Ok I don’t know if this is just postpartum hormones but I am starting to wonder if I’ve picked the wrong name for my son… he is called Malachi… a name I’ve always loved since I can remember as it means my angel/messenger and I can shorten it to Kai. However some of his dads family members have started to call him ‘Mal’ which I absolutely hate it makes me cringe and I’ve since discovered it means ‘bad’ which makes it even worse. His dad says I can’t really tell people not to call him that as people make their own nicknames up… His dad calls him Mally which I don’t mind. But I started researching and apparently a couple of posts said they thought Malachi sounds like an evil name and they have bad connotations to it from a couple of films??! One person also said that it sounds like a ‘chav’ name and a troublemaker… so now I’m beside myself panicking that I’ve picked the complete wrong name for him that is with him for life. I’m researching name changes in UK since he is only a few months. Am I being completely stupid? In need of some thoughts and opinions as I’ve got myself into a bit of a emotional state over it?!
firstly, i really wouldn’t worry about other people’s people’s associations or preconceptions of his name they don’t reflect on him as a person and aren’t something to stress about unless it’s a really obvious bad association like a controversial historical character etc. if you love the name then don’t let these comments effect you.
malachi is lovely!! it’s really handsome, not too common but definitely familiar. i’m also in the uk and have known a couple of various ages and i think it’s really sweet but definitely suits all ages.
in terms of the nickname thing i understand not wanting him to be called ‘mal’. perhaps just politely tell the relatives that you’d rather he be called by his full name or your preferred nickname or just call him your preference around those people and hopefully they will catch on!
personally, i would say if you love the name then keep it. the only things that seem to be putting you off are the opinions of other people. however if you are genuinely starting to dislike the name then change it, there’s no shame in doing so but only if it’s on your own terms not because you’re worried about other people’s reaction to the name.
congratulations and i hope u find a solution xx
I wouldn’t worry about it being seen as a “chav” or “troublemaker” name. Maybe it can seem that way to older folk, but the name is actually quite trendy right now! It’s in the top 150 boy names in the US, and top 350 in England, so people will get used to it as the little Malachis grow up. You could always pull the “oh, well it’s Biblical!” card when anyone tells you it sounds “evil”, if you’re religious. Plus, Kai is a super usable nickname if he grows up and has any issues with how his name is perceived. I’d add that, you should keep in mind that no name will please everyone, and there will be someone who dislikes your son’s name and has bad connotations with it no matter what it is.
I think Mal is kind of unavoidable. If you really hate it, well… I’d personally give it time, maybe a couple more months to let Malachi and its nicknames settle. And if you still feel the same way, maybe changing his name is the right option for you. Of course, I think you should discuss it with your husband ASAP so he doesn’t get too attached to the name, if he isn’t already. Just something along the lines of “Hey, I don’t know how I feel about his name being Malachi. I’ll give it some more time before making any big decisions, but right now I don’t love it.”
Maybe try making a list of alternative names to consider while you wait to see if Malachi works for you or not, if that’d help you feel better!
I completely understand your dislike for “Mal.” For what it’s worth I have never heard of that as a nickname for it until now. If anything, I’ve heard [name_u]Kai[/name_u]. Which, it may be an uncomfortable convo to have it could be a short quick thing of “Id prefer you not use that and here’s why but there is this nickname instead.” Maybe the negative meaning hasn’t clicked to them and once it does it would lose all appeal to them as well. It I wouldn’t change his name just to avoid that conversation.
Thank you for your replies! You are all so right… I think I got a bit into my feelings after reading but as mentioned above I’m never going to pick a name that everyone likes! I love it and that’s all that really counts. He’s such a cutie and [name_m]Malachi[/name_m] suits him so well… I will next time just ask politely not to call him [name_u]Mal[/name_u] and offer all the other nicknames they can use! 
I’m also in the UK and think [name_m]Malachi[/name_m] is a lovely name. The fact that you’ve loved it forever is a really good sign, and I think you’d regret changing it because of negative comments online.
As for Mal/Mally, I actually think it’s really sweet and cool. I’m even a [name_u]French[/name_u] speaker and the “bad” thing doesn’t put me off at all. But if you don’t like it, it’s fine to say “Actually, he/we prefer Kai”. [name_m]Just[/name_m] be prepared for him to potentially choose a different nickname for himself when he’s older.
Good luck!
Firstly congratulations! 
Potentially I’m barking up the wrong tree but I’m certain we’ve actually spoken about Malachi before your son came along and how you were considering the name but had some reservations etc. I’m certain I said that Malachi is the name me & my OH have chosen if we are ever blessed with a son anyways if I’m wrong I’ve mistaken identity if I’m right congrats once again!
