No idea where to start... Help please

General Name Discussion
1

[name]Hi[/name] again ladies (and gentlemen, if there are any others!) I made a post recently about whether my wife and I could name our baby [name]Knight[/name] or Knightley in honor of her maiden name. You guys made me realize it’s not a good idea, and while I am very thankful for that, I am feeling very lost now. We both are.

This is our first baby and one we never thought we would have. I struggled for years with problems with drugs, alcohol, home problems, you name it. When I was on the very edge, my now wife found me and kept me from jumping off so to speak. I did so much damage to my body over the years I never thought we would be able to conceive, in fact we were starting to look into adoption options when we got the positive test.

This is the happiest time in my life, which is why I am so frustrated right now that something that seems so simple (naming) has us both at such a loss. We honestly have no idea where to begin. Nothing seems good enough or perfect enough for our baby, which I hope doesn’t sound conceited but that is just how much this child means to me and I want him or her to have the very best, including the very best name. I really wanted to name him/her after my wife for being my angel but I don’t have any ideas besides her maiden name.

Since you are all name experts I just thought maybe you had some advice as to how to even get started now? I hate feeling so depresesd over something that should be SO easy. Thanks again.

2

First off, congrats to you and your wife!

As for naming, I would start with each of you writing down a list of names that you like/love, that way you at least can get a sense of what types of names you each prefer. I’d also make a list of family names that are important to each of you to use (if any), that way you can think about incorporating those into our child’s name if you choose. Next I’d get some baby names books (libraries are a great source of these if you don’t want to buy any) and just start going through them to get some ideas.

Honestly, I think the most important thing to do is not to stress out about it. Naming your baby should be fun and not some daunting task that you have to complete. Also there are plenty of other things you can get ready for when it comes to a baby, so if you’re having a case of naming block, I recommend concentrating on some of those things until you can come up with some names.

[name]One[/name] last thing, are you finding out the gender ahead of time? If so, you might want to wait until you know the gender to start seriously thinking about names. That way, you’ll only have to concentrate on one gender, which can be less overwhelming.

Good luck!

3

Thank you, [name]Pansy[/name], that is very kind.

I’m afraid babies were always so far from the forefront of my mind I never really gave thought to names myself, which is part of why I’m so lost. My wife’s favorite name (at least for a girl) is [name]Emily[/name], but she’s afraid it’s become too popular to ever use. [name]Baby[/name] name books is a good idea and as stupid as it sounds something I never thought of before.

It must sound ridiculous to be stressing out over a name like I am, I’m just afraid the baby will be here and won’t have a name or won’t have a name that’s right, if that makes sense. I feel like this should be easy and it’s frustrating the heck out of me that it’s not. We are going to find out the gender when we can. She really thinks it’s a girl and so I have been leaning towards thinking about girl names more since I definitely trust her intuition. She is 15 weeks right now so not much longer to go before we can find out.

4

Pull up the US Social Security name list for 2011 (or baby name list for your respective country if you don’t want the US). Print up two copies of say, the top 250 names. You get the green highlighter, your wife gets the yellow one. You each highlight names you like on your respective copies. Then, compare notes. Thus, you’ve gotten an idea of what types of names each other likes, and you’ve got a starting point for discussions. (If you like “vintage” names, you can search the census data back to 1887-ish for name ideas. It’s fun to see how names have changed - and stayed the same - over the decades and centuries.)

If you want more unusual names, search for names outside the top 1000 (on the US census list - not sure what other countries offer). Repeat the above process.

There’s also a great website called Nymbler that allows you to plug in names you like and then it will generate other suggestions based on the names you’ve given.

Look at your family trees for ideas as well. Are there family members that hold a special place in your heart? Consider using their names or using those names as a starting point for more ideas. Also consider famous people you admire for names - maybe you’re big fans of American literature, so [name]Mark[/name] [name]Twain[/name]/[name]Samuel[/name] [name]Clemens[/name], [name]Nathaniel[/name] [name]Hawthorne[/name], [name]Arthur[/name] [name]Miller[/name], F. [name]Scott[/name] [name]Fitzgerald[/name], [name]Louisa[/name] [name]May[/name] [name]Alcott[/name], or [name]Emily[/name] [name]Dickinson[/name] could be names to consider, etc etc. Maybe you admire the early rock 'n roll artists of the 50’s and 60’s, or great Renaissance painters. Peruse those names, etc.

