We are expecting our first child together, and he hates every single name I come up with. Be it a boy or a girl name, he just seems to hate it. We managed to settle on one girl name and one boy name, but I honestly don’t love either of them. I know it sounds selfish but if I’m growing the thing for 9 months, shouldn’t I get a little more pull in the naming arena? After all he already get’s 1/3 of the name automatically.
Tell him you don’t love either name and then get him to go through a baby name book and write down names he likes. Maybe there will be a name you [name]BOTH[/name] can love on this list. It’s worth a try. [name]Just[/name] don’t SETTLE for a name you don’t love. You’ll be saying this name a lot so you better [name]LOVE[/name] it. Ideally, both parent should make the decision together and be happy with the final choice.
Sorry sweetie, but a child’s name is a compromise and you can’t hold his last name over him since you can always double barrel (use both yours and his last name) or if you’re married and already took his last name, well then, you already missed your chance to have the last name talk/argument.
Also it is not the man’s fault for not being able to carry the baby, so you can’t use that argument either.
You both have to like the name. If you want another option, pick a name you love and use it in the middle. Otherwise keep looking, there are thousands of names out there, one of them you are both bound to like. Also if he’s hating all your name choices, make him make a list of his own. Maybe you’ll find something on his list you love just as much as him!
Agreed. I think it’s a bit selfish to think you get more naming right than he does. After all, the child is equal parts his as it is yours.
It’s just become so frustrating. He won’t come up with a list of names. He vetos everything I come up with. He has two children from two previous relationships. In voth of those instances he pickd one name, and the mom the other name. He said that since he didn’t like their choices, he’s picking the name this time. It feels incredibly unfair that I don’t get to have a say in naming someone I’m giving birth to.
You have to talk to him and make him realize this is a decision you [name]BOTH[/name] have to make. Let him know that this is a different relationship and you’re going to handle things differently. What is previous girlfriend/wife let him do, doesn’t meant you will. Plus if he picked one of the kid’s names, why doesn’t he like it?
From what it sounds, this doesn’t seem to be a very “healthy” relationship. You have to compromise. In the end you’re going to have to make him make an effort. Go through a baby name book together if he’s not willing to make a list on his own.
It seems you’re both being a little unfair and need work on finding away to meet in the middle.
What catloverd said.
Also, if it gets down to the wire, find a list of 20 or so names that you could live with and give it to him. Tell him to pick a name off the list and that’ll be your child’s name.