I posted a few months ago and had some really kind and helpful responses. This has been a very emotional topic for me and I really appreciate non-judgemental and helpful advice. I am getting help regarding my post natal anxiety, however, I would like to express that this is something I must resolve and I’m coming here to get your help.
While I was pregnant my husband and I could not agree on a name. I like classic style names - [name_m]French[/name_m] themed as my name is very unique and [name_m]French[/name_m] and my initials were handed down to me as well. Naming my baby is such an important thing and I really wanted to get it right but my husband didn’t like anything I suggested - even the names I truly loved.
When she came early we had to choose a name and I said [name_f]Indi[/name_f] as it was his favourite name, but I was concerned about it being a nickname. We found [name_f]Indira[/name_f] and loved the meaning but I’ve struggled to see it as her name. It doesn’t help that anyone we’ve met who is from [name_f]India[/name_f] asks us why we chose it as it is a very strong [name_f]Indian[/name_f] name - they are flattered and pleased, but it concerns me as we’ve chosen a name outside our culture and I believe in choosing a name that is strong in your own culture.
My husband wouldn’t even remotely discuss this for some time, but he has agreed to change the name if it is the right name. I love the name [name_f]Macy[/name_f] for it’s french association with the town Massy and I like the spelling [name_f]Maicy[/name_f] as it’s similar to [name_u]Maison[/name_u] which means home in french, which I love.
Should we simply shorten [name_f]Indira[/name_f] to [name_f]Indi[/name_f] officially? My husband likes the [name_f]Indy[/name_f] spelling - but I’m unsure. Her currently middle name is [name_f]Pearl[/name_f]. Making her initials IP as in I Pee. I have a lot of trouble with this as my initials are CHT and are very meaningful for me due to their family connection. My husband didn’t like any of the CH names I like.
Should we change her middle name so it’s [name_f]Indi[/name_f] ???
Should we change her first name to [name_f]Maicy[/name_f] and make [name_f]Indira[/name_f] a middle name?
I’d love your help, but please be aware this is extremely hard on me and I’ve been in tears for months about this. Please be gentle.
I’m sorry this has been so heart wrenching for you, I hope you reach an outcome that really works for you!
Does your husband like [name_f]Macy[/name_f]/[name_f]Maicy[/name_f]? If you really love [name_f]Macy[/name_f] then I think it’s probably the best choice, however I would keep the spelling as [name_f]Macy[/name_f] just because it’s less likely to be gotten wrong. [name_f]Macy[/name_f] [name_f]Indira[/name_f] and [name_f]Macy[/name_f] [name_f]Pearl[/name_f] are both lovely, so that might be a good conversation to have with your husband regarding if he wants to keep being about to call her ‘[name_f]Indi[/name_f]’ (assuming you’re comfortable with that). I do think [name_f]Indira[/name_f] is a beautiful name, but it doesn’t seem to be the one for you.
I’m wondering what C and H names you’ve discussed? In case there are more options there? Or if your husband is now on board with the name change maybe he could find some he likes and you could go from there.
I do think that perhaps the initials might be a difficult thing to manage, and that’s a shame because it has so much meaning for you, but you never know, maybe one day your little girl will hear the story of her name and use CHT as initials for her baby. Things often have a way of working themselves out - but if it’s something you really want to have a shot at, well, no harm no foul right?
Oh darling,
I’m so sorry to hear that you’ve been having such a hard time with this. I think the fact that you’re finding it so difficult says to me that perhaps the name isn’t sitting right with you and changing it would be a good move. I named my daughter and never looked back. It suited her perfectly and nothing else would have fit. Perhaps indira doesn’t suit her?
I really like every name you’ve mentioned above. I don’t find either [name_f]Macy[/name_f] or [name_f]Indi[/name_f]/[name_f]Indy[/name_f] too nicknamey at all. I love the middle name [name_f]Pearl[/name_f] and I don’t even think initials IP are a problem.
Of all the suggestions above, [name_f]Indi[/name_f] [name_f]Pearl[/name_f] would be my favourite, but I honestly don’t think you can go wrong with any of them. [name_f]Macy[/name_f] [name_f]Pearl[/name_f] is my second favourite.