Anyways clearly I absolutely love Malachi honestly I do not understand the negativity surrounding the name he’s strong, biblical, universal, a Jewish prophet and literally means ‘my messenger’ the overall vibe is so angelic far from evil. Regarding the chav comment I think what tends to make names feel ‘chavy’ is if they are a fast fashion name which Malachi isn’t. Malachi is relatively low in the charts he’s recognisable but not every kid in Britain is called Malachi he’s great for that reason. Also I have to question the negative online feedback of Malachi it just seems odd to me when Old Testament biblical names like Noah, Ezra, Reuben, Gabriel are so popular why is the general public not loving Malachi the same way when he has the same vibe. The part of me that doesn’t have the rose tinted glasses on when it comes to our island that is Great Britain thinks something to do with subconscious bias comes into fruition here. Part of me thinks the reason why Malachi potentially receives a negative reaction is because the name is used commonly in the black community white people aren’t really using Malachi as often as they do Ezra or Reuben and because of institutionalised racism people are subconsciously having negative thoughts about Malachi. Why else would a biblical classic be deemed as evil or chavy but Gabriel with similar roots is handsome? Just doesn’t make sense! Of course i’m not saying this is the case but I think it is something that needs to be taken into consideration when looking at online forums or just talking with the general public.
Moving away from that mini rant above and onto nicknames personally even though I’ve been learning Spanish for sometime I do not think of the nickname Mal/Mally and think of the word bad. I actually think Mal/Mally is sweet (do prefer Kai) but what I would do is insist on calling him Kai and just correct people when they call him Mal. Just say we prefer Kai they’ll soon get the hint.
Finally your not being stupid naming is soooooo hard it’s a huge decision and decision making is hard. If I was you I would make a pros & cons list about Malachi really analyse the choice then take some time away from the Situation after a breather revise your list. Then make your decision from that point if you decide to Change it maybe make Malachi a middle name so you don’t completely loose him.
Anyways good luck & I absolutely love your sons name
I love [name_m]Malachi[/name_m]! From my experience, the nicknames family chose for my kids didn’t usually stick if my husband and I didn’t use them too. So I wouldn’t worry to much about [name_u]Mal[/name_u]. Enjoy your sweet boy!
Hey! Yes it was me and you’re previous advice strongly stuck with me 
He was also born at home unexpectedly without any medical persons - just me and his dad… (not deliberately but I just thought I had more time 
) … we really felt it was a miracle and this gave us even more of a reason to call him Malachi! Even just rethinking over this makes me think how on earth can I consider changing his name… especially only based on other people’s opinion! I think the main thing was the ‘mal’ nick name and then I started reading around it and saw some negative comments but I really agree with you that unfortunately these people may have those ideas just because it’s a name that is more commonly used in the black community. But I love it and I am definitely keeping it! His name is Malachi Joshua so could even go with Maj or mj at a stretch… Thanks for the lovely supportive message 
I think [name_m]Malachi[/name_m] is lovely and [name_u]Kai[/name_u] is a fun nickname.
You could ask your family to call him by his full name, but honestly, I think it’s better to get used to the nickname as in a few years Malachi’s friends might use it as well and then you won’t be able to say anything if [name_m]Malachi[/name_m] doesn’t mind himself. Instead I would try to come to terms with it somehow, maybe even ask for further help if your keep pondering the nickname topic as the more you think about the worse it will seem when in reality it might not be that bad at all. To me [name_u]Mal[/name_u] actually sounds quite cool.
However, I think what you can do is keep calling him by your preferred nickname, [name_u]Kai[/name_u], and hope it catches on 
Also, even though he’s still young, a name change may not bring you the peace you’re looking for either as you never know what nicknames people will get from even the most nickname-proof name.
It’s true! I can’t control what his friends will call him and with it being a 3 syllable name, chances are it’s going to be shortened! [name_f]My[/name_f] 3 year old calls him khi so maybe I’ll tell him to correct everyone… I’m sure he won’t mind! 
It might make you feel better that [name_u]Mal[/name_u] meaning “bad” is pronounced like “Mall” versus “Mal.” I’m in the US and I say Mal-a-kai as in the same sound as [name_u]Mallory[/name_u]. Im not sure if its pronounced differently in a British accent so forgive my ignorance there.
But I also feel that we can’t control if names are used as character names in movies. [name_f]Every[/name_f] horror movie has some character name right and I dont think it always taints a name. The name [name_u]Michael[/name_u] was incredibly popular fir decades snd that’s the villain in the Halloween movies. [name_m]Jason[/name_m] was also a popular name. Again, I am in the US so I dont know if these references count for you or not but I’m sure you get my point. I wouldn’t worry about the Children of the Corn movies, especially if you haven’t seen them. I haven’t seen those movies myself.