Congrats on your baby, and good luck!

5

Congratulations on the baby.

Have you looked at the list of popular names? Anything that you like there? [name]Just[/name] to get an idea of what you like?

Is there some special meaning that you would like the name to have?

If your wife likes [name]Emily[/name], but worries about popularity what about the following less popular ideas:

[name]Amelia[/name]
[name]Emery[/name]
[name]Emmeline[/name]
[name]Eliana[/name]

6

I second pp’s suggestion of Nymbler. Enter [name]Emily[/name] in there and see what comes up! Also I just wanted to say that although it’s very popular, [name]Emily[/name] is a great classic and worth considering. Some names with the same “feel” as [name]Emily[/name]:

[name]Elizabeth[/name]
[name]Caroline[/name]
[name]Cecily[/name]
[name]Fiona[/name]
[name]Madeleine[/name]

7

I agree with all the previous suggestions. I think you have to start by understanding what your naming styles are.

I’ve listed a bunch of names below, in all different styles. If you want to pick out which ones you like it might help to get an idea of your tastes.

[name]Abigail[/name]
[name]Olivia[/name]
[name]Penelope[/name]
[name]Mackenzie[/name]
[name]Georgia[/name]
[name]Grace[/name]
[name]Fable[/name]
[name]Willow[/name]
[name]Hannah[/name]
[name]Lucy[/name]
[name]Catherine[/name]
[name]Saskia[/name]
[name]Skye[/name]
[name]Valentine[/name]
[name]Charlotte[/name]
[name]Thea[/name]
[name]Isla[/name] (eye-luh)
[name]Juniper[/name]
[name]Pippa[/name]
[name]Scarlett[/name]
[name]Ava[/name]
[name]Brittany[/name]
[name]Jasmine[/name]
[name]Zahara[/name]
[name]Susannah[/name]
[name]Madeleine[/name]
[name]Adeline[/name]
[name]Cecilia[/name]

I’d love to hear which ones you like/don’t like, and I’d be happy to give more suggestions :slight_smile:

8

Thank you all very much for replying (and so quickly, too!) You see so much bad on the Internet, it’s refreshing to find a group of people so willing to help some crazy talking guy like me :slight_smile:

Lucystone, we had no idea there was such a list. That’s kind of amazing! I think we will go even further and print off the full top 1,000 from the U.S. and just kind of make it into a game. It sounds kind of fun and maybe it will help take this edge of stress off about naming. I have also bookmarked Nymbler, thank you.

Sadly neither of us have much knowledge of our families outside the immediate ones; I am not at all close to my family and while my wife is to her parents (she’s an only child), she doesn’t exactly want to name our child after them either. Haha :slight_smile: I can’t really think of any famous people or things I admire either, at least not enough to name our baby after. But it is a good brainstorming idea and we will both try to think on it some more. Thank you for this, and for the congratulations and luck too (I feel like we really need the second!)

Danishnames, thank you first of all. We haven’t looked yet but it sounds like that is our next stop. Meanings are something I actually think would be really neat to have, especially if there was a name that meant “angel” or “savior” or something like that. Maybe even “love”? Is there a good place to search names by their meaning that anyone knows of?

I also passed your suggestions on to [name]Kristen[/name] and she likes [name]Emery[/name] and [name]Emmeline[/name] :slight_smile: Thank you.

[name]Elisabeth[/name] [name]Rae[/name], I did not even think about putting [name]Emily[/name] into the Nymbler website - we will try that too, thank you. It is a very lovely name and it’s something my wife has loved since she was a young girl, but she is insistent that it’s too popular around here and she really doesn’t want a lot of other children having the same name as ours (we sound picky now, huh? Haha!) if at all possible. I showed her your names, too, and she really likes [name]Fiona[/name].