I think [name_f]Maicy[/name_f] [name_f]Indira[/name_f] would be lovely, and you could still call her [name_f]Indi[/name_f]/[name_f]Indy[/name_f]. I know several people that go by nicknames that are actually nicknames for their middle names, so if you really love both [name_f]Maicy[/name_f] and [name_f]Indy[/name_f] that could be a good compromise. If naming her [name_f]Indira[/name_f] has just made you stressed, it might be in your best interest to change it, but I think you should name her whatever you like the best. If you don’t have a problem with double middles, you could go with [name_f]Maicy[/name_f] [name_f]Indira[/name_f] [name_f]Pearl[/name_f], which I think is lovely as well!
I do think that if you are already having such a hard time with naming her [name_f]Indira[/name_f], it might be better for you to change it. It is a lovely name, but you don’t want to regret the name forever. It would also be better for her if you changed it sooner rather than later. It seems to me that you really love [name_f]Maicy[/name_f], and it has a lot of meaning to you.
I think all the options you have laid out sound lovely. [name_f]Indira[/name_f] [name_f]Pearl[/name_f], [name_f]Indi[/name_f] [name_f]Pearl[/name_f], and [name_f]Maicy[/name_f] [name_f]Indira[/name_f] all sound so pretty. It’s a tough call, but I think [name_f]Indi[/name_f]/[name_f]Indy[/name_f] [name_f]Pearl[/name_f] seems like the fairest compromise for you and your husband. It has a similar -ee ending that [name_f]Maicy[/name_f] has, but it’s not a total uproot from [name_f]Indira[/name_f] either. [name_f]Indi[/name_f] sounds perfectly fine as a standalone name to me.
As for the initials, I wouldn’t worry too much. First and middle initials are rarely used alone together, so she’ll be IPX, obviously with the X in place of your actual last initial. If you’re worried about monogrammed items, they put the last initial in the middle, so it would be IXP. If anything, IP makes me think of computers, as in IP address.
You have all been so kind and lovely. I will share these responses with my husband. I’m glad you like all the options here. I just want her to have the most beautiful name.
I’m so sorry for the difficult time your are having. I agree that names are really important, and it sounds like the right thing for your family to make a change.
I really like [name_f]Maicy[/name_f] [name_f]Indira[/name_f] or [name_f]Maicy[/name_f] [name_f]Pearl[/name_f], my favourites from your list. I like your thinking behind the [name_f]Maicy[/name_f] spelling. [name_f]Indi[/name_f] would also work as a first name. Either spelling [name_f]Indi[/name_f] or [name_f]Indy[/name_f] is fine. Or, have you considered other names you can get the [name_f]Indi[/name_f] nickname from - [name_u]Indigo[/name_u], [name_f]Ingrid[/name_f], [name_f]Inez[/name_f]? Or alternatives such as [name_f]Maisie[/name_f] (still with reference to the [name_m]French[/name_m] maison), which has a slightly different pronunciation to [name_f]Macy[/name_f]/[name_f]Maicy[/name_f]. [name_f]Maisie[/name_f] is [name_f]MAI[/name_f]-zee.
I also agree with pps that if you choose [name_f]Maicy[/name_f] [name_f]Indira[/name_f] she could still be called [name_f]Indi[/name_f] by her dad. When you think about it many of us are called by different names by various family and friends. Best wishes in thinking it through with your husband.
I’m so sorry that you’re so hurt over all this! Sending hugs!!
[name_f]Indi[/name_f] is a tad incomplete to me, but I do like it. I prefer this spelling over [name_f]Indy[/name_f], personally. I really love PP’s suggestion on [name_f]Maisie[/name_f] for you. [name_f]Maisie[/name_f] [name_f]Pearl[/name_f] is adorable, though [name_f]Maisie[/name_f] is a diminutive of [name_f]Margaret[/name_f] which means [name_f]Pearl[/name_f]… I thought I would throw in my own name (edited for privacy).
I know you’ll find peace and the right solution soon! Best wishes, dear
