Okay, maybe hate is too strong a word. But anyway, my partner and I are no where near a place where we would have a baby, but being the name nerd that I am, I am already concerned about her dream of naming a future daughter after her mother [name_f]Helen[/name_f], a name that is absolutely not my style.
My main thing is that she is clearly in love with this idea and has been for a long time. And I don’t want to take that away from her. I would be devastated if she shot down my dream of having a little boy named [name_m]Wesley[/name_m] with no compromise. But, I don’t like [name_f]Helen[/name_f] or any of her variations.
Again, no where nearing having a baby. I guess I just am interested in hearing if any of you have had experience with this kind of thing and how you resolved your differences. Any advice is welcome!
I’m not a big fan of my SO’s mother’s name [name_f]Grace[/name_f] [name_f]Catherine[/name_f], it’s pretty name but it’s just not what I’d name my daughter, esp. [name_f]Grace[/name_f]. I have looked into variants of her middle name & found [name_f]Katharina[/name_f] / [name_f]Catharina[/name_f] which also honor my [name_m]German[/name_m] heritage. For [name_f]Grace[/name_f], I have looked into names that mean “grace” so any “[name_f]Anna[/name_f]” name - I happen to like a lot of these [name_f]Ana[/name_f]ïs, [name_f]Anouk[/name_f], & [name_f]Annika[/name_f]. [name_f]Annabella[/name_f] possibly, could be from [name_f]Amabel[/name_f] or influenced by [name_f]Anna[/name_f].
Also, you could honor her in some other way - what about her MN, favorite flower, birth month, birthstone? If your SO would agree that would be a great option.
Whoa what an awesome resource! I hadn’t looked [name_f]Helen[/name_f] up on behind the name, and it hadn’t even occurred to me that [name_f]Nell[/name_f] was a diminutive! I love [name_f]Nell[/name_f]. Thanks so much.
I was going to suggest [name_f]Nella[/name_f]! I believe that [name_f]Helena[/name_f] Bonham [name_u]Carter[/name_u] gave her daughter this name to honor the many women named [name_f]Helena[/name_f] in her family.
[name_f]Helen[/name_f] does have some nice variations and diminutives. I went looking around after my SO’s grandmother died last year and [name_f]Olena[/name_f] is my favorite.
I like the suggestion of [name_f]Nell[/name_f]. That seems like a reasonable enough compromise, if you can get your partner on board.
My only other suggestion is maybe using names with meanings similar to [name_f]Helen[/name_f]'s. [name_m]Just[/name_m] off the top of my head, [name_f]Lucia[/name_f], [name_f]Lucy[/name_f], [name_f]Nora[/name_f], and [name_f]Elena[/name_f] all have light in their meanings.
Personally I like [name_f]Helen[/name_f]/[name_f]Helena[/name_f]/[name_f]Elena[/name_f], I think [name_f]Helen[/name_f] of [name_m]Troy[/name_m], the multiple [name_m]Saint[/name_m] [name_f]Helen[/name_f]'s/[name_f]Helena[/name_f]'s, I always look for stories behind names and that will normal make me like it a lot more. But I can see why it’s not loved by all.
I think the suggestions of a favourite flower or birth stone is a good idea. [name_f]Nell[/name_f] is really sweet and short!
I completely understand your position, my partner wants to name any child we have (we’re a long way off kids too) after him, [name_u]Tristan[/name_u], I like his name but not enough to have a daughter with the exact same name as him! The more I refuse, the more he insists.
Good luck and hopefully you can find a happy medium!
Definitely would compromise with [name_f]Helen[/name_f] as a middle name. First name should be something you both love. I am a fan of honoring loved or dearly departed ones with middle names and have done so for both my kids. One for my grandmother, the other for hubby’s mother.