Bounceparty, is it bad that I didn’t know there was such a thing as naming styles? Haha! Thank you for taking the time to do this for us. I like [name]Abigail[/name], [name]Willow[/name], [name]Juniper[/name], and [name]Jasmine[/name]. [name]Kristen[/name] likes [name]Fable[/name], [name]Willow[/name], [name]Lucy[/name], [name]Valentine[/name], [name]Juniper[/name], and [name]Madeleine[/name]. I think the only names neither of us particularly like are [name]Mackenzie[/name] (too many around here), [name]Saskia[/name] (a bit too foreign for us - wouldn’t seem right using it), and [name]Brittany[/name] (known way too many over the years.) I’m not a huge fan of [name]Isla[/name] because I want to say Iss-luh, but she likes it okay.

I will let everyone know our results from the top 1000 names :slight_smile:

9

This is a great website for searching for names by meaning: http://babynamesworld.parentsconnect.com/

It lets you search for names by meaning, as well as a bunch of other things (beginning letter, ethnicity, etc).

10

Another excellent website is www.behindthename.com. I’ve found they tend to be the most accurate website in giving the actual meaning of a name. You can search for words in a name’s meaning or description, and they also have a “Name Themes” section.

11

First of all congratulations, and good luck to you and your wife.

I think a good idea would be to write a list with your wife, note all the names you like dislike, and some you find OK. You can then see what sort of style names you like, such as Cutesy names, Vintage names, Modern/Hipster names, [name]Wild[/name] and crazy names etc. Nameberry is very useful once you know what style of names you like they offer many lists and forums discussing the type of names you can name you little bundle of joy.

Once you find a few names you like, you can then discuss it with your wife and then find a suitable middle name (if your using one)
you might want to honour someone, use a family name or just use one because you want to.

You could also play a few name games with you wife, and a new name you may like could just jump out to you. There’s plenty of time throughout the pregnancy to decide on names, some people even have to look at their baby to decide the name, so don’t panic. My sister was stuck with the same name [name]Lily[/name] throughout her pregnancy, and when my niece was born she looked at her and thought this isn’t a [name]Lily[/name] and now her name is [name]Isabelle[/name] [name]Efa[/name] ([name]Eva[/name])

But anyway, good luck and I’m sure you’ll find the perfect name eventually!

12

Thanks for sharing your story!

If you want to honour your wife with your baby’s name, have you thought of using part of her first or middle name? For example, my brother was named after my grandfather ([name]John[/name]) but given the name [name]Jonathan[/name]. My middle name is [name]Carole[/name], so I had thought that if I had a baby girl, I would name her [name]Caroline[/name] (or [name]Cora[/name], [name]Kara[/name] etc) -something similar to the name, but unique as well.

Another thought I had was this: if your wife’s last name is [name]Knight[/name], you could find the name of a [name]Knight[/name] from the [name]King[/name] [name]Arthur[/name] stories that you like. Here are some of the names of [name]King[/name] [name]Arthur[/name]'s Knights of the round table:
[name]Arthur[/name]
[name]Tristan[/name]
[name]Lancelot[/name]
Percivale
[name]Kay[/name]
Bors
[name]Gareth[/name]
[name]Gawain[/name]
Gaheris
Bedevere
Gerraint
Galahad
Lamorak

OK… so some of them are completely unusable, but they could be modified… or do a bit more research into names of Knights from other stories. :slight_smile: It might be fun to see what you come up with.

13

No worries, I’m sure many people don’t think about naming styles! Perhaps it’s just a Nameberry thing!

I think you picked some very pretty names! I’m kind of thankful you don’t like [name]Mackenzie[/name] or [name]Brittany[/name] - not that they’re bad names, they’re just kind of trendy and overused.

Some combinations I came up with from the names you liked:
[name]Abigail[/name] [name]Juniper[/name], [name]Abigail[/name] [name]Jasmine[/name], [name]Willow[/name] [name]Valentine[/name], [name]Madeleine[/name] [name]Lucy[/name], [name]Fable[/name] [name]Madeleine[/name], [name]Madeleine[/name] [name]Willow[/name].

