only child + honor names

so my SO and I have decided that when we are ready to have children that we ideally want to stop at one. This will of course be a few years away but it’s already got me thinking about naming scenarios. The biggest question I have is about honor names: to use or not to use. Since there would only be one kid to name, I feel as though choosing an honor name from one side of the family would be unfair to the other side of the family. There’s no option of “this baby will be named for your side and the next will be named for my side”. If we decided on using an honor name, I would prefer to use one only for the middle spot and to only have one middle name. So in order to be fair and avoid any possible upset feelings is it better to just skip an honor name all together and just choose two names we both adore? Has any one else dealt with this? Any opinions and thoughts are appreciated!

Ya your exact scenario I would skip on the honour names and just use names you adore

If you had grandparents (for example) you wanted to honor and their names started with the same letter, you could use that letter to find a name. Otherwise, it’s probably best to go with names you love so there isn’t any bitterness on either side.

Yeah unfortunately we have no shared family names or initials. The only name that we both like that would honor both sides are [name_f]Lucy[/name_f] [name_f]Josephine[/name_f] or [name_u]Josie[/name_u] [name_f]Lucille[/name_f] ([name_f]Lucy[/name_f]/[name_f]Lucille[/name_f]-my side, [name_f]Josephine[/name_f]/[name_u]Josie[/name_u]-his) but nothing for a little boy which stinks because I would love to honor my grandpa

I have 1 and that’s all I am having. We just picked a name we both loved.

The child will inherit dna from all 4 grandparents…that should sufficiently honor them. Best wishes!

I would use whatever I wanted, and if that was to honor one side and not the other, that would be my choice and not for family to get upset over. Use what you like, honor your grandpa if it’s important to you, and don’t worry about what the peanut gallery has to say. :slight_smile:

Thank you all for the great feedback! I’m glad I have a while to think about this, it’s a tough decision but you guys have some valid points from both sides

I plan to have multiple children, but even if I only had one I would honor my grandfather with a middle for him or her. We were closer than I was with any other grandparent, which my parents understand and won’t care about and all of my grandparents have passed, so they can’t get upset. There’s not really any reason you have to tell the other side (unless they are very familiar with your family line) that you even used an honor name. And in any case, most people would get over a slight such as that very quickly