Hello! My husband and I are expecting our first, which was due… last week. We haven’t told our family the sex (its a boy!) and we haven’t told them any name choices. We decided that we wanted to go into labor with a short list of potential names, and then choose one when we meet the babe and can see if it “fits”, but I’m starting to get worried I won’t know which one is right! Any reassurance from others who have gone this route?
I’m also starting to get worried that our names suck but that we won’t know since we haven’t run them by anyone. So… Internet strangers! Help me think about our names!
Our last name starts with B and is two syllables, if that matters. The baby’s middle name will be [name_m]Joseph[/name_m], and the first names we are considering are [name_m]Nathaniel[/name_m]/[name_m]Nathanael[/name_m], [name_m]Henry[/name_m], and [name_m]Oscar[/name_m]. I like [name_m]Nathaniel[/name_m] but my husband wants to use the french spelling, which I think is weird, and he doesn’t like any of the nicknames the kid will most likely get (hates [name_m]Nate[/name_m]!). [name_m]Henry[/name_m] and [name_m]Oscar[/name_m] are both family names. [name_m]Henry[/name_m] is so popular, I almost wanted to avoid it for that reason (it is the #2 name in our state), and Husband says [name_m]Oscar[/name_m] reminds him too much of [name_m]Oscar[/name_m] the Grouch but he’s left it on the list because its a family name. I think we can limit the [name_m]Oscar[/name_m] the Grouch connotation by using a cute nickname ([name_m]Oz[/name_m]/[name_m]Ozzie[/name_m]).
I think they are all three good picks. I would pick [name_m]Oscar[/name_m] personally but I don’t think you have a bad pick there.
We didn’t name our baby until she was 3 weeks old, which is considered early where we live (2-4 months is typical). I come from a ‘name ready at birth’ culture and I was antsy about it, I’ll admit. We didn’t even really have an official shortlist at birth. But once she was here and I had her in my arms suddenly it honestly didn’t matter that much anymore. Of course it was still important but it wasn’t important that we get it done right now this minute. I lost all sense of urgency. Those weeks were about learning how to care for her and getting to know her. The ‘right’ name just gradually settled on her.
It was fine and you’ll be fine too. [name_m]Don[/name_m]'t feel pressured to make a decision right away, even when you have just given birth. Birth is an overwhelming experience and I would probably not recommend making the decision in that state anyway unless it just strikes you like a bolt of lightning when you see him. You have time, even if your culture says it’s weird not to name at birth, you are not legally required to (you probably have at least a few days depending on where you live - we have six months but I know other places are more ‘urgent’ about it) and can certainly give yourself a breather if you need one.
[name_m]Oscar[/name_m] [name_m]Joseph[/name_m] is adorable.
I would caution not to use [name_m]Nathaniel[/name_m]/[name_m]Nathanael[/name_m] if anyone hates [name_m]Nate[/name_m], unless you have a specific target plan on how you’re going to avoid [name_m]Nate[/name_m] coming to pass, because it will at some point or another. You can always patrol the nicknames at home and when they’re young and you control their world, but school is a free-for-all.
[name_m]Henry[/name_m] [name_m]Joseph[/name_m] is nice and my second choice, but if it will bother you to hear competing Henrys at the playground, I think [name_m]Oscar[/name_m] is your pick!
I also don’t think you have to rush at all. You can either just decide now, or if not, take your time to meet him when he’s born.
I love the name [name_m]Nathaniel[/name_m], but if [name_m]Nate[/name_m] is undesirable, perhaps [name_u]Neil[/name_u] could stick? A nickname is probably inevitable with this name, so it’s all about getting the right one and starting it early. [name_m]Even[/name_m] [name_m]Nathan[/name_m] could work, but even if he’s [name_m]Nathan[/name_m] at home, he’ll probably get [name_m]Nate[/name_m] at some point or another.
[name_m]Henry[/name_m] is cute, especially with [name_m]Joseph[/name_m] as a middle. It’s old fashioned but popular enough that you can picture the name on a toddler as well. It would definitely age well. And personally, I wouldn’t be swayed by a name being too popular. If it’s the name you adore, then why shouldn’t you be able to use it just because others use it too? But that’s just me…
I’m not a huge fan of [name_m]Oscar[/name_m], for the same reason your husband is not.
In the end, just go with what feels right for him!
I think [name_m]Henry[/name_m] [name_m]Joseph[/name_m] is the best choice. If you can’t agree on the spelling of [name_m]Nathaniel[/name_m] and he doesn’t like [name_m]Nate[/name_m], that’s probably not a good choice. And if he still has the [name_m]Oscar[/name_m] the grouch association, that’s probably a no go. All great names though!