Since you both like [name]Willow[/name] and [name]Juniper[/name], which are both nature names, here are some more suggestions along those lines:
[name]Willa[/name]
[name]Daisy[/name]
[name]Azalea[/name]
[name]Clover[/name]
[name]Fleur[/name]
[name]Ivy[/name]
[name]Violet[/name]
[name]Laurel[/name]
[name]Lily[/name]
[name]Iris[/name]
[name]Dahlia[/name]
[name]Hazel[/name]

Other suggestions:
[name]Tess/name
[name]Felicity[/name]
[name]Isabel[/name]
[name]Lydia[/name]
[name]Charlotte[/name]
[name]Freya[/name]

I’d love to hear what you think of any of these names, and also what you like in the top 1000! Good luck :slight_smile:

14

[name]Pansy[/name] and Holey, thank you very much for both of those websites. Those are definitely going to be our next step to help generate some ideas. I think it will be a lot of fun :slight_smile: Going through the government list last night was actually a lot more fun than I thought it would be, and for the first time so far I haven’t felt completely stressed about this whole naming business. It was a nice change, I definitely prefer it to feeling like I’m somehow already the worst father ever.

Bethlow, first off thank you for the congratulations and luck :slight_smile: We actually started playing around with list-making last night for the first time and it actually was a lot of fun. I’m still not exactly sure what our style(s) are, but hopefully you all can help with that because you are the experts! And thank you for sharing your story about your niece, that does make me feel a little better as well. Like I said before, I somehow feel like I am lined up to be the worst dad in the world all because I can’t seem to find a name that feels “right” and its just been eating at me.

Lilysong, I love your [name]King[/name] [name]Arthur[/name] idea SO much. [name]Tristan[/name] is literally only one of four boys names we found and agreed on from the top 1,000, and I really like it because it felt like a male version of her name ([name]Kristen[/name]). I had no idea about the [name]King[/name] [name]Arthur[/name] connection. I really like the sound of [name]Gareth[/name], too, and so does my wife.

Bounceparty, those are all very beautiful sounding, and I thank you for them. Nothing is still really bouncing right off the page (or screen in this case) at me, but I really hope it will soon. We both do love nature, especially flowers (I’m an amateur gardener… I REALLLLLY stress the amateur…) so I really love those names, especially [name]Azalea[/name], [name]Violet[/name], [name]Lily[/name], and [name]Iris[/name].

We did go through the top 1,000 names last night and it was definitely more fun than either of us expected. We found a LOT of girls names to at least semi-agree on… not that we would necessarily use them ([name]Kris[/name] really does NOT want a super popular name), but we like them regardless.

[name]Emma[/name]
[name]Emily[/name]
[name]Lily[/name]
[name]Autumn[/name]
[name]Faith[/name]
[name]Jasmine[/name]
[name]Violet[/name]
[name]Annabelle[/name]
[name]Eleanor[/name]
[name]Vivian[/name]
[name]Eden[/name]
[name]Aurora[/name]
[name]Melody[/name]
[name]Willow[/name]
[name]Hazel[/name]
[name]Hope[/name]
[name]Ivy[/name]
[name]Fiona[/name]
[name]Emery[/name]
[name]Bianca[/name]
[name]Iris[/name]
[name]Arabella[/name]
[name]June[/name]
[name]Rosalie[/name]
[name]Regina[/name]
[name]Meadow[/name]
[name]Cambria[/name]
[name]Juniper[/name]
[name]Esme[/name]

… and a whopping four boys names:

[name]Tristan[/name]
[name]Graham[/name]
[name]Jasper[/name]
[name]River[/name]

Overall, I personally am really liking the flowery names for girls :slight_smile: [name]Kristen[/name] LOVES [name]Cambria[/name], [name]Eleanor[/name], [name]Rosalie[/name], [name]Regina[/name], [name]Emily[/name], and [name]Esme[/name] (that last one is pronounced a little weird for me, though). She really loves [name]Cambria[/name] right now. Coheed and [name]Cambria[/name] is a band both of us really enjoy and we actually went to one of their concerts with baby to be in tow, though we weren’t aware of that at the time :slight_smile: She also loves the nickname [name]Cam[/name].

For the boys, my favorite so far is definitely [name]Tristan[/name]. I love it, love it, love it, for the first time I can actually say that about a name. I love it because of its similarities to [name]Kristen[/name] and I love the knight connection to it. She likes it, and she also likes [name]Graham[/name] a lot ([name]Billy[/name] [name]Graham[/name] is a big idol of hers, and she really likes the overall sound, too.)

