Not feeling hubby's name pick, looking for outside opinions

We’re expecting daughter #2 and I’m not feeling my husband’s choice for her. In all fairness, I selected out first daughter’s name ([name_f]Hazel[/name_f]) and it’s his turn to pick names.

He wants to name our daughter [name_u]Sloane[/name_u]. I think it’s a great strong name for a woman but my concerns are:

  1. I immediately think of things that it rhymes with that are bad (bone, moan, loan… etc.) and I’m concerned that it’s ripe for being picked on by other children.
  2. I’ve had some people mis-read this name as “slow-ann”.
  3. I’ve had people mis-hear it as “[name_u]Joan[/name_u]” (I’ve tried it at Starbucks)
  4. There aren’t any cute nicknames for it while she is little.

That being said, I’m totally hormonal and really do want to honor his turn.

Is there anyone out there named [name_u]Sloane[/name_u]? [name_f]Do[/name_f] you like it? If so, what do you like about it?

Or anyone have advice on coming to peace with a decision to honor your partner’s wish?

Nope, I think you’re completely rational. [name_m]Even[/name_m] if it’s his turn, I think it still sucks if you don’t like the name. What about coming up with a list you both like and just let him have the final say? That way you still honour his turn but with a name you like as well.

That being said, I personally dislike [name_u]Sloane[/name_u], so maybe I’m a bit biased too.

Personally, I adore [name_u]Sloane[/name_u]. I’ve never heard anyone make jokes about it. If you are sceptical about it, think up some other options! I’m sure you can find something you both adore!

Some names that strike me as similar to [name_u]Sloane[/name_u] but compatible with [name_f]Hazel[/name_f].

[name_f]Senna[/name_f]
[name_u]June[/name_u]
[name_u]Vega[/name_u]
[name_u]Quinn[/name_u]

I think you should have to compromise if it’s his turn, but I don’t think that means you lose veto power. Was he really against [name_f]Hazel[/name_f] or did he just not like it as much as you did?

  1. I immediately think of things that it rhymes with that are bad (bone, moan, loan… etc.) and I’m concerned that it’s ripe for being picked on by other children.

First, lots of names can rhyme with words that are not the most positive. Second, a bully will find something to bully another child over. It could be their clothes, their hair color, the way they talk, the side of town they live on, etc, etc.

  1. I’ve had some people mis-read this name as “slow-[name_f]Ann[/name_f]”

People mis-read, mis-hear lots of names. People misspell and mispronunciate all types of names. I have a very simple 4 letter name (spelled correctly), lots of people misspell it. My son’s name, a well known Gaelic name, is pronounced three different ways by strangers. [name_m]Even[/name_m] though there are well known actors with his name.

  1. I’ve had people mis-hear it as “[name_u]Joan[/name_u]” (I’ve tried it at Starbucks)

read above

  1. There aren’t any cute nicknames for it while she is little.

A name does not need a nickname. [name_f]Hazel[/name_f] is also a short name. As for a pet name, one might develop.

[name_m]How[/name_m] did your husband feel about [name_f]Hazel[/name_f]? Was it a name he also felt a strong attachment for? Or did he give in to it, just accept it? Before your daughter was born; did he adore it, love it, feel neutral about it, or was not fond of it? I personally would not take turns naming my children but that is what the two of you chose. As you said, it is his turn.

I do not know anyone named [name_u]Sloane[/name_u].

If it’s “his turn” to choose a name, then I would allow him to do just that. I’d just honestly tell him you’re not a fan of [name_u]Sloane[/name_u]. Ask if he has any other names he’s considering. It’s not entirely fair if you got full reign on the first child’s name, told him he can for the second, and then take it back entirely because you dislike his choice.

I feel neutral about [name_u]Sloane[/name_u]. It’s not really my style, but I think it’s a nice name.
(Makes me think of [name_m]Ferris[/name_m] Beuller’s pretty girlfriend, which is somewhat positive.)

I agree with @lovemysweeties. Bullies will bully, and people will mispronounce and/or mispell names. (My friend [name_f]Michaela[/name_f] is often misheard as ‘[name_f]Kayla[/name_f]’ (Starbucks) and mispelled as [name_f]Makayla[/name_f], Mykala, [name_f]Michella[/name_f], etc. etc. And it’s always something to laugh about, like “Look how they spelled my name this time! Lol!”) Honestly, I don’t think [name_u]Sloane[/name_u] will have that many problems. Especially if you purpose to clearly annunciate. And as friends and family, people you interact with on a daily/weekly basis learn her name, they will spell and pronounce it correctly. Plus, I think [name_f]Hazel[/name_f] and [name_u]Sloane[/name_u] sound great as sister names.:slight_smile:

I like [name_u]Sloane[/name_u]! :slight_smile: I’m kind of surprised actually that people have mispronounced it and misheard it as [name_u]Joan[/name_u]. It’s pretty straightforward to me, at least. As for the nickname thing, I agree that [name_u]Sloane[/name_u] is fairly nickname-resistant, but you could give her a nickname that doesn’t relate to her name, or one that includes her middle name. For instance, Sloane [name_f]Isabel[/name_f]la could go by [name_f]Lola[/name_f]. So maybe you could pick a middle name like that that would allow you to use a nickname you’d like better. If you really don’t like [name_u]Sloane[/name_u] though, maybe you could bring that up to your husband, even if it’s his turn to pick the name. It’s possible there are other names he likes that you would be more okay with.

