chose that name for their child or something.
As Lineska said above, I try to learn how to pronounce and spell the name correctly. My maiden name is French and hard to pronounce for non-francophones. It would drive me crazy to be on the phone with a call-centre and have to say and spell my name several times, only to hear, “Oh, you mean [mispronunciation].” No, I meant my name the way I said it, thank you. At least TRY to say someone’s name right, even if you can’t get it exactly.
If I don’t like the name I won’t comment on it. If it’s really bad I might not be able to help pulling a face.