15

I think you have a good little list going!

[name]Jasper[/name] [name]Gareth[/name]?
[name]Jasper[/name] [name]Tristan[/name]?

[name]Graham[/name] Is very cracker to me, but if it has family significance, I give the ok. otherwise, it could make a nice middle name. :slight_smile: [name]River[/name] is actually kind of handsome but I’d prefer it in the middle as it is sort of ‘out there’

For girls, you have such a lovely long list! I’d exclude these for popularity:
[name]Emma[/name]
[name]Emily[/name]
[name]Lily[/name]
[name]Jasmine[/name]

And I’d exclude [name]Emery[/name] for just being fluff, with no substance (it’s recently invented).

I think you just need to be cautious when pairing your names. Something like [name]Iris[/name] [name]Meadow[/name] or [name]Violet[/name] [name]Hazel[/name] sounds kind of silly and description-like, so I’d stick to one nature/ word name per combo.

Ideas:
[name]Ivy[/name] [name]Eleanor[/name]
[name]Annabelle[/name] [name]Violet[/name] (I personally prefer the simpler spelling [name]Annabel[/name] because it looks more streamlined)
[name]Juniper[/name] [name]Fiona[/name]
[name]Iris[/name] [name]Fiona[/name]
[name]June[/name] [name]Arabella[/name]
[name]Rosalie[/name] [name]June[/name]
[name]Vivian[/name] [name]Hazel[/name]
[name]Regina[/name] [name]Violet[/name]
[name]Regina[/name] [name]Hope[/name]
[name]Regina[/name] [name]Meadow[/name] (kind of like “queen of the meadow” but not too obvious. I like it)
[name]Iris[/name] [name]Eleanor[/name]
[name]Iris[/name] [name]Arabella[/name]
[name]Rosalie[/name] [name]Pearl[/name]
[name]Rosalie[/name] [name]Hope[/name]
[name]Rosalie[/name] [name]Joy[/name]

What I recommend now is to look up the meanings and associations with the girls names and see if that info helps you fall in love. For instance, [name]Iris[/name] is the Greek goddess of the rainbow, and the flowers were so named, because they come in every color, like the rainbow. [name]Regina[/name] is queen. [name]Juniper[/name] was a saint with an interesting story as well as a tree and berry. [name]Eleanor[/name] has lots of admirable, strong, historical women to recommend it. [name]Vivian[/name] means alive. Hopefully finding meanings and associations behind the names you like can push them into [name]LOVE[/name] category. :slight_smile:

Also, [name]Theodore[/name], [name]Isadora[/name], [name]Isidore[/name], [name]Theodora[/name], [name]Dorothy[/name], [name]Dorothea[/name], anything with that DOR inside of it, probably means gift.

16

Here are some ideas for names NOT in the top 1000.

[name]Alaric[/name]
[name]Octavian[/name]
[name]Oren[/name]
[name]Flynn[/name]
[name]Finlay[/name]
[name]Lachlan[/name]
[name]Robin[/name]
[name]Leander[/name]
[name]Archer[/name]
[name]Fletcher[/name]
[name]Ambrose[/name]
[name]Robin[/name]
[name]Bjorn[/name]
[name]Bram[/name]
[name]Caspar[/name]
[name]Devlin[/name]
[name]Jolyon[/name]
[name]Leander[/name]
[name]Odin[/name]
[name]Silvan[/name] (forest)
[name]Theo[/name]
[name]Theron[/name]
[name]Soren[/name]

[name]Cecily[/name]
[name]Constance[/name]
[name]Florance[/name]
[name]Allegra[/name] (musical term, and means happy, lively)
[name]Clementine[/name]
[name]Isadora[/name]
[name]Ramona[/name]
[name]Cordelia[/name]
[name]Tamsin[/name]
[name]Zinnia[/name] (flower)
[name]Guinevere[/name]
[name]Viola[/name]
[name]Beatrix[/name]
[name]Ginevra[/name]
[name]Freya[/name]
[name]Kerensa[/name]
[name]Linnea[/name]
[name]Willa[/name]
[name]Imogen[/name]
[name]Coralie[/name]
[name]Calista[/name]
[name]Dahlia[/name]
[name]Irina[/name]
[name]Aviva[/name] (spring)
[name]Amabel[/name]
[name]Mabel[/name]
[name]Bronwen[/name]
[name]Anwen[/name]
Elowen
[name]Isolde[/name]
[name]Rosalind[/name]

17

Mei_Mei, thank you :slight_smile: I didn’t really think about [name]Graham[/name] and crackers to be honest, we pronounce the crackers “gram” and the name “[name]Gray[/name]-m” but that’s a really good point so we probably won’t consider it for a first name, especially since we are caucasian and cracker is a derogratory term.