I think [name_u]Kai[/name_u] is a really cool nickname. And I think because you are okay with [name_f]Mally[/name_f] versus [name_u]Mal[/name_u], you could be blunt and make that correction. I think in this case its better to be rude/blunt than to go through this mental anguish. Its true that you can’t control nicknames all the time but if you can control them right now, I say correct people. Hopefully if they hear [name_f]Mally[/name_f] that will catch on over [name_u]Mal[/name_u]. [name_u]Or[/name_u] maybe [name_u]Kai[/name_u] will catch on which I love!
I dont think you should second guess this but if you are, [name_u]Kai[/name_u] could be an option you just change his name to? You can trust yourself and your feelings! But I think its a really nice name and I don’t think the majority of people are thinking this name means bad at all!
I don’t think you’re overreacting and it’s very normal to have doubts about such a big decision.
For what it’s worth, [name_m]Malachi[/name_m] is a lovely name. Versatile, classic but fresh, charming and cool!
I do think you can raise the fact you dislike [name_u]Mal[/name_u]. If your son decides he likes [name_u]Mal[/name_u] in the future, then there’s nothing you can do about that, but both my mum and my aunt have both expressed to other family members that they didn’t like the nicknames they gave me and my cousin. Maybe explain why you dislike it and suggest [name_f]Mally[/name_f] or [name_u]Kai[/name_u] instead?
Take some time to mull it over. See if the name settles, decide whether you still love the name, and maybe talk to his dad about it?
If it helps, I really like [name_m]Malachi[/name_m]. It’s a sweet but strong boy’s name!
[name_f]My[/name_f] 2 cents about people resisting your request to not call him [name_u]Mal[/name_u]:
I think if someone named their daughter [name_f]Astrid[/name_f], then they could absolutely ask people not to call her A$$. It’s okay for you to want people to respect your preferences.
I lI’ve the name [name_m]Malachi[/name_m]. I met a really cool little guy with the name at the playground awhile back and it made me love it even more. [name_u]Kai[/name_u] is such a cool nickname too. I totally understand why people calling him [name_u]Mal[/name_u] would bother you - I don’t like it either - but you have every right to say that you prefer he be called [name_u]Kai[/name_u] or [name_m]Malachi[/name_m], not [name_u]Mal[/name_u]. If it’s a name you’ve always loved I say stick with it! You’ll always be able to find negative commentary online about names you like so I wouldn’t let that turn you off it.
[name_m]Malachi[/name_m] is a lovely name! I met a little boy named [name_m]Malachi[/name_m] once and he was really sweet. It doesn’t sound mean to me at all. You have the right to ask people politely if they could not call your son [name_u]Mal[/name_u] because it means bad and you prefer the nicknames [name_f]Mally[/name_f] and [name_u]Kai[/name_u].
The next time you see these people, maybe just say “Hi …, I was wondering if people could please stop calling my son [name_u]Mal[/name_u] just because I prefer… and also I looked up [name_u]Mal[/name_u] and it means bad.” It will be a bit of an awkward conversation, but I don’t think it will end badly and it will probably make you feel better.
Yay I thought it was you! Would have been proper awkward if it wasn’t 
Firstly your so brave facing that situation I wouldn’t known what to do if me & my OH in that situation we’d be useless and I’d be a mess congratulations! He definitely is miracle and [name_m]Malachi[/name_m] [name_m]Joshua[/name_m] is such a gorgeous name. I actually think MJ is awesome and maybe when he’s older he can embrace the moonwalk just like MJ 
Good luck with everything & I’m glad I could help!
I agree with a lot of what’s been said already. I don’t understand why people think it’s an evil name. If you’re religious you can just tell them it’s a biblical name. And I wouldn’t worry too much about those perceptions because soon enough your family’s perception of the name [name_m]Malachi[/name_m] is going to be shaped by your son.
I think you can kindly & politely request family to use the nickname [name_u]Kai[/name_u] instead of [name_u]Mal[/name_u]. But I wouldn’t worry about it meaning “bad”. [name_u]Mal[/name_u] is a fairly common nickname for [name_u]Mallory[/name_u], so that’s probably what people would think of first.
I had a boy named [name_m]Malachi[/name_m] in my class throughout elementary school, and we all called him by his full name.
I really like [name_m]Malachi[/name_m] and [name_u]Mal[/name_u] is pretty cute honestly! They’re both fine but its fine if you don’t like [name_u]Mal[/name_u]. A name change seems unnecessary to me but if you think its the thing to do go ahead. What does your husband think? Postpartum time is rough lol. Good luck!