I love the pp’s suggestion of [name_u]Sloane[/name_u] [name_f]Isabella[/name_f] nn [name_f]Lola[/name_f]!

Personally, if you two chose to not choose together, and to allow one another to choose, it has to be fair. You chose your first’s name, so he chooses baby two’s. Be honest with him, though, and tell him how you feel.

I think [name_u]Sloane[/name_u] is a lovely name, but if you don’t like it, then you don’t like it. [name_f]Hazel[/name_f] is adorable, by the way.

Some suggestions are…

[name_u]Simone[/name_u]
[name_f]Ramona[/name_f]
[name_f]Margot[/name_f]
[name_f]Elowen[/name_f]
[name_u]Wren[/name_u]
[name_f]Philippa[/name_f]

[name_m]Don[/name_m]'t have anything to add about the situation with your husband beyond what other posters have already said. But on the nickname front, I knew a [name_u]Sloane[/name_u] who was sometimes called Sloanie by her friends. It was pretty cute, even though [name_u]Sloane[/name_u] is not my style at all. And nicknames often happen organically and may not be related to the name at all — you could end up calling her Sis, for example.

Personally I think [name_f]Hazel[/name_f] and [name_u]Sloane[/name_u] are cute together!

If you don’t like the name I am sure he would want you to express that.

I agree with two previous posters that said if you decided that you were going to pick separately, I think you should try to uphold that.

However, if he just didn’t contribute to [name_f]Hazel[/name_f], or if he backed down, or said he didn’t care about the name; or, if you thought of [name_f]Hazel[/name_f], brought it to him, and he agreed… that seems less like an agreement of “I will choose this one and you will choose the next one, okay, deal” and more like “hey, you chose the last one so I should get to choose this one!”

If it’s the latter, I think you have a say. If it’s the former, like I and others have already said, you should try to honor that as you would want him to honor your pick–but I think it’s fair to say you don’t love it and let him make up his mind about whether he’ll use it or not. But I think if he decides to use it, you will learn to love it!

Then again, even if you did decide together that he would name this one, I think a good marriage/relationship tool is the ability to be flexible. I know that if I had this arrangement with my husband, and he didn’t like the name I chose, I would probably choose another (with few exceptions). It’s better to have a baby with a “second choice” name, rather than creating and sustaining conflict over a name–after all, it’s our child.

IDK if any of that made sense, but I hope it did! As for my personal opinion, I do not like [name_u]Sloane[/name_u], for whatever that’s worth.

Have you told your husband how you feel? I would sit down and talk about it, because that conversation is likely to happen sometime, and it’s a whole lot easier now than when you’re in labor. I’ve known several women (both of my sisters included) who’ve agreed to a name they didn’t love, only to realize at the last moment they couldn’t go through with it. One of my friends even said (jokingly) that right after birth is the best time to pick a name, because “What man is going to argue with his hormonal wife after she just pushed an eight pound object out her nethers?” I’d try to come up with something you both like. I like the suggestion of letting him pick from a list you came up with together.

That being said, to answer your question, I think [name_u]Sloane[/name_u] is a lovely name. I don’t think it has any more potential for teasing than any other name.

I think both parents need to agree on the baby’s name. He is suggesting [name_u]Sloane[/name_u], but you have veto power. Ask him to suggest other names and share your concerns with him

If you picked out [name_f]Hazel[/name_f]'s name by yourself with little or no input from your husband, I would say your husband should get a turn in choosing this one’s name and get to use [name_u]Sloane[/name_u]. If you were both involved in the process though and it was just that [name_f]Hazel[/name_f] was originally your suggestion, and he likes it too, I think you should pick something else that you both love.

But personally, I really dislike [name_u]Sloane[/name_u], so maybe I’m biased! It always sounded like a combination of slow and moan to me.

I think the pronunciation is pretty straightforward. You could spell it [name_u]Sloan[/name_u] to make it clearer. That way it looks like the word loan with an S at the beginning, the E on the end might make it look more like it could end with “ann”? And as for nicknames, I think [name_f]Lolo[/name_f] would be really cute. I’ve seen [name_f]Coco[/name_f] suggested as a nickname for [name_f]Colette[/name_f] or [name_f]Cordelia[/name_f], [name_f]Lolo[/name_f] for [name_u]Sloane[/name_u] makes just as much sense.

I’ve never been a fan of [name_u]Sloane[/name_u], because it reminds me of slow, lazy people and moan, groan, which evolves to complaining… all things annoying. It also has never felt feminine or attractive to me, I don’t know why. But that is my opinion, me [name_f]Laila[/name_f], my personal opinion.

I understand that it’s your husband’s turn naming a baby, but perhaps it won’t hurt you or him to look for a plan b name or something that he will like and you will like a lot more than [name_u]Sloane[/name_u].

It’s never easy to name a child, but I’m sure everything will end fine!

I would highly encourage your husband to pick a few more options lol I also dislike [name_f]Sloanne[/name_f] tremendously, it just doesn’t ring like a pretty name for a woman, much less a little girl. There are plenty of other strong female names I’m sure he can choose from lol

Sorry, but [name_u]Sloane[/name_u] is so unattractive to me. There is just nothing pretty about it, and it certainly doesn’t go with [name_f]Hazel[/name_f], which is old fashioned and lovely. I think you both need to love the name. You don’t love it, so I would continue the search. Good luck.