My wife does love [name]Emma[/name] and [name]Emily[/name] but she doesn’t want to use them for the same popularity reasons, so they’re really just on the list to figure out what kind of “style” we have, if any. We really don’t want anything super common. I had no idea [name]Emery[/name] didn’t have any sort of meaning to it. It was an [name]Emily[/name] substitute that [name]Kristen[/name] loved the sound of, but we don’t like the thought of it having no meaning. Meaning is something really important to me, and to a lesser extent to her as well. From your ideas we really like the sound of [name]Ivy[/name] [name]Eleanor[/name], [name]June[/name] [name]Arabella[/name], [name]Rosalie[/name] [name]June[/name], [name]Regina[/name] [name]Meadow[/name], [name]Rosalie[/name] [name]Pearl[/name], and [name]Iris[/name] [name]Arabella[/name].

We are definitely going to start looking more into history and meanings, so hopefully as you said maybe it can make the right name finally start clicking. I like that [name]Regina[/name] means queen, which is something I call [name]Kris[/name] a lot. I like the meaning behind [name]Vivian[/name] a lot, too :slight_smile: My wife is still very stuck on [name]Cambria[/name] as well, and I’m having a hard time thinking of a boys’ name I like better than [name]Tristan[/name]. It’s kind of funny, I’m having trouble finding a girls’ name and she’s having trouble finding a boys’ one.

I had no idea that “dor” names had anything to do with gift! We will add those to our suddenly growing lists of ideas :slight_smile: Thanks so much. We actually like a couple of the non-1000 names names, too! We like [name]Oren[/name], [name]Silvan[/name], [name]Theron[/name], and [name]Soren[/name] for boys; and [name]Constance[/name], [name]Linnea[/name], Zinnea, [name]Irina[/name], and [name]Amabel[/name] for girls :slight_smile: Thank you so much again.

18

I don’t see why you could use [name]Knight[/name] for a middle name for a boy and Knightly for a middle name for a girl, I think they are quite nice!

[name]Connor[/name], [name]Quinn[/name], [name]Archer[/name], [name]Sloan[/name], [name]Kieran[/name], - [name]Evan[/name] or liam [name]Knight[/name] sounds Nice!
[name]Evelyn[/name], emmeline, adeline, nora, [name]Alice[/name], - lilah Knightly is very pretty

Congratulations.

19

If you like [name]Emily[/name], perhaps you could use an alternative name meaning the same thing. The name [name]Amelie[/name] is the French for [name]Emily[/name], so perhaps you could use names like that?

My best friend is named [name]Gareth[/name], his middle name is [name]Thomas[/name] which fits in quite well. [name]Gareth[/name] also means gentle if you didn’t know already, which has a nice meaning behind it. You may like some other Welsh names so I’ve found a few that are similar to [name]Gareth[/name];

Gethin (A popular name here in [name]Wales[/name] pronounced like the start of [name]Seth[/name], Geth-in)
[name]Geraint[/name]
Garyn
[name]Owain[/name]
[name]Bleddyn[/name] (The double d is pronounced like the TH in though. Bledd-in)
Carwyn
Hywel ([name]Hugh[/name]-el)
Iestyn
Iowan
[name]Rhys[/name]

20

For what it’s worth, I think [name]Knight[/name] would make an excellent middle name for either gender. I didn’t see any other threads by you regarding [name]Knight[/name] so I don’t know what others said. I think something like [name]Emmeline[/name] [name]Knight[/name] or [name]Tristan[/name] [name]Knight[/name] would sound great. And in my opinion, taking [name]Knight[/name] literally, I always loved stories about women wanting to become knights, so I think a little girl would